Trashfire PPP: Pig's Passage to Portugal - Update 1/26 - Ralph got his ass kicked and murse stolen. Turns out, the citizens of Portugal are NOT big fans of the Killstream

[Chief Ungo Bungo]

A true Gunty King needs his crown!

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Full tweet:
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Who's "We"?
Diddler Dax fucked his ankle and Meigh is at home and it's sure as shit not Gator, so who is with Ralph?

 

[Slimy Time]

One of the biggest reasons for traveling is to go to the best places to eat in other countries.

It's Lisbon as well, it's not as if it's full of weird foreign cuisine that is utterly unpalatable to people. You want sandwiches, try the Bifana or Francesinha. Ok, maybe he skips on Bifanas, that's pork sandwiches, he might not want to become a cannibal just yet, but the other one is like a meat club sandwich, and they all Portuguese.

 

[Tiger Jack]

“HOLA AMIGO, I’LL HAVE DOS GRAN-DAY WHOPPER AND DOS GRAN-DAY FRIES, WITH AY GRAN-DAY DIET COKE POR FAY-VOR. AND CAHN I HAYVE ONE O DEM PAPER CROWNS TOO? SI, UNO CORONA? *joker laugh*”

“Senhor, por favor, mantenha sua voz baixa.”

”HAHA GRASSY-ASS AMIGO, YOU TOO. KILLSTREAM BABY! MUERTE ARROYO, WOO!”

 

[AltisticRight]

for the love of god just lie,

If I were some miserable minimum wage server and this blob of lard with a breath of used tampons waddles onto my premise, I'd be asking for physical proof of vaccination to make sure the restaurant is vaccinated against smelly hicks.

Edit: missed a word

 

[Polyboros2]

I should probably pay more attention to their monopoly money. What quantity of food did Andy buy? I can't remember the last time I ate at Burger King, but if he only got a single combo meal, $12 is pretty bad.

I stopped going to Burger King in Burgerland cause they were charging too much for shit food, It was like 8 bucks for the most basic Whopper combo, I can believe $12 10 years later for something with bacon and two patties.

Gondor doesn't stand a chanceView attachment 2914029

INB4 the "No man can kill me" tranny meme with Meigh.

Who's "We"?
Diddler Dax fucked his ankle and Meigh is at home and it's sure as shit not Gator, so who is with Ralph?

If we are lucky, an incognito kiwi that's actually from Spain claiming to be a native Portuguese Big Fan of the KillstreamTM.

Remember this was a money making endeavor for the Gunt. You gotta spend money to make money I think was a direct quote. I've been eagerly waiting for Ralph to do absolutely nothing that could even be argued to be of value from his perspective, and so far I have not been disappointed. He's just going to waddle around Portugal, not even have a good tourist experience, cringe post on Twitter thinking it's dunking on Andy(already done that in earnest), and eventually have to go back home to his sad life and the daunting cliff of future responsibility.

 

[UCantCCPMe]

Ralph's life is like one big Jeff Foxworthy "You might be a redneck" sketch.

If you travel to Portugal and eat Burger King, you might be a redneck.

 

[AnOminous]

It only violates the Mann Act if someone else is doing the transporting for that purpose. e.g. 16 year old that lives in South Lake Tahoe, CA walks across the border to South Lake Tahoe, NV to go bang someone, not a violation.

This is not correct, that's covered in "persuades, induces, entices, or coerces"

"Whoever knowingly persuades, induces, entices, or coerces any individual to travel in interstate or foreign commerce, or in any Territory or Possession of the United States, to engage in prostitution, or in any sexual activity for which any person can be charged with a criminal offense, or attempts to do so, shall be fined under this title or imprisoned not more than 20 years, or both." 18 U.S.C. § 2422(a).

This has been interpreted so broadly it includes adultery by a married person.

More importantly, it specifically includes 18 year olds.

"Whoever, using the mail or any facility or means of interstate or foreign commerce, or within the special maritime and territorial jurisdiction of the United States knowingly persuades, induces, entices, or coerces any individual who has not attained the age of 18 years, to engage in prostitution or any sexual activity for which any person can be charged with a criminal offense, or attempts to do so, shall be fined under this title and imprisoned not less than 10 years or for life." 18 U.S.C. § 2422(b).

Mere persuasion of someone under 18 is sufficient to invoke the Mann Act. It also invokes the "special maritime and territorial jurisdiction" that is covered under the federal sex tourism law.

There are technicalities of such prosecutions that allow some people through the cracks, but if you're traveling anywhere, or soliciting anyone to travel where you are, to commit some sex act that would be illegal anywhere that has jurisdiction over it, and it involves anyone under 18, you are rolling the dice. Bigtime.

 

[Haesindang Park]

He's just going to waddle around Portugal, not even have a good tourist experience, cringe post on Twitter thinking it's dunking on Andy(already done that in earnest), and eventually have to go back home to his sad life and the daunting cliff of future responsibility.

Guess he's not going to bother walking up the streets of Porto to eat some francesinha to fill his gunt with.

 

[Image Reactions]

 

[Ralph Barnhardt]

Ralph's life is like one big Jeff Foxworthy "You might be a redneck" sketch.

If you travel to Portugal and eat Burger King, you might be a redneck.

If you use the money that you set aside to get custody of your first born to fly across the Atlantic just to maybe piss off some guy who talked to another guy you don't like, you might be Ethan Ralph.

 

[AnOminous]

What an absolute disgrace to humanity.

This is why when foreigners trash America in front of me I just claim to be Canadian because there's no way to defend this as even human behavior. When we send these subhuman apes abroad, we aren't sending our best. Sad. Many such cases.

 

[Yellow Yam Scam]

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is there a full version of whatever awfulness this is?

 

[AnOminous]

Everybody's so interested in how Portugal is going to treat him during his stay. I'm much more interested in how US Customs and Border Patrol are going to treat him upon his return. Shaolin Shakes-related chicanery aside, he's on a suspended sentence and traveling alone to a drug haven country with lax drug laws that's also known for sex trafficking. That could be a very fun conversation.


Dude, the Airbus A32x series doesn't fuck around. They're not Boeing planes -- these actually stay in the air, even with unbalanced loads like this one experienced with the pig strapped to a seat instead of straddling the aisle.

They could have put some lead blocks on the seat opposite to the Gunt and charged him for the extra seat.

 

[Image Reactions]

is there a full version of whatever awfulness this is?

 

[GuntPunt]

“HOLA AMIGO, I’LL HAVE DOS GRAN-DAY WHOPPER AND DOS GRAN-DAY FRIES, WITH AY GRAN-DAY DIET COKE POR FAY-VOR. AND CAHN I HAYVE ONE O DEM PAPER CROWNS TOO? SI, UNO CORONA? *joker laugh*”

“Senhor, por favor, mantenha sua voz baixa.”

”HAHA GRASSY-ASS AMIGO, YOU TOO. KILLSTREAM BABY! MUERTE ARROYO, WOO!”

Don't be ridiculous.

European servings are much smaller so Gunty is going to order a lot more than that.

 

[kaien]

It's Lisbon as well, it's not as if it's full of weird foreign cuisine that is utterly unpalatable to people. You want sandwiches, try the Bifana or Francesinha. Ok, maybe he skips on Bifanas, that's pork sandwiches, he might not want to become a cannibal just yet, but the other one is like a meat club sandwich, and they all Portuguese.

In the era of smartphones and Google Maps ignorance isn't even an excuse anymore. In the pre-internet past you could kinda sorta justify eating franchise food abroad because you're in an unfamiliar place with an unfamiliar language and you're not sure where to go or what to get. But nowadays you can poke your phone for two seconds and get directions to the best of everything instantly in any foreign city. Google Lens will even translate the goddam menu for you. Eating Burger King in America is a questionable decision. Eating it in a foreign country is an action that calls for institutionalization.

 

[DragoonSierra]

Oh god hes wearing it like Madcucks but unironically

 

[Capt. Jean Luc Ritard]

Asperger King

 

[thismanlies]

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Damn Ralph, that cardboard Burger King crown was so pathetic. PPP's crown is way better and it makes him look like a right and proper king.

 

[Blewberry Nausea]

This is the douchebag that gives American tourists a bad name.