I guess it won't matter much. I doubt this thread will get much traffic. If anything, I could copy paste too.
I can't pull anything up anymore on him, because I have him blocked on everything, for good reason. He was the last boyfriend I dated, before I was diagnosed with autism by two psychyatrists. There would be a lot of times where I wouldn't get or catch what was going on because I wanted to do my own thing around my friends. This worsens with depression. And I really fell into depression. So much so, that any time I tried to talk to him about issues, he'd give me the all American response of "Oh well you can pull through. I have gone through a lot of shit and I'm just fine." Apply boot straps to boot and pull up.
I really couldn't. He'd never listen to me. I felt isolated, and he would gaslight me into thinking I was over reacting. I have had meltdowns before after a string of belittling statements and how I was acting irrational. Hell I remember one of our last arguments, involved me dropping my half full smoothie on the ground and just fucking going NUTS. And the first thing he said to me? "You wasted a perfectly good smoothie". He wasn't concerned I was having a panic attack. At all.
He'd always call me his "pretty little idiot". I have this thing where I can appear ditzy because of lack of awareness or self awareness. But once people get to know me, I'm pretty fucking sharp. Not tooting my own horn. It's what people have told me. I would constantly tell him to stop calling me that. And for a while, months after, I literally believed I was dumb. He also accused me of "emotionally cheating" on him with my best friend who also apparently has autism. He said hurtful things like "You're just using him as an emotional boyfriend", "He wants to fuck you." But really? He was the only one I felt I could talk to without him trying to make himself a victim. But even that didn't work.
So, one day, when he said he never wants to get married at all, it was the last straw. I dumped his ass while house sitting for my parents. He's caused me panic attacks before, after the break up, and the guy I was seeing at the time, had to calm me down. He would air out our dirty laundry to my horror. Made this whole smear campaign about how I cheated on him (he'd leave out the emotional bit to gain more sympathy), and I was kicked out of a thread we both frequented.
So yes. The absolute worst boyfriend I have ever had. I remind myself this because I never want to go through that emotional abuse again.
