Winter Survival

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WhiteKnight

kiwifarms.net
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Sep 9, 2013
I believe it is to be expected that a brutal winter season will affect most of the country this year. I wonder with the ever increasing deterioration of 14 BLC, how will Chris and Barb fare this season? I am wondering how they keep their house heated. I think the sheer mass of the horde will be a severe fire hazard. I can imagine Barb using a space heater and crashing into slumber, unknowingly burning the house (and our favorite autist) down.

How do they manage to habitate during the winter?
 
Like bears, they will bunker down in their nest of filth and sleep all winter, surviving off the fat stores they've painstakingly built up over a year of consuming Hungry Man dinners, Healthy McWraps and q-sands.
 
Ah, but this is where Barb is smarter than us. The hoard serves as a great insulator. Throw in a couple of beagle pup's body temperature and you've got yourself a sauna.
 
The only difference that winter brings to the Chandler household is that Chris is even more dangerous when behind the wheel.
 
The beagles are there as emergency rations, in case Chris and/or Barb rouse from their slumber before the spring thaw and are in need of a quick snack. Since the dogs are no doubt as fat and poorly exercised as their owners, their flesh should be tender and flavorful.
 
According to Wikipedia, the average temperature during the coldest months is like -3 Celsius. Not really that cold. An electric heater in their shared room should be enough, imho. And besides, when have we ever heard him bitch about being cold during those times?
 
Christ with that jungle outside imagine all the rats that will be in the hoard in the winter months.
 
NiggoFiggo said:
Christ with that jungle outside imagine all the rats that will be in the hoard in the winter months.
Click to expand...

> implying there were no rats in the hoard before
 
Brutal winter? I'm going skiing this February! AUGH YEAH

But Chris and Barb will survive. They live in an area that's used to wintery conditions and even Chris must be expected to shovel the snow (so you can FUNCTION)
 
TrippinKahlua said:
Brutal winter? I'm going skiing this February! AUGH YEAH

But Chris and Barb will survive. They live in an area that's used to wintery conditions and even Chris must be expected to shovel the snow (so you can FUNCTION)
Click to expand...

After seeing the state of their front yard, I kinda doubt that. Do you think we could get anyone to take some pics of the chander house in the snowy season?
 
random_pickle said:
TrippinKahlua said:
Brutal winter? I'm going skiing this February! AUGH YEAH

But Chris and Barb will survive. They live in an area that's used to wintery conditions and even Chris must be expected to shovel the snow (so you can FUNCTION)
Click to expand...

After seeing the state of their front yard, I kinda doubt that. Do you think we could get anyone to take some pics of the chander house in the snowy season?
Click to expand...


that's like trying to photograph hoth with chris as the wampa
 
I would love to see the Chandlers get a winter like we get up here. We can get like a foot of snow overnight, so it'd be hilarious to see Chris try to dig his car out of the snow to make q-sand runs.
 
CalmMyTits said:
I would love to see the Chandlers get a winter like we get up here. We can get like a foot of snow overnight, so it'd be hilarious to see Chris try to dig his car out of the snow to make q-sand runs.
Click to expand...

Same here, heck, we can sometimes get even more than that on particularly nasty winters.
 
If he gets snowed in, it'll just be:
"HELP! HELP! HELP!!!"

When no one comes he'll just tuck himself into his cleavage and wait for a thaw.
 
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