Containment What If?

Sakamoto said:
somejerk said:
it would be bound to not be a 100% identical copy of whatever "original hand-drawn" mess he handed to his tattoo artist.

They pretty much can, since they print art onto a transfer which goes on the skin for the artist to trace into tattoo form. A guy I used to work with asked me to write something in Japanese for him to get tattooed, and I did so in rather plain hiragana with a sharpie on some scrap paper, thinking the tattoo artist would fancy it up, but the guy came back with the tattoo exactly the way I had it on the paper I gave him, same size and all.

But, yeah, Chris probably wouldn't be up for the pain involved. Although he did get his ears pierced, so, it can't be ruled out. Sonichu seems the obvious choice, but I think he'd go for his "Cutie Mark", since he's a total Bronie Tomgirl.

never underestimate spergs and their ridiculous laserbeam fixation on minutiae. To a sperg, "Pretty much"="Not at all"
 
KatsuKitty said:
Why would anyone ask this question?

WE MUST KNOW EEEVVVEEERRRYYYTHING
But no, your right Chris is gross and this question is gross

Chris would want a cutie mark of his "tomgirl symbol" (AKA the transgender symbol :tomgirl:) in blue and orange (go lancers!!) in his thigh, he'd make it about a centimeter of a line on his tattoo and then fight or flight would kick in due to his hypersensitivity. He'd leave the parlor and have a badass centimeter long line for a tattoo.
Or Sonichu on his face, it's all good.
 
You know, I actually thought of posting "What if Chris is a babyfur?" back then considering babyfurs are quite notorious in the Sonic fanbase.

Sonichu.
 
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Alan Pardew said:
You know, I actually thought of posting "What if Chris is a babyfur?" back then considering babyfurs are quite notorious in the Sonic fanbase.


Ugh sonichu babies.

He'd complain he was a better artist than the tattoo artist.
 
Blue Max said:
Christian Weston Chandler
Man Sized Humanoid (Increasing this to Large doesn't quite work, he's not the size of a Grand Piano)
Human Commoner 1 (He's not an Expert, and he doesn't have PC levels in anything)
Alignment: Neutral Evil (He's selfish and wants things without really giving much in return)

Str: 6 (generously assuming he can move more than he indicates)
Dex: 8 (He's at least willing to try to dance)
Con: 6 (Chores wear him out.)
Int: 10 (Chris has terrible problems, but forgetting things and not having some knowledge isn't one of them...)
Wis: 4 (Chris and his money are soon parted)
Cha: 4 (Needs to wear an attraction sign to get women to interact with him... come on)

BAB +0 / Grapple -2
Attacks: Odd Knife 1d4 -2 @ -2 Melee, or Megatron Pistol 0 @ -1 Ranged
AC: 9 (-1 Dex)
Saves: Fort -2, Ref: -1, Will -3


Abilities:
Incontinence (Ex): If Christian Weston Chandler suffers 1 point of damage, fails a will save or a skill check by 5 or more, he automatically soils his clothing. This has several effects, including a -10 on social checks, doubling the range of scent, and automatically ruining attempts to disguise himself.

Curse Ye Hama Ha! (Ex): Christian Weston Chandler can use this attack as a Standard Action. The Foe must make an Knowledge Local Check (DC 15) to fully understand that this is entirely ineffective, or else ponder the possibilities of some of obscure curse has been placed on him.

Sinophilia (Ex): Chris' great desire for China can delude him into taking self-destructive (not suicidal) actions as if he had fallen prey to a suggestion check. An acceptable mate can simply implant a suggestion with an ordinary bluff check. If they allow Chris any kind of physical contact with them (such as a kiss or embrace) they gain a +4 circumstance bonus on their attempt to make Chris follow their suggestion.

Skills:
Profession Cartoonist 4 Ranks
(That's All)

Equipment:
Sony Playstation 3
Toy Guitar
Sonichu Medallion

He can cast "Stinking Cloud" spell at will, and a minimized, shortened "Berzerker Rage" twice per day.
 
Taurine said:
Let's say Chris violates his probation and is sent in the slammer. Let's also say that CWCVille is a real city. What if you became the mayor of CWCVille?

For starters I'd give Alison Amber carte blanche to rebuild the entire city from the ground up. Then I'd change its name to Snyderville. After that I'd put a competent business exec or economist in charge of a job creation program for the city's residents. Last but not least, I'd push for the building of a 60,000-seat sports arena to attract tourists and improve the city's economic climate.

And just for fun I'd burn every picture of CWC I could find.
 
MrTroll said:
Because I only really care about him insofar as he provides me entertainment, my answer depends entirely on how well this new and improved Chris would fill that role. If he managed to find gainful employment, become a productive citizen, and learn to treat people with basic respect, but he disappeared off the internet entirely, well, that wouldn't do at all, I'm afraid. But if he could strike some kind of happy balance where he is no longer a miserable, self-loathing layabout but still finds time to make an ass of himself on Youtube, that would be just perfect for everyone, I think.
I'd be fine if he left the Internet, plenty of lolcows on the pasture.
 
Ah, an old thread dragged back to the front page, but I wasn't around when it started so I want to get in on this too.

First, all city laws are repealed, the laws of the State of Virgina are in effect. Anyone currently jailed for violation of Cwcville law is pardoned.

Second, start the process to hold free elections for a city council and my successor. If any local city laws are needed, the new city council can propose them and put them up for vote. I'll also leave renaming of the city up to them.

Third, all Cwcville city welfare programs are discontinued. The city treasury will not be used to provide housing and credit cards for friends of the former Chandler regime. Anyone who wants a career "protecting" Cwcville must apply to the Police academy and become a legitimate law enforcement officer.

Forth, an investigation will conducted on members of the Chandler regime who while enforcing the will of the former mayor violated the rights granted to citizens by the US and State of Virgina. The assets of those found guilty will be seized and distributed to victims of the regime.

Fifth, the FCC will be asked to assist in investigating station KCWC.

Sixth, the Mayoral office will be relocated out of the mall to a new City Hall (possibly a re-purposed Soup Hotel) with the City Council. The former Mayor's Office will become a memorial museum in honor of the victims of the Chandler regime.
 
Honestly I would like to believe I would try and fix the city, I probably wouldn't though. The mayor having unlimited power thing is a big apple of Edan. You could do whatever you wanted. At the most I would actually try and fix that sinkhole of a city and quit four or five days in.

I would probably legalize Tobacco considering it's a cash crop. Those soup hotels would have to go, at least most of them. The main goal would be to get people to actually work in the city so I could lower the levels of homeless people, can't make money if there's nobody working. Once most of the soup hotels were abolished I would change the currency to regular U.S currency. It's either that or secede from the U.S. finally I would need to find a way to get those shitty recolors working and off welfare. That will probably end in violence though.

Of course I'm more likely to kill myself or abuse the unlimited power of the Mayor for life position.
 
Legalize cigarettes, I'm gonna need them if I have to deal with little hedgehog shits all day. Then I'd legalize weed, I'm gonna need them if I have to deal with little hedgehog shits all day. Alcohol prices gotta drop and I need a office full of nippers, I'm gonna need them if I have to deal with little hedgehog shits all day. (I'm done copying now). Welfare for everybody's gotta go. If they don't like it they can leave, then I'll run a ghost town, American tourists love that shit.
 
cubesandcubes said:
Quarantine the area, conserve some of the more "interesting" landmarks in a kind of park/outdoor museum, sterilize the rest of the area with hard x-rays, hire Gilles Tréhin and his wife to develop a comprehensive master redevelopment plan for the area.
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KatsuKitty said:
Pull everyone out.

Nuke it.

Put everyone back in.

Nuke it again.


"I say we take off and nuke the entire site from orbit...

...it's the only way to be sure."
 
Arm the furious, sonichu-hating homeless and strip all electric-hedgehog pokémon of all rights
 
I agree with Blue Max. Chris would probably try to go back and sleep with one of his classmates. At the same time, I think Chris would probably try to stop his father from taking him back to Ruckersville by ensuring that their house sold. Chris seems to think that his life went direly south as a result of some conspiracy that kept the house from selling, so this might be one of the things he'd try to fix. By doing that, Chris would then assume that his life would be better and that he'd be more likely to score with his former classmates, get a better life, and so on.

If it's the first, I see it unfolding along the lines of Blue Max's lines. However if he focuses on staying in Midlothian, then he'd probably end up getting disappointed that nothing ended up the way he thought it would. The only big changes would be that he'd be in a busier area with more places to get himself banned from. Instead of attending Piedmont Virginia Community College, it'd be John Tyler and instead of going to UVA to look for girls, it'd be VCU. However there it might be slightly more interesting to see how Chris would be received at VCU, as it's a little more eclectic than UVA tends to be- or at least that's how I see it. Chris would probably freak out at how gay friendly the campus is and would probably poo himself if he saw the big drag queen handing out flyers for the yearly big drag event that is held near the campus.

I think it'd be the same story for the most part, but maybe longer before he cracked. I don't know that he'd have as big of an adversary as Snyder and the Game Place. There are a few gaming stores in the area, so who knows?

I think it would probably depend on the girl, what she demanded of him, and what she was willing to give or prove in return. Chris is an idiot, but he's grown more paranoid over time. I doubt he'd get a tattoo just to impress a girl unless she was willing to do things for him in return or was at least someone he saw every day. For something of this nature I think he'd demand china in the hopes that she'd put out, but also subconsciously as an attempt to make her prove that she's not a troll.

Now assuming that he'd agree to it, the girl in question would have to hound him a lot- and I mean A LOT. Remember how difficult it was for various girls to get Chris to do small things such as draw pictures for them or make videos? Imagine that times a hundred. Getting a tattoo would require Chris saving his money, something he's already shown he can't do and I don't know that Barb would be willing to pony up the dough for this, especially if she thinks he'd get something girly. It'd also require Chris to put together a final design idea as well as to find a good tattoo parlor. I see Chris agreeing to do this, but always coming up with excuses as to why he can't. There's the pain factor as well, but we'll assume that he'd be able to handle it.

Now if Chris does manage to gather the money and decide on a design, I think that the design would depend on what the girl is telling him. It'd ultimately be his choice, but I can see the girl in question trying to influence his choice. I don't think she'd tell him to get a pickle or JULAY!1 inked on to him anywhere, but I think she'd press for a Sonichu design. Chris would also have to deal with the input from the tattoo artist, as I think that some would probably try to get him to look at the shop's designs and/or any original designs that they might come up with. I think that the final tattoo would probably be on his butt like a MLP cutie mark, but be some version of Sonichu mixed in with a cutie mark idea such as an ink and pen.

I honestly can't see this happening even if Chris were to get into the actual tattoo parlor. I see him arguing with the tattoo artist to where the guy refuses to work with him. However if he does ever get a tattoo, expect to see pictures. Chris would probably consider it his duty to show his facebook friends his new ink.
 
Meeko is winnar. You really have to try and get inside Chris' mind to answer this one. Yeah, he's directed a lot of anger at people that he feels initiated the trolling and yeah, he wishes to have vengeance on them, but he's an enormous pussy that would never confront any of them (certainly not with the intent to be violent), and that's really not his priority anyway. What is? China. Combine that with this weird (and steadily intensifying) obsession he has with his days in high school, and it's pretty clear that he'd go back and try to bang Kellie Andes or whoever that chick was that he's delusional enough to think he had a shot with. In Chris' mind, he really, truly thinks that not going after her was a mistake.
 
Black Sonichu said:
DrChristianTroy said:
Would he though? While he has stopped making it we have never seen or heard any evidence that he regrets creating it. The fame it brought but between his continued use of Sonichu in games/user names and his recent post about it not being dead I highly doubt this would be it.

Big_Pete_33 said:
THe new question will be how bad the new timeline will be for Chris?
Just as bad as now or worse. I honestly can't see him making any choice that would improve his life.

If he refused to go back to March 2000 and stop Sonichu from being made, then I would say that I've taken dumps that have more brains than him. :stupid:

I've never taken a dump that can think. I would see a doctor about these sentient dumps.
 
What if Barb died and Bob was still alive?

Before you go "oh boy another goddamn barb dying post", picture this, Bob is alive and well and Barb has passed on. Bob was generally seen as a better parent. What would Bob do without Barb to coddle and baby Chris? How would Chris be doing now?
 
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