- Joined
- Jan 16, 2017
Pretty sure the going rate to buy a congressman is more than a million bucks Lucas.
Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks
- Thread starter SpacePanther
- Start date
-
🐕 I am attempting to get the site runnning as fast as possible. If you are experiencing slow page load times, please report it.
- Joined
- Aug 9, 2020
I was going to make a point about how comical it is that he thinks he could figure out how to become leader of the free world when he can't even figure out how to talk to a woman, but hell if John Fetterman can get elected into office dressed like a bum and unable to speak a single coherent sentence then Lucas might actually have a shot.
Last edited:
- Joined
- Jun 20, 2019
I’ve been a Wernologist for over half a decade now, and this is the first of Luke’s word salads that I wasn’t able to finish.
It’s just too much…
It’s just too much…
WonderWino
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Dec 17, 2019
So I dug around in his redbubble store and noticed a few things
Perfect for lucas to use when going to his local starbucks to creep on zoomer baes. Its so stretched out it looks like he's melting
Lucas's face on a pair of socks. This one is strangely appropriate for something sold by lucas. It fits his insanity rather well when you think about it. His face on one sock and an entirely different design on the other, reflective of his broken brain. I also like his the heel is directly over his nose
Imagine walking into someones bedroom and seeing their bed looking like this, with stretched out, bloated, horribly photoshopped lucas's face. Doubly so if you're a woman. Not to mention if lucas has the audacity to use his own merchandise he would scream narcissism to have his face all over everything like that, especially his own bed
For someone who despises 'flatbills' and 'flatbill clones' lucas sure likes selling flatbill hats with his own picture on them. Creepy pictures of him at that. I like how it just says 'a bae' cause the rest got cut off by the design limits. Its nonsensical in that context. and fucking lol at the styles being listed as 'baseball cap' and 'dad hat'
What the fuck is a 'dad hat' exactly
This is what has me convinced I was right about whoever is helping him deliberately doing the stupidest shit possible to make lucas look like an even bigger idiot. Lucas gets ridiculed by that right now stuff all the time, no way he'd put it on posters and tshirts like that. The fact he has 'dad hats' and flatbill hats at all on there leans heavily in that direction as well. Of course lucas just leaves it to somebody else and doesn't realize how stupid such things make him look
and that political word salad is even more insane than his previous direct democracy hot takes. The meds he's on, assuming he's taking them, clearly aren't helping the crazy
Perfect for lucas to use when going to his local starbucks to creep on zoomer baes. Its so stretched out it looks like he's melting
Lucas's face on a pair of socks. This one is strangely appropriate for something sold by lucas. It fits his insanity rather well when you think about it. His face on one sock and an entirely different design on the other, reflective of his broken brain. I also like his the heel is directly over his nose
Imagine walking into someones bedroom and seeing their bed looking like this, with stretched out, bloated, horribly photoshopped lucas's face. Doubly so if you're a woman. Not to mention if lucas has the audacity to use his own merchandise he would scream narcissism to have his face all over everything like that, especially his own bed
For someone who despises 'flatbills' and 'flatbill clones' lucas sure likes selling flatbill hats with his own picture on them. Creepy pictures of him at that. I like how it just says 'a bae' cause the rest got cut off by the design limits. Its nonsensical in that context. and fucking lol at the styles being listed as 'baseball cap' and 'dad hat'
What the fuck is a 'dad hat' exactly
This is what has me convinced I was right about whoever is helping him deliberately doing the stupidest shit possible to make lucas look like an even bigger idiot. Lucas gets ridiculed by that right now stuff all the time, no way he'd put it on posters and tshirts like that. The fact he has 'dad hats' and flatbill hats at all on there leans heavily in that direction as well. Of course lucas just leaves it to somebody else and doesn't realize how stupid such things make him look
and that political word salad is even more insane than his previous direct democracy hot takes. The meds he's on, assuming he's taking them, clearly aren't helping the crazy
- Joined
- Apr 28, 2015
That bedspread is going to haunt my nightmares.
- Joined
- Jul 24, 2019
This is beyond delusional or even self-parody. This is some twisted Baudrillarian Hyperreality shit that could only exist in the 21st century.
Ex-homeless, dying, obese schizo-effective bipolar mental case on the government dole who haunted the streets of some small Washington city hunting for young girls has now merchandised his internet persona, of which he had no control over or even want to exist, in order to fleece a couple shekels from people globally who gawk at watching the car crash of his life, and of which he believes are his “fans”, so he can buy some sushi a couple times a month.
Seriously. There isn’t a word for this spectacle.
- Joined
- Aug 1, 2018
It's worth noting that Lucas thinks that by selling one t-shirt and one mug that gets him over the $20 threshold for a payout.
I sell merch on StreamElements and they let you set your profit margin, setting it at $5 puts the price for a t-shirt at $20.60, and for an $11 mug I get $2.50 to keep down costs.
That's $7.50 profit for both items, at this rate Lucas would have to sell his t-shirts at $30.60 and mugs at $13.50 to reach $20 profit for both. Quite a markup, to put it mildly.
Either that or he thinks the customers just pay Lucas directly and redbubble just sends them the items out of the goodness of their hearts? Wouldn't put it past him....
Last edited:
Stinkyboy
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- May 22, 2021
The filtre he’s using makes his eyes look like women’s eyes
Al from Dadeville
Please expect my motion for sanctions forthvoming.
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Jul 20, 2019
He’s still posting food. Looks like he’s proud that he made chicky nuggies. Looks like someone might have given him homemade pickles. Does he visit a food bank?
Tbh these aren’t as horrifying *only* because he does have the food separated instead of all mixed together in a slop bucket as usual
Tbh these aren’t as horrifying *only* because he does have the food separated instead of all mixed together in a slop bucket as usual
- Joined
- Apr 28, 2015
When is he going to give up on trying to culinary a woman on to his dick, like he did with science?
Al from Dadeville
Please expect my motion for sanctions forthvoming.
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Jul 20, 2019
We missed a few things in the past week
(You HAVE to watch it with the sound on)The caption for that one was plenty good:
On a lighter note, check out Beetus-Hand Luke
And the cherry on top was a hot take about 18-year olds.
WonderWino
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Dec 17, 2019
I have a funny feeling that the mentality that drove him to create that insane storefront is the same one that he has used to convince himself that he can legitimately charge $20 to unblock or accept friend requests. He thinks his 'enemies' care enough about such things that he can repeatedly milk them for money just to interact with him, and he thinks he's being clever for thinking that. In other words its some form of 'make people who hate me pay me to interact with me to own the republicans!' it makes alot of sense with lucas's broken brained thought processes
He's talking and acting like a literal child. Bragging about making your own food, especially something as bizarre and disgusting looking as that is exactly the kind of thing a five year old does who just figured out how to use a microwave to heat up frozen foodTelo Miriam said:
Even the food looks like something an autistic child would make and brag about. Sliced pickles, slices of cheese, tomato, chicken nuggets and CORN NUTS of all things? That has all the weird texture markings of literal autistic food. Who puts corn nuts on a plate as part of a meal and thinks thats something that should be shown off? and why the fuck does he put corn nuts in everything? Also that broccoli doesn't look cooked at all and putting olives in there is just weird
He sounds like he can barely breathe in that clip, like somebody with a bee allergy who just got stung and is starting to suffocate. No way that isn't obesity related. After all he can barely do anything or walk a few feet without having to huff and puff like darth vaderTelo Miriam said:We missed a few things in the past week
The caption for that one was plenty good:
He shows how much of an idiot he truly is by celebrating his blood sugar coming down (yeah sure it did lucas, not with what you've been posting as 'food') and stuffing himself with all the sugar he can get his hands on, sending it right back to where it was or higher. As a diabetic he should know that this is exactly what he should NOT be doing. Blood sugar spikes like that can cause serious problems. The whole point is to get it down and keep it down. He's doing exactly what I said he would with the calories and shit - 'oh I have to cut down on sugar? I guess that means more spare calories to add fat and carbs!' he's proving how little he understands how healthy diets work. He literally sees it as cutting out one thing so he can add more of something else. No fucking wonder he's over 300lb now
and 18 year olds are very much children, but thats irrelevant because nobody brought up 18 year olds, everybody knows he uses that as a screen and is talking about 16 year olds and does it because he thinks he's being clever and not able to get called out for it or get into trouble.
Fucking lol about how he thinks eating the garbage he posts is 'working on his weight' I mean who looks at their dinner plate, says 'I need to lose some weight' and then says 'you know what this meal needs? a cup of corn nuts and lots of mayo!'
and that reminds me, since he likes putting stuff on tshirts maybe he should put that convo between him and that 15 year old he tried to groom with a burrito on a shirt, or the one about soliciting nudes from a 17 year old even after she told him it was illegal. Can you imagine lucas's reaction if he was walking down the street and saw somebody wearing a tshirt with his face on it and a screenshot of him admitting to grooming a minor with a burrito, soliciting kiddie porn or the famous admission of being a pedo on his fb page? He's go fucking nuts on whoever was wearing it
Kinda makes me a bit surprised nobody is fucking him by opening up a parody store with that stuff on tshirts
Stinkyboy
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- May 22, 2021
Down 20 points…. So, he’s dead two ways?
neutral grandpa
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Jun 14, 2020
you just know that if Lucas is admitting to weighing 300 pounds he must be even fatter then thatView attachment 3853593
We missed a few things in the past week
The caption for that one was plenty good:
View attachment 3853596
On a lighter note, check out Beetus-Hand Luke
View attachment 3853599
And the cherry on top was a hot take about 18-year olds.
View attachment 3853602
- Joined
- Aug 9, 2020
"You gotta work on yourself, you know what I mean?"
This has got to be one of the most ironic things he's ever said lmao. I don't think eating a salad is gonna fix all his problems but at this point I'm just impressed he didn't eat it off the floor.
This has got to be one of the most ironic things he's ever said lmao. I don't think eating a salad is gonna fix all his problems but at this point I'm just impressed he didn't eat it off the floor.
- Joined
- Feb 4, 2013
Shit like that is just further proof that Lucas is absolutely mindless, I'm not sure if he's incapable or just unwilling to actually listen to the words he says but either way they're not reaching him in a way that matters
WonderWino
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Dec 17, 2019
I'm surprised nobody asked him how he put on 60lb so quickly. It was only a few months ago he was claiming he weighed 240
- Joined
- Apr 28, 2015
This is probably the closest he has ever been honest about his actual current weight.
Al from Dadeville
Please expect my motion for sanctions forthvoming.
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Jul 20, 2019
I was browsing SOFALAW and noticed that Lucas tagged a possible orbiter that I haven’t seen discussed here:
I saw Lucas attempting to simp on her profile but as far as I can tell she’s not stuck in his orbit (even though Lucas is very fat)
This person did set off some red flags … do they remind you anyone else?
On further inspection this person seems to be someone who’s trying to help animals but also an animal hoarder
Does this seem relevant to anyone? The main Facebook profile appears to show a gap from late 2019 until June/July of this year, she appears to have been homeless and spent some time on skid row in 2019 but I lean towards that being a coincidence and not necessarily related to Lucas’s big adventure.
I saw Lucas attempting to simp on her profile but as far as I can tell she’s not stuck in his orbit (even though Lucas is very fat)
This person did set off some red flags … do they remind you anyone else?
On further inspection this person seems to be someone who’s trying to help animals but also an animal hoarder
Does this seem relevant to anyone? The main Facebook profile appears to show a gap from late 2019 until June/July of this year, she appears to have been homeless and spent some time on skid row in 2019 but I lean towards that being a coincidence and not necessarily related to Lucas’s big adventure.
Last edited:
- Joined
- Apr 28, 2015
Means a lot coming from a guy out of breath from simply moving a salad bowl. Are we going to see a resurgence of the grit wern?