Careercow Brandon "Bam" Margera - From Jackass to Lolcow

Hot take, but I have no sympathy for people who drink and drive. It is a tragedy when anyone dies, but for fucks sake, Dunn was a millionaire, he could have called a taxi. I am sad he is dead, but it is his own damn fault.
Drunk drivers should get the death penalty. Like pedophiles, their brains cannot be trusted; they inhabit a different mental world where "drive drunk" is a possible action, and will be as long as they have a pulse.
 
Drunk drivers should get the death penalty. Like pedophiles, their brains cannot be trusted; they inhabit a different mental world where "drive drunk" is a possible action, and will be as long as they have a pulse.
I don't go that far with it, a lot of people do change. They can easily be incapacitated by revoking their license to drive a car and seizing their cars. Most of them don't have it in them to commit grand theft auto. The main issue is their lack of empathy for others.
There are solutions to DUI as the vast majority of DUIs are first time DUI offenders.
  1. Demand bars close at a certain time so that cops can be ready
  2. Ad campaigns do work, let people know the dangers of DUI and the possible penalties
  3. when not in use, cop cars can be parked near bar parking lots, signalling to people that cops are out
  4. Take the licenses of those with a certain number of DUIs.
  5. Figure out why each person drank and drove through a classification system and attempt to tailor a rehabilitative and punitive solution to their problems
    1. Was this a drunk college kid?
    2. Was this an addict?
    3. Was this a psychopath?
    4. Was this someone who is low IQ?
We can't execute people for first time misdemeanors, but we can hold them responsible while attempting to change their behavior.

That being said, the average drunk driver will drink and drive an insane amount of times before they are caught, but you can only punish people when you catch them.
 
  1. Figure out why each person drank and drove through a classification system and attempt to tailor a rehabilitative and punitive solution to their problems
    1. Was this a drunk college kid?
    2. Was this an addict?
    3. Was this a psychopath?
    4. Was this someone who is low IQ?
I've been all four of those things and never got behind the wheel while pissed.
 
I don't go that far with it, a lot of people do change. They can easily be incapacitated by revoking their license to drive a car and seizing their cars. Most of them don't have it in them to commit grand theft auto. The main issue is their lack of empathy for others.
There are solutions to DUI as the vast majority of DUIs are first time DUI offenders.
  1. Demand bars close at a certain time so that cops can be ready
  2. Ad campaigns do work, let people know the dangers of DUI and the possible penalties
  3. when not in use, cop cars can be parked near bar parking lots, signalling to people that cops are out
  4. Take the licenses of those with a certain number of DUIs.
  5. Figure out why each person drank and drove through a classification system and attempt to tailor a rehabilitative and punitive solution to their problems
    1. Was this a drunk college kid?
    2. Was this an addict?
    3. Was this a psychopath?
    4. Was this someone who is low IQ?
We can't execute people for first time misdemeanors, but we can hold them responsible while attempting to change their behavior.

That being said, the average drunk driver will drink and drive an insane amount of times before they are caught, but you can only punish people when you catch them.
Pretty much 100% of all serious accidents and injuries occur at a much higher BAC than the current legal limit in the US of 0.08. That's why current law has much more serious penalties if you're over 0.17. My solution would be to just raise the legal limit a bit to the 0.10 it used to be but severely punish those who are over that or are in fact clearly impaired.

That gets rid of the bullshit money-making cases which are the majority of them these days and focuses on the real danger. Nobody seriously wants to enforce the law or protect people because it's simply too profitable to really stop the problem.

It would be interesting to see the enforcement priorities if all fines were replaced with jail time.
 
This IG post was taken from the article:
1662575083571.png
This was the thumbnail of Bam leaving the bar, obviously same woman:
1662576276938.png
It blows my mind that the guy who got Jessica Simpson to cheat during marriage is now banging bottom shelf Florida bar skanks like this:

1662576911630.png
It's sad, last night was probably the greatest night of that woman's night.
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: Drowningman
I started skateboarding again and on a whim decided to look up Bam decks and searched his name here on a whim. I've been out of the subculture for so long but damn, this fall from grace is horrible.

Bam was the absolute coolest dude in the world when my friends and I were growing up. He was also legit a skate prodigy. He would see a trick, practice it for 5 minutes and then do it perfectly. In the early 2000's, Bam, his style and CKY were the cool things to be into. I can't stress how influential he was to a lot of people in my circles. You were either more a traditionalist or you were part of the Bam-era new breed.

I hope he finds peace, but he'll probably just OD in a Michigan bathroom or something.
 
I started skateboarding again and on a whim decided to look up Bam decks and searched his name here on a whim. I've been out of the subculture for so long but damn, this fall from grace is horrible.

Bam was the absolute coolest dude in the world when my friends and I were growing up. He was also legit a skate prodigy. He would see a trick, practice it for 5 minutes and then do it perfectly. In the early 2000's, Bam, his style and CKY were the cool things to be into. I can't stress how influential he was to a lot of people in my circles. You were either more a traditionalist or you were part of the Bam-era new breed.

I hope he finds peace, but he'll probably just OD in a Michigan bathroom or something.
It's all his own fault also. He cant for the life of him not be his own worst enemy. I don't in the slightest understand how that happens but it is what it is. The man had his wife/kid dangled infront of him and it did nothing to motivate him to stay clean. Not even a slight inclination to do so. When you do that no one anywhere can be sorry for you.
 
The man had his wife/kid dangled infront of him and it did nothing to motivate him to stay clean. Not even a slight inclination to do so. When you do that no one anywhere can be sorry for you.
RE: his kid/wife situation if I had to try and guess his logic I'd say it goes back to the fact that Bam has only experienced 2 serious incidents of being told NO and being unable to bullshit/bribe his way out of it. The first was when Dunn died and the second time was being fired from the Jackass crew.
Bam was told over and over again he couldn't drink, couldn't do drugs, and had to behave in preparation for being involved in Jackass Forever.
Even signed a piece of paper that acknowledged this.
Yet sure enough, less than a year later they he "finds one adderall pill on the floorboard of his car while on a road trip" and even though he didn't have a prescription for it he basically had no choice in the matter because "I was on a road trip and was tired".
Of course the retard ate it, and that's if there was ever an adderall pill to begin with, adderall is so similar to meth that lower end drug tests will see them both as the same thing. The man knows no real consequences apart from his best friend dying and now this. Sure he ruined the best relationship he ever had with Jenn Rivell and countless others after that but until his recent years women were a dime a dozen. If he lowers his standard he can probably still walk into any bar in America and on any given night he'll find a woman to take him home, give him beer, drugs, and pussy and let him sleep it off. He's had enough attention from women in his life that he has a story he tells over and over about how he got raped by a fat girl while passed out in a hotel room and also the infamous story of a woman who showed up on his doorstep with all her belongings and declared she was there to marry Bam. 8 months later Bam was woken in the middle of the night by the same woman who was naked, allegedly masturbating, and kissing his neck and had apparently been living in the treehouse they built for Viva La Bam and immediately forgot about.
He was probably reminded regularly of his sobriety obligations to Jackass by his friends but sure enough when he got 86'd out of production i imagine he looked like the surprised Pikachu meme.
1662978432813.png
I'm picturing the same fucking thing in play here. Bam's wife ( who turns out, was never legally married to Bam in the United States because they were married overseas and never bothered filing paperwork in the states) was guilty for years of enabling and supporting his habits, she clearly drank while pregnant (and honestly if I were Bam I'd get a paternity test because that kid looks nothing like him) and then continued to enable him until she got sick of being a single mother to 2 children and went into hiding. I can easily imagine that when she finally had enough it didn't happen overnight; she warned him and warned him and warned him some more and then set a final date before she finally did. Bam, in typical fat retard fashion probably legitimately believed that she couldn't do that because he probably can't even fathom the idea that any court system in the US will heavily favor Nikki and Phoenix over Bamuel Margarine and his MTV-sponsored IRL meth goblin reality show. Even if they aren't legally married, as long as Nikki can prove that his kid then she will be set for life.
At this point I'm waiting for the news he's dead or in jail on serious charges. I think he wants to die. I think deep down he knows what a shitbag he really is and he hates himself for it. I think every time he parties he pushes it to the limit and rolls the dice knowing that he might not wake up. And he probably thinks it badass and not pathetic at all to die flat on your back choking on your vomit while a bunch of middle aged juggalos are laughing at you and taking video to sell to TMZ. And speaking of, vinny has entered the chat:1662981607680.png
1662981723731.png
1662981896613.png
 
RE: his kid/wife situation if I had to try and guess his logic I'd say it goes back to the fact that Bam has only experienced 2 serious incidents of being told NO and being unable to bullshit/bribe his way out of it. The first was when Dunn died and the second time was being fired from the Jackass crew.
Bam was told over and over again he couldn't drink, couldn't do drugs, and had to behave in preparation for being involved in Jackass Forever.
Even signed a piece of paper that acknowledged this.
Yet sure enough, less than a year later they he "finds one adderall pill on the floorboard of his car while on a road trip" and even though he didn't have a prescription for it he basically had no choice in the matter because "I was on a road trip and was tired".
Of course the retard ate it, and that's if there was ever an adderall pill to begin with, adderall is so similar to meth that lower end drug tests will see them both as the same thing. The man knows no real consequences apart from his best friend dying and now this. Sure he ruined the best relationship he ever had with Jenn Rivell and countless others after that but until his recent years women were a dime a dozen. If he lowers his standard he can probably still walk into any bar in America and on any given night he'll find a woman to take him home, give him beer, drugs, and pussy and let him sleep it off. He's had enough attention from women in his life that he has a story he tells over and over about how he got raped by a fat girl while passed out in a hotel room and also the infamous story of a woman who showed up on his doorstep with all her belongings and declared she was there to marry Bam. 8 months later Bam was woken in the middle of the night by the same woman who was naked, allegedly masturbating, and kissing his neck and had apparently been living in the treehouse they built for Viva La Bam and immediately forgot about.
He was probably reminded regularly of his sobriety obligations to Jackass by his friends but sure enough when he got 86'd out of production i imagine he looked like the surprised Pikachu meme.
View attachment 3690287
I'm picturing the same fucking thing in play here. Bam's wife ( who turns out, was never legally married to Bam in the United States because they were married overseas and never bothered filing paperwork in the states) was guilty for years of enabling and supporting his habits, she clearly drank while pregnant (and honestly if I were Bam I'd get a paternity test because that kid looks nothing like him) and then continued to enable him until she got sick of being a single mother to 2 children and went into hiding. I can easily imagine that when she finally had enough it didn't happen overnight; she warned him and warned him and warned him some more and then set a final date before she finally did. Bam, in typical fat retard fashion probably legitimately believed that she couldn't do that because he probably can't even fathom the idea that any court system in the US will heavily favor Nikki and Phoenix over Bamuel Margarine and his MTV-sponsored IRL meth goblin reality show. Even if they aren't legally married, as long as Nikki can prove that his kid then she will be set for life.
At this point I'm waiting for the news he's dead or in jail on serious charges. I think he wants to die. I think deep down he knows what a shitbag he really is and he hates himself for it. I think every time he parties he pushes it to the limit and rolls the dice knowing that he might not wake up. And he probably thinks it badass and not pathetic at all to die flat on your back choking on your vomit while a bunch of middle aged juggalos are laughing at you and taking video to sell to TMZ. And speaking of, vinny has entered the chat:View attachment 3690318
View attachment 3690319
View attachment 3690320

I Couldn't have said it better myself.
This guy is a trainwreck who cannot for the life of him understand consequences.
 
How dare you - Elvis was a Vietnam veteran with a beautiful voice without whom rock music as we know it would not exist. Bam's a methamphetamine addict who had above-average hand-eye coordination twenty years ago.
elvis married jailbait, was a mere pop singer when he started out like pat boone, and died sucking on the toilet after one too many barbituates (and was younger than bam when he did so)
 
Back