Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

When will Jack drop dead?

  • February-March 2024

    Votes: 6 0.4%
  • April-May 2024

    Votes: 6 0.4%
  • June-July 2024

    Votes: 18 1.3%
  • August-September 2024

    Votes: 34 2.4%
  • October-November 2024

    Votes: 37 2.7%
  • December 2024

    Votes: 44 3.2%
  • Sometime in 2025

    Votes: 258 18.6%
  • Sometime in 2026

    Votes: 196 14.1%
  • Jack lives forever. The Wendigo Must Consoom

    Votes: 791 56.9%

  • Total voters
    1,390
I think it's weird how AnOminous is essentially a prophet, when talking about the future decline of Jack
I’m still rattled from that video he posted. I’m embarrassed to admit that I actually gave Jack the benefit of the doubt and thought that his first broadcast wouldn’t be a full-on bitchfest.

I used to think the venom from @AnOminous was embellished a little, but after watching that, I now agree with him wholeheartedly. I no longer hear an ironic voice when reading his comments. Jack has irreversibly made me into a complete A-log.

I hope that nursing home has a male nurse of color who violently beats and molests Jack before shoving a pillow over his face. All Jack senses is the Muzak from the hallway gradually getting softer before fading out.


Damn, he's looks like he's pushing 75. He looks horrendous.
…And you just *know* that he’s going to make Tammy hit a drive-thru once they start driving away from the nursing home. I look forward to a sequel to the infamous Arby’s video.
 
LOL! This is getting better and better. Jagoff has got to be starving at this point considering he's not allowed any "real" food that is full of grease, salt and meat. Although this could be good for him and he can lose some weight in the process.
What a dipshit. There's literally nothing wrong with this applesauce. But this fat moron would rather continue committing suicide even while still in the hospital as a helpless gimp. I almost bet this faggot checks himself out AMA after getting angy at something, like they won't give him cheeseburgers and then force them down his throat two-handed style, then has another stroke.
 
What a dipshit. There's literally nothing wrong with this applesauce. But this fat moron would rather continue committing suicide even while still in the hospital as a helpless gimp. I almost bet this faggot checks himself out AMA after getting angy at something, like they won't give him cheeseburgers and then force them down his throat two-handed style, then has another stroke.
At this point in his life he's not going to change. He can't change. He's spent years gorging on high fat food to fill that empty place inside him. Religion could only do so much and pizza never made him feel bad about himself or judged him.

I've known people who did a complete 180 on their diet and dropped a shit ton of weight, stopped eating fast food and started eating properly because their doctor told them they were going to die in their 50's if they didn't. This guy has suffered FOUR strokes and possibly a small heart attack and he still eats like a pig.

I've mad fun of the man for good reason, I've mocked his cooking, his lifestyle and the fact that he's a massive faggot but I've never wished death on him. Now that's changed. Call me an A-log if you want but the sooner he dies the better the world will be.
 
Jack sends back his apple sauce and demands a healthy salad
View attachment 4661178
I’m so disgusted right now because I can literally hear him saying it. Listen to him in the Flip Burger video when he doesn’t get his hashBROWNs.


I knew the bitching about the food arc was going to begin soon.
I’m honestly at peace with this. It’s another indicator that nothing has changed and he’s going to go right back to making his trademark content. Our real-time sideshow of a man eating himself to an early grave has been renewed for another season. Sort of a nature-healing-itself moment.

He will, inevitability, have another emergency, which will either kill him or cause him to decay further. It’ll be fun, regardless. The only thing that I’m not too excited about is (as we just experienced) the strong possibility that it will be a dull, non-spectacular end. I’d say we have better chances of winning the Powerball than being blessed with footage of Jack dying.
 
Oh my god, there we have it. The magical item that caused his latest health issues. Anyone win that bet?

Now would be a good time to repost Jack episodes where he make KETO desserts by replacing the sugar with sweetners while leaving in pounds of butter, hydrogenated oil, and flour.

Here is one, Jack makes fake sugar cheese cake slop with about seven kinds of sweetner.

I haven't watched or commented on Jack or his videos, but holy shit the fact that his right arm is just laying there on the counter in a fist, completely dead and unmoving, is disturbing to watch.
 
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Listen to him in the Flip Burger video when he doesn’t get his hashBROWNs.
Oh my god, I'm dying laughing over here. Why the fuck does he say hashbrowns so fucking weird EVERY time? It's like he's sneezing the word or something. HshBrunZ? Including the weird upward inflection like he's asking a question. It's about 6:15 or so and he says it over and over so many times, and it just keeps getting worse. "Does that look like HshBrunz? I didn't get HshBrunz?" And then he's back to it again at 11:25
 
I haven't watched or commented on Jack or his videos, but holy shit the fact that his right arm is just laying there on the counter in a fist, completely dead and unmoving, is disturbing to watch.
The crazy thing is that he watched it happen and did nothing to stop it or help improve it. He had a stroke and lost the function of his dominant arm and partially in his leg. I’d do some major fucking work if that happened to me. Jack sat by, did nothing, and let it atrophy.

His “rehab” was praying that Jesus would heal him while continuing the exact same behaviors that led up to it. It’s a completely asinine way to respond to the biggest health scare that the vast majority of people his age could possibly experience. It’s so stupid that it’s on the level of a cancer patient celebrating the end of chemo by going out and buying a pack of smokes.
 
Oh my god, I'm dying laughing over here. Why the fuck does he say hashbrowns so fucking weird EVERY time? It's like he's sneezing the word or something. HshBrunZ?
It’s really bad. It’s worse than the Jimmy Dean sausage guy saying SOSSitch.


He's going to get out of the nursing home into Tam Ham's care and go right back to eating like a slob. What do you guys think? One more year of Jack content? We need a new poll.
One more year would be nice. I could honestly see a Tiny Tim* situation happening, where Jack lingers a bit, then dies shortly after leaving the nursing home.

*TT survived his first heart attack, only to be killed by another two months later.

edit: spelling
 
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View attachment 4661753
An over 6 million hours in MSPaint transparency attached, use at your discretion.
Man, Cali Jack looks so young in comparison. You'd think the difference was closer to 30 years than 15.

The crazy thing is that he watched it happen and did nothing to stop it or help improve it. He had a stroke and lost the function of his dominant arm and partially in his leg. I’d do some major fucking work if that happened to me. Jack sat by, did nothing, and let it atrophy.

His “rehab” was praying that Jesus would heal him while continuing the exact same behaviors that led up to it. It’s a completely asinine way to respond to the biggest health scare that the vast majority of people his age could possibly experience. It’s so stupid that it’s on the level of a cancer patient celebrating the end of chemo by going out and buying a pack of smokes.
And he didn't get one of those rehab gloves until it was well and truly over, instead of getting it when it would've been helpful, it was the final attempt to buy an easy way into a working hand. Also, "JESUS SAVED MY ARM!" with Jack doing that stupid gangsta lean as seen in your avatar to hoist up the Kandy Klaw for a photoshoot was the funniest thing.
 
Oh my god, I'm dying laughing over here. Why the fuck does he say hashbrowns so fucking weird EVERY time? It's like he's sneezing the word or something. HshBrunZ? Including the weird upward inflection like he's asking a question. It's about 6:15 or so and he says it over and over so many times, and it just keeps getting worse. "Does that look like HshBrunz? I didn't get HshBrunz?" And then he's back to it again at 11:25
He says it like a Frenchman. Les 'ashBROWnz.

My headcannon is now that this is why the wordfilter used to change "hashbrowns" to "big black cock".
 
Oh my god, I'm dying laughing over here. Why the fuck does he say hashbrowns so fucking weird EVERY time? It's like he's sneezing the word or something. HshBrunZ? Including the weird upward inflection like he's asking a question. It's about 6:15 or so and he says it over and over so many times, and it just keeps getting worse. "Does that look like HshBrunz? I didn't get HshBrunz?" And then he's back to it again at 11:25
He's trying to avoid the wordfilter so that nobody will know he's really talking about BIG BLACK DICK.
 
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