Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[Schmuck of Ages]

There's no way Jack has the attention span to meditate.

 

[rubytintedchix]

There's no way Jack has the attention span to meditate.

I sat quietly and listened to God. He told me that he often tells him to make double batches of things on purpose, like for example frosting fudge. #GodLaughs

 

[Archie_Kimkicker]

Imagine being such a retard that you get angry angy about the weather, something you can do literally nothing about. It's the definition of childishness. What a jackoff.

Sorry, you made a typo.

 

[Bisteca Toblerone]

Had a stomach virus for a few days and couldn't keep anything down. Watched some of Jack's videos and I think his videos successfully scared the illness out of me.

Then again, it was probably just the antivirals I took.

 

[AnOminous]

There's no way Jack has the attention span to meditate.

God told me that Jack Scalfani is an asshole who must die.

 

[captkrisma]

There's no way Jack has the attention span to meditate.

I listened to God and he told me to desecrate athe grave of John Lennon, showed me a book of matches and a rack of porno mags from a truck stop I had stopped into to get a soda.

When I get stopped I will simply say Jack Scalfani told me this is the proper way to listen to God.

EDIT: Guarantee this is related to the Sunday livestream now and how he couldn't control people chatting while the sermon is going on.

 

[Laughingjoke2]

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Did the Murder Church ban Chili from the Pot Lucks?

 

[GoodFattyDeadFatty]

What about the keto fudge and various other keto desserts he's made? Stupid mushbrain.

 

[Aaway]

so what happened to jack's big "new year's resolution" aka bringing back the live streams?

he only did the one a couple weeks ago on his personal FB and said he'd do it again in the group but we never got anything. i wonder if he knows there are trolls in the group and is hesitant to stream there because of that

 

[captkrisma]

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What about the keto fudge and various other keto desserts he's made? Stupid mushbrain.

Jack: Tiktok is the devil! Just full of lies and scams!

Also Jack: Look at this Keeeeeeeeeto pop tart I found on Tiktok!

 

[Cedric_Eff]

There's no way Jack has the attention span to meditate.

His view of God has to be the most stereotypical American thing ever.

 

[Skurtman]

What about the keto fudge and various other keto desserts he's made? Stupid mushbrain.

But that's different! You see, Jack (probably) doesn't like pop tarts so why in the world would anyone waste time creating a keto version of it? It doesn't make sense. When it comes to fudge and other stuff Jack likes, a keto version is cool because now Jack doesn't have to deprive himself! Jack truly is the center of everyones world with the gravitational pull he has amassed.

ETA: I give it two weeks until he makes a video where he tries this awesome new KETO pop tart recipe he found somewhere (absolutely not tiktok though)

 

[MasterDisaster]

There's no way Jack has the attention span to meditate.

Shut up and let god do the thinking sure sounds like something a jobless slob would say.
'I can't work a normal job, Tammy. God hasn't told me to yet!'

Also keto poptarts are redundant when Jack is gonna eat them a dozen at a time.

 

[Pig Cups]

He looks more stroked out and retarded in every single video, and his corpselike pallor is really taking off.

Yeah, he’s definitely looking more pallid with each passing upload. It reminds me of DeVito/Frank Reynolds in Always Sunny when he got his makeup done by a mortician to conceal his broken nose.

Jesus fucking Christ. I'm a true crime nut and I've seen husbands outright murdered for far less than what Jack does to Tammy. One day they're gonna find him in one of his smokers. Smart, too, since detectives using luminol won't find shit if it's burnt.

Maddeningly, that post is 100% real. He's actually been on a bit of a Tammy-burning bender this week. I don't think these have been posted before, so here's Exhibit 1 and 2 in Tammy's future defense case.

People have killed for less.

She does a remarkable job at swallowing and muffling the anger she feels towards this sack of shit she’s still chained to. At least from what we see of their onscreen interactions, Jack is a rage-inducing, relentlessly disrespectful turd. If she flipped out and pulled some Annie Wilkes-type (from the book, not the film) antics, like cutting off his stroke arm with an ax and cauterizing the stump with a blowtorch…who could blame her at that point?

 

[MasterDisaster]

Yeah, he’s definitely looking more pallid with each passing upload. It reminds me of DeVito/Frank Reynolds in Always Sunny when he got his makeup done by a mortician to conceal his broken nose.
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She does a remarkable job at swallowing and muffling the anger she feels towards this sack of shit she’s still chained to. At least from what we see of their onscreen interactions, Jack is a rage-inducing, relentlessly disrespectful turd. If she flipped out and pulled some Annie Wilkes-type (from the book, not the film) antics, like cutting off his stroke arm with an ax and cauterizing the stump with a blowtorch…who could blame her at that point?

If Jack's 'Valentine's Day Dinner' is any indication of his level of romance Tammy is certainly getting plenty of action on the side and who could blame her? I'd bet long before that arm went limpy his snausage had given up ever seeing the light of day again.

 

[JackIsBlack]

It is Scalfani-verse canon that Senior despises Poptards. In the Carls Jr/Hardee’s vs Burger King video he sees an advertisement on the window for a Poptart ice cream sandwich and says he would never try that because that’s disgusting.

 

[Aaway]

here's my latest cooking with jack video
it's called "stuff you probably don't want to eat"
it probably looks ghastly
i'm probably going to undercook the meat
and it's my excuse for a job that makes you no money
#desperatefame

 

[EvilDroid64]

here's my latest cooking with jack video
it's called "stuff you probably don't want to eat"
it probably looks ghastly
i'm probably going to undercook the meat
and it's my excuse for a job that makes you no money
#desperatefame

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Just uninstall it if you don't like it, you dumbass.

 

[Delilah Radio Show]

My god, this aged fat fuck is more obsessed with tik tok than anyone I know in the actual target demographic.

 

[Bisteca Toblerone]

Just uninstall it if you don't like it, you dumbass.

No see, that would be too easy for mushbrain to do. Instead he's going to bitch and moan on Facebook because he still thinks people give a shit what he thinks.

#GodLaughs and Jack is most certainly his favorite punchline.