- Joined
- Jun 12, 2020
Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental
- Thread starter Gentlebastard
- Start date
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🔧 At about Midnight EST I am going to completely fuck up the site trying to fix something.
Schmuck of Ages
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Feb 3, 2021
"This is the first time something looks as good as the picture"-shows off greasy ass mess. Also who thinks Buffalo Wild Wings is a young kids place? It's peak boomer food.
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- Joined
- Dec 4, 2013
One more for the soyface collection
captkrisma
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Feb 3, 2013
I like how Jack snaps at Tammy for moving his plate once the food is in front of him, like the fucking dog that he is.
Aaway
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Sep 8, 2016
"i'm so proud of them for making the burger just like how it looks in the picture" (it doesn't look anything like the picture)
and later
"so much excitement guys"
it's fucking BWW you boomer. i'm curious how a 1k calorie burger with fries and two buffalo chicken flatbreads fits into their profile by sanford plan?
- Joined
- Nov 1, 2021
To accelerate his death
- Joined
- Jul 18, 2018
I sure could go for some B-Dubs right now. Thanks Jack!
- Joined
- Dec 11, 2013
Well you know what they say about fools and money, I get the desire to splurge on something but it's a fucking car. It's purpose is to get you from point A to point B. If you don't do your research, check the insurance, check the reliability and do simple maintenance on it you're going to start bleeding money really soon and that dream car will become your most hated possession.
Jr is exactly the person that will prioritize how the car looks over everything else. Buying a new car is one of the worst decisions anybody can make unless they either have the money to burn or they don't care about anything else other than how it looks.
Babish OWNS his mistakes. And he will continually do and redo a recipe until he either gets it right or admits he can't do it properly.
Binging with Babish: Kung Pao Chicken from Seinfeld
Order the Babish Wok right here! https://amzn.to/2XXLpNOThis week, we're returning to the fictional land of New York City, where a sweating George Costanza p...youtu.be
This is how you do a video of you fucking up a dish and the process of correction.
Also lol at 3:18
His Ube roll from Stephen Universe is an example of him trying and failing repeatedly before getting it.
Mushbrain would call the first one perfect and then move on to the next recipe. So long as it's food and he can eat it he's happy.
He's stupid and lazy and doesn't understand that you can use a garlic and onion powder for that but not that dried stuff. It's not the same thing. But his only thought is, food goes in here pointing at his mouth.
Nah. It's because she lipped off to him one too many times and in his roid rage Jr. decked her and she's told everybody that her shiner is from walking into a door. She would have gone to the cops but the Murderchurch says this needs to be between her, Jr and Jesus and nobody else.
You know that girl has bruises all over her body from Jr. smacking her around.
How do you think he got to be morbidly obese and diabetic to begin with? He had six bags of normal chocolate chips which he would just snack on. Now that he's morbidly obese and diabetic instead of changing his diet or trying to work on it he just buys the sugar free stuff because he's an addict.
Charlie Delicious
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Mar 31, 2017
"that's true flatbread right there. Not artisan. Flatbread"
Wtf does that even mean?
Wtf does that even mean?
- Joined
- Dec 11, 2013
Dunno. He's trying to sound like he knows the difference between flatbread and "artisan" flatbread.
Or maybe he's just sick of the word "artisan" being slapped on everything nowadays.
- Joined
- May 27, 2019
Entire breaded chicken nuggets on a thin little flat bread just looks fucking weird to me. It's architecturally unsound.
Also Jesus Christ, a brisket borger, fries, and two flatbreads - WITH fried chicken as a toppping. I couldn't pull up flatbread info even when I switched my location to Jack's. Not even after a google search. I think Tammy said something about it being a test store and how she was excited that b-dubs was gonna start having it.
Per b-dubs's own website,* the burger & fries (small) are 1860 calories, can't find anything on the flatbreads obviously. In my previous life, most flatbreads were approx 130 cal/slice, so 1040 calories per a simple pepperoni flatbread. Unfortunately that doesn't include all the dressings and toppings and fried chicken chunks b-dubs hooked him up with, so let's put those flatbreads at, I dunno, 200–250 calories per? That's 1600–2000 calories.
Assuming they split all the food down the middle, if we add that all up, we get a grand total of.......................2 fatasses that are really fucking fat. Tammy looks happy at least.
"I'm so proud of them."
- Joined
- Feb 1, 2021
I'm probably way more salty about his prior vid when he said "I don't want to go out and pay $20 for ribs" than I should be, but it has inspired me to check his spending on his JOTG vids. I can't do the pizzas obviously, but look at this fucking shit.
That is JUST the burger and fries in his area. Assuming those flatbreads are around $12 and 1500 calories that meals cost him nearly $40 and was ~5000 calories split between two people. $40 for a pile of nasty ass greasy carbs.
BuT tWeNtY dOlLaRs FoR rIbS iS oUtRaGeOuS. Stroke 4(?) can't come soon enough, die Jack.
EDIT: Son of a bitch I got Ninja'd
Learn how to spell basic words before you think you're better than everyone else. Why the fuck are you even still alive? Just stop.
Hungry Homeless Handjob
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Jul 31, 2021
Playback speed x0.25 at 3:38 for your daily dose of cosmic horror.
- Joined
- Jun 12, 2020
My favorite part about the video (other than Jack snapping at Tammy) was how they compared it to Panera bread complete with the cost. How much do these landwhales eat at Panera bread that they have the prices memorized?
2? 3 times a week?
2? 3 times a week?
- Joined
- Sep 25, 2021
In this episode, Chef Scalfani receives the latest report from his industry insiders. He discovers that Buffalo Wild Wings is adding a new item to their menu. He leaps into action and gets his mommy wife to drive him to review it as soon as she's done folding the laundry.
As Jack approaches Buffalo Wild Wings he warns against potential scam artists trying to lure people in with promises of bacon, when really they will only be getting brisket. So watch out people! The food industry is trying to blur the lines between bacon and brisket so be careful when ordering bacon or brisket-related menu items.
Jack says: "I really like what Buffalo Wild Wings is doing." Ever a pillar of civilization, what they do at Buffalo Wild Wings pushes us all towards a brighter tomorrow.
As Jack sits down at the table he is stunned to find that there is a new buffalo boneless pizzafrom a promotional card on the table err, Jack already knew about this item from his industry insiders but thought this played better to the camera.
Jack totally doesn't fuck up his line at all by calling the item a sandwich and it's definitely Tammy's fault that she points him to the sandwich on the menu instead of the burger .Tammy eventually finds the burger on the menu for Jack because he's unable to find an item on a menu on his own like a grown man. Tammy doesn't listen to direction and Jack has to cut ahead to when Tammy both of them are able to find the Burger he was looking for.
Jack regales us with the time he was at the grocery store earlier. There were people everywhere. "It was crazy!" he exclaims. Jack is sick of hearing about people needing things likebread and milk wait no they need: milk and bread no maybe it's milk sandwiches? Who cares, you can just get your mommy wife go shopping for you so there's really no reason to know common household ingredients. People should just let their mommy wives do the shopping and stop joking about lack of access to food.
Tammy tries to rotate the burger to give the audience a better view . Tammy aggressively tries to steal Jacks burger and eat it for herself! Jack righteously crushes this rebellion and the burger is saved!
The Burger looks like it's designed to appeal to drunken fatasses like Jack exactly the way that it does in the picture!. Jack is so proud of his son Buffalo Wild Wings he awards them the illustrious A+ award of the Jack on the Go Show. A feat many before have tried to achieve but fell by the wayside, unworthy.
As Jack approaches Buffalo Wild Wings he warns against potential scam artists trying to lure people in with promises of bacon, when really they will only be getting brisket. So watch out people! The food industry is trying to blur the lines between bacon and brisket so be careful when ordering bacon or brisket-related menu items.
Jack says: "I really like what Buffalo Wild Wings is doing." Ever a pillar of civilization, what they do at Buffalo Wild Wings pushes us all towards a brighter tomorrow.
As Jack sits down at the table he is stunned to find that there is a new buffalo boneless pizza
Jack totally doesn't fuck up his line at all by calling the item a sandwich and it's definitely Tammy's fault that she points him to the sandwich on the menu instead of the burger .
Jack regales us with the time he was at the grocery store earlier. There were people everywhere. "It was crazy!" he exclaims. Jack is sick of hearing about people needing things like
The Burger looks
Holy shit, I was right! BWW can literally summon Jack.
They've got their fingers on the pulse of morbid obesity.
Jack must obey the table placards! He says "both" but he's ordering three things.
The "It never looks like the picture" is one of his classic bitch academy responses.
Skwisgaar, we don't know if it's laziness or lack of function, but Jack has been forcing Tammy to operate the menu for a while now.
They've got their fingers on the pulse of morbid obesity.
Jack must obey the table placards! He says "both" but he's ordering three things.
The "It never looks like the picture" is one of his classic bitch academy responses.
Skwisgaar, we don't know if it's laziness or lack of function, but Jack has been forcing Tammy to operate the menu for a while now.
- Joined
- Sep 25, 2021
I don't doubt Jack relies on mommy wife for most things, I just wanted to point out that Jack tried to play it off like he 'helped' Tammy find the item on the menu. This is pathetic in it's own right but
In reality you can actually hear Tammy saying she found it but Jack makes a pathetic attempt to hide this by cutting ahead to himself saying: "We both found it"
Schmuck of Ages
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Feb 3, 2021
captkrisma
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Feb 3, 2013
Uh-oh...maybe /Paul backtraced @rubytintedchix !