”Every time The Kiwi Farms gets caught trying to condemn children to a life of drugs, gangs, drinking, rape, incest, verbal abuse, physical abuse, and a number of other horrors, it promises it'll never do so again.”
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Forum guidelines
Be civil. Don't get angry over Chris. If you need to tell people you're better than someone, you're probably not.Limit discussion of body parts and functions. Chris is gross. Discussing his incontinence in detail is unnecessary and disturbing.Don't roleplay in your posts. Don't write pretend dialog between people, such as Chris and his mother. Avoid writing monologues, they're also dumb.Hide your powerlevel. Avoid revealing intimate, personal details about yourself in public boards. These threads are not your personal blog and we are not an asylum.No trolling plans. We are not an autistic Illuminati. If you embarrass yourself or the forum trying to troll, we will ridicule you.Write descriptive topic titles. "[14-Sep-2015] Facebook post about Sonichu" is better than "new update".Chris doesn't read your posts. Stop trying to directly, or indirectly, chastise Chris through your posts. He does not care about what you have to say, and these rants are boring.Don't post random articles. Unless the subject matter is directly related to Chris and his history, please do not post articles with a loose affiliation.
Talk to Staff
I have amazing taste
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
What if Chris got turned into a hedgehog ... with blue arms?
What if Chris got 1 billion dollars?
Charming Man
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
What if Chris got 1 billion dollars?
He'd spend 2 billion dollars on Lego.
I want blood!
kiwifarms.net
What if Chris shit his pants and the shit went back inside him?
Charming Man
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
What if Chris shit his pants and the shit went back inside him?
I want blood!
kiwifarms.net
What if Chris was a golfer?
Charming Man
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
What if Chris was a golfer?
He would have to wear plus forties.
I want blood!
kiwifarms.net
He would have to wear plus forties.
He'd put any girl in Third Hole. Bu-dmmm-tsssss
I have amazing taste
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
What if Chris got married to a cop?
What if Chris got married to a cop?
They'd live in jail.
What if Chris got a vision of his death at the hands of Clyde, Slaweel, Snyder and an army of Jerkops after making Sonic's arms legally blue in and tried to prevent this vision from happening?
What if Chris got locked in a homo bar for a week?
Huh. Oh yeah.
kiwifarms.net
What if Chris got locked in a homo bar for a week?
He would be in another place where people laugh at his back and pretend to like him for money and/or lulz,
What if Chris went to Japan?
I have amazing taste
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
What if Chris went to Japan?
He'd head to Shigeru Miyamoto's house and wouldn't stop bothering him about a Sonichu game.
What if Chris went to a casino?
What if Chris got beat up in an alley way somewhere and got so beat up he got sent to the hospital?
I want blood!
kiwifarms.net
What if Chris got beat up in an alley way somewhere and got so beat up he got sent to the hospital?
There'd be a smelly brown trail of so that trolls can follow him.
I have amazing taste
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
What if Chris went on a roadtrip to walley world?
I want blood!
kiwifarms.net
What if Chris went on a roadtrip to walley world?
He'd be a wally to do that.
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
What if Chris went on a roadtrip to walley world?
He'd put the 'poo' in National Lampoon. Because he shits himself. It's a poop joke, that's what we do here.
I want blood!
kiwifarms.net
What if Barb was the one who farted loudly in court during the recent hearing, not Chris?
🛟
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
What if Chris narrated a nature documentary?
Spoiler
>inb4 something about lesbian bonobos or lesbian lizards
