Containment What If?

[Enjoy your spaghetti]

I'm trying to come up with a scenario where would get another husband or even a boyfriend. But I just can't. I'm not that creative

Barb goes to the hospital because her colitis and scabies are acting up to the extreme. Somehow she and a male nurse hit it off...?

Sorry, that's not very plausible either. No self respecting male would want to hang around Barb for too long.

Ran Coleman Yeats comes back from the dead and realizes what a good thing he had with Barb. Cold showers, bare ass beatings, and bizarre scenarios become part of Chris's life and he gains a new understanding of Coleslaw.

This "how can get a mayun" bit could turn into a fun game though.

 

[Mourning Dove]

It's like asking what would happen if Hitler didn't exist. The world wouldn't change. Some other exceptional person would simply take his place to make the lols. Therefore we would still all be friends on this forum!

 

[Grand Number of Pounds]

I believe we've discussed this before.

In the past I said she'd find another scurrilous male and would be jealous of Chris and make Chris move out.

Now I think Chris is more likely to get married than Barb, and that's extremely unlikely. I doubt Hoardzilla would be able to find a man nasty enough to marry her. Right now I think Barb is fine with and eating 's and spooning with OPL.

 

[LordCustos3]

*I'm not not too interested in speculating about the possibility of Barb going lesbo since it seems to me even more unlikely than her finding a new man, but if anyone wants to discuss this than go ahead.

Gaaah!
Why would we do that?
Are we masochists?

 

[José Mourinho]

He would not be one of the greatest lolcows we know today, and either DrMusic2 or ADF may be the greatest lolcow.

 

[Foulmouth]

he'd still be retarded

And gay.

And fat.

 

[José Mourinho]

I don't think Chris would care unless his dad is very strict even to him.

 

[CWCissey]

How many of you are willing to be he'll use a Sonichu skin for his player model?

Oh it's a sure thing. He'd also call himself 'Sonichu1982' or something that makes him easy to identify, so we all know who's creations to grief and build pickles near.

 

[Trombonista]

It would explain the .

 

[Donald Duck]

I think Chris would welcome it, at least in the beginning. Remember he was desperate to get Cole to come back to take care of Barb for him, so a (very) hypothetical stepdad would be a godsend to him as it would grant him freedom to roam outside again and continue his love quest. Plus the stepdad would, in theory, provide some much needed income, freeing much of Chris' for him to waste. I think he'll only resent the new guy if he were to try to force Chris to get a job or gets tough on him when Chris inevitably gets into trouble again.

 

[rotten pickles]

He is know for eating large amouts of food in public plus in one of his videos he downed a donut or something in a few seconds. thoughts?

 

[fuzzypickles]

He'd fail hard at it just like every other competition he's entered into. He might be a heavy eater, but I'm betting that he's also a leisurely eater most of the time, and competitive eating requires that one be able to eat a lot of food quickly. And I think it was Chef Boy-Ar-Dee that he ate on camera, which took him an unimpressive few minutes to finish.

 

[Mourning Dove]

Chris would gain even more weight than he already has. In between gorging themselves during a competition, professional eaters must exercise rigorously to lose the calories they consume during the competitions. Professional eaters must maintain a proper weight because any abdominal fat they have would constrict the stomach space they need to hold all the food they eat during the competitions.

 

[Arkangel]

Competitive eating requires much more training than most people think. Being able to put away large quantities of food in a short period of time isn't something that ANYONE can do, not even if you're obese. If Chris tried it, if his gag reflex doesn't kick in and vomit up everything, he'd possibly tear open his stomach and would need immediate medical attention.

 

[Jewelsmakerguy]

As others have said, it's pretty competitive (I'm simultaneously impressed and disgusted whenever I see one), and I can't see Chris being able to enter one, let alone win.

If anything, the likely result would be either or a ruptured stomach.

 

[Mr. 0]

The food would come to life and start playing "Choke the Autistic".

 

[timtommy]

"I do"

 

[Ghost Got Double Dipped]

He'd just whine on facebook about how God is in league with Mary Lee Walsh to keep Chris in his house and prevent him from having a sweetheart walk right into his front door.

 

[Big_Pete_33]

I asked this in random recently

I think he'd try to get a PS4 instead, not knowing how sponsorship works.

that's also true, although if he were to exchange it, i think he'd need a receipt which would most likely not be given to him if he "won" it
of course, i've never really won anything major in my life, so i might be wrong.

That's a good question, obviously a 75 year old woman getting her mourning coffee wouldn't care for an Xbox One. They probably don't give out receipts but that wouldn't stop someone from selling it. I'm sure Chris can go on craigslist with an unopened Xbox. He wouldn't get full price but if he was smart--never mind.

NO HAGGLING!

 

[Big_Pete_33]

Now I'm aware there's another topic about two Chrises but I'm talking about if Chris discovered a way to clone himself, and whether Chris wanted to or not, there's suddenly a major group of Chrises. Something like out of the Simpsons Halloween episode

Or in "Too Many Pinkie Pies" an episode of My Little Pony

One can imagine the horror of instead of chanting "Fun! Fun! Fun" it's "Troll! Troll! Troll!"

Or the echoing of and the stench of .

What would happen if such an event occur?