Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks

[WonderWino]

His use of slang really bothers me. Maybe it's that it's a creepy and transparent attempt at being down with the youth, but also it sounds fucking retarded.

At this rate people could teach him the grounder language from the 100 and tell him its zoomer high school or text slang and he'd probably believe it. Plus it would be fucking hilarious. Its not like he'd know any different

 

[Greedmonger]

That recipe sounds awful

Everybody knows the only proper way to serve it is after marinating the octopus and lamb for three days in room temperature grape juice and olive oil and serving it with goat milk and olive oil soaked pickles and radishes with a ketchup, vinegar and peanut butter reduction sauce

With a side of lucky charms. Simply tossed in Rock City Grill peanut sauce with red bell pepper chunks, kosher salt, lemon juice, and blue cheese crumbles. Top it off with sliced potato, fish sauce, and chocolate syrup. Bussin

When my girlfriend has her friends over they beg me to make them a bowl of my lucky charms. I end up with a half dozen zoomer baes pawing at me and telling me how good I am at lucky charms, and how they don’t mind sharing if I can only make one bowl right now. Bitches love that peanut sauce… Surprised to hear Rock City is still open.

 

[AnOminous]

Not even topping it with crushed dry ramen noodles and the cheese powder packets from a Kraft Mac & Cheese. Amateurs.

 

[A Silly Possum]

Photo dump of some saved up shit from the last few days:

I have no idea where tf this idea came from but he thinks he could be a ruler of a country LMAO:



His most prized possession would be some fucking random pieces of some old ass board game. So depressing lol:


This thread is just bizarre. The way he's responding to people it's like he doesn't understand what they're saying because he's so lost in his own mind thinking about how "badass" these old warlords were. I have a feeling he wouldn't feel too fondly about ANY of those people if they existed today, they'd all just be fascists to him (also pretty sure he was trying to call Genghis Khan a chad for raping pillaging and torturing people, wtf?):


And lastly, some more fucked up food. The eggs in Mac n Cheese is particularly heinous. Like maybe it doesn't necessarily taste that bad but the consistency has to be vomit inducing:

"Simple ass" lol

 

[Da Dude123]

Photo dump of some saved up shit from the last few days:

I have no idea where tf this idea came from but he thinks he could be a ruler of a country LMAO:
View attachment 4967248
View attachment 4967364

His most prized possession would be some fucking random pieces of some old ass board game. So depressing lol:
View attachment 4967356

This thread is just bizarre. The way he's responding to people it's like he doesn't understand what they're saying because he's so lost in his own mind thinking about how "badass" these old warlords were. I have a feeling he wouldn't feel too fondly about ANY of those people if they existed today, they'd all just be fascists to him (also pretty sure he was trying to call Genghis Khan a chad for raping pillaging and torturing people, wtf?):
View attachment 4967352

And lastly, some more fucked up food. The eggs in Mac n Cheese is particularly heinous. Like maybe it doesn't necessarily taste that bad but the consistency has to be vomit inducing:
View attachment 4967252View attachment 4967360
"Simple ass" lol

God, he sooo dumb and autistic. Society is as simple as stores and businesses giving everything away for free. That solves everything! What a dumb cow. Him putting eggs in everything is sickening.

 

[Spunt]

God, he sooo dumb and autistic. Society is as simple as stores and businesses giving everything away for free. That solves everything! What a dumb cow. Him putting eggs in everything is sickening.

He also seems to think that $20m is enough to bribe a congressman to stand down. Bitch, $20m won't even get you a working brunch with a state senator.

 

[Poop Shoot]

This fucking retard can barely exist in a world where shit is already handed to him. The thought of him living in the type of society where people just take what they want would have him murdered the first time he bothered someone. He’d survive maybe…15 minutes or so.

Why do the most failed of men think they can somehow restructure society? You can’t run your own life let alone millions of others.

Low IQ idiots. I cannot imagine the utter embarrassment and shame in having and raising a child to have them turn out like that.

 

[WonderWino]

Photo dump of some saved up shit from the last few days:

I have no idea where tf this idea came from but he thinks he could be a ruler of a country LMAO:
View attachment 4967248
View attachment 4967364

His most prized possession would be some fucking random pieces of some old ass board game. So depressing lol:
View attachment 4967356

This thread is just bizarre. The way he's responding to people it's like he doesn't understand what they're saying because he's so lost in his own mind thinking about how "badass" these old warlords were. I have a feeling he wouldn't feel too fondly about ANY of those people if they existed today, they'd all just be fascists to him (also pretty sure he was trying to call Genghis Khan a chad for raping pillaging and torturing people, wtf?):
View attachment 4967352

And lastly, some more fucked up food. The eggs in Mac n Cheese is particularly heinous. Like maybe it doesn't necessarily taste that bad but the consistency has to be vomit inducing:
View attachment 4967252View attachment 4967360
"Simple ass" lol

What is it with lucas and simping for mass murdering psychopaths? First stalin and now genghis khan of all people. Popular with the women? He was probably the biggest rapist in history, theres a reason pretty much everyone in asia is in some way related to him. He did shit that would make hitler blush. But of course lucas somehow twists this around in his head to convince himself the guy was some kind of 13th century alpha chad. He thinks the same of joe 'shoot the first person who stops clapping' stalin as well. He really doesn't get there were consequences for not acting like that to these kinds of people. You're right, he completely ignored what everyone was saying to repeat nonsensical shit he convinced himself of. Makes me wonder if he was going through a mini manic phase of some kind when he wrote that. Too much caffeine or something

and lol at his 'my first order of business is to step down' when elected king. Well that would prevent him from actually doing any of the things he says he wants to right then and there. He sure didn't think that sentence through at all. But as usual, he wants to get rid of the cops so he can literally steal from people under threat of being robbed if they don't give him what he wants. Its so the businesses would be recommended to give away their shit for free to avoid riots sure sounds an awful lot like a mafia protection racket doesn't it? Nice store you have here flatbill, it would be a shame if someone started a riot and burned it down. Might want to give me some free food and booze so i'll put in a good word for you so that doesn't happen. Again, literal mafia tier shit, not to mention grifters like anita sarkeesian did exactly the same shit with her 'consulting business' for problematic developer content. This is exactly how he acted at his old apartment when he bounced the stairs and tried to blackmail his neighbors into giving him a woman so he'd keep quiet about the supposed drugs and abuse going on. He hasn't changed a bit. Its just now he's gauging peoples responses to such behavior as 'hypothetical situations' and clearly looking for an excuse to do that kind of thing in some form again, hoping people will give him suggestions as to how to get away with it. He thinks he's being clever about it. Not to mention he thinks extorting people with literal mafia protection racket tactics is a better way of living than the current government and system. and of course his solution to all the safeguards put in place to prevent this kind of thing from happening and a general collapse of government and law and order.....is to literally bribe the people who's job it is to make everything run and enforce laws to not do their job. For a guy who claims not to be a criminal he sure says alot of criminal things

and he has shown in that pic he is hardly regal enough to be a proper heir to king roy. No way he wouldn't be usurped by his brothers within a week. Kinda makes me wonder if he's legit trying to parody the king roy stuff with that pic though as some kind of weird flex to show how great of an heir he is

Lucas trying his protection racket scam on his favorite place - starbucks:

 

[Fanatical Pragmatist]

God, he sooo dumb and autistic. Society is as simple as stores and businesses giving everything away for free. That solves everything! What a dumb cow. Him putting eggs in everything is sickening.

He thinks of it the same way he spends his own money.
Every time he gets any kind of money to spend, he finds a way to blow it all as soon as possible without any forethought to the future.
"Oh hey! A Covid relief check? Perhaps I should invest in a winter coat, insulated tent and thermal sleeping bag? Naahhhhh 8 nights at the Motel 6 getting 3 entrees of Clinkerdagger doordashed to me per night is a better plan!"

He doesn't think what would happen if the stores gave away all their stuff for free then ran out of things to give, he just wants the temporary high of stores giving away their inventories for free.

 

[SteveGoatman]

He thinks of it the same way he spends his own money.
Every time he gets any kind of money to spend, he finds a way to blow it all as soon as possible without any forethought to the future.
"Oh hey! A Covid relief check? Perhaps I should invest in a winter coat, insulated tent and thermal sleeping bag? Naahhhhh 8 nights at the Motel 6 getting 3 entrees of Clinkerdagger doordashed to me per night is a better plan!"

He doesn't think what would happen if the stores gave away all their stuff for free then ran out of things to give, he just wants the temporary high of stores giving away their inventories for free.

This is just a rehashing of his Oliver Dangle story that Wernology read through about a year ago. Basically in his story he becomes President and shuts all government down (don't ask about how that would work or the legality etc....) and after a little while everybody just steals everything and that lead to peace and cooperating because....magic/autism.

 

[ToroidalBoat]

if Werner had a vehicle it'd likely be one of those "schizophrenia rides"

 

[An Sionnach Seang]

That said, all this pooner talk in the troon shooter thread got me thinking about lucas's frequent use of the term poonaner.

he probably means "punani", which is Jamaican patois for the female genitals (it definitely fits with the whole "pretending to be black" thing)

 

[Vi0l3t]

Hey kiwis, sour cream tacos for dinner!

 

[WonderWino]

Hey kiwis, sour cream tacos for dinner!
View attachment 4971733

Not surprising at all that he would load his tacos the the point they are mostly sour cream. Only thing surprising is that he didn't douse it all in pepper and hot sauce. Then again maybe he did after taking the pics

All this kings and queens stuff he has been on about lately makes him sound like a low iq wannabe mamber of the latin kings. Their ideology certainly sounds like something lucas would parrot, twist around in his head and make his own

 

[ToroidalBoat]

vomit inducing

For a moment I couldn't tell the first one was macaroni, and it looked like there were bugs crawling around in the second one.

 

[Stinkyboy]

Home made tacos would mean he got masa and made tortillas

What a fat

 

[Fatal Walter]

Lucas calling people cads now. I think that was one of Chris Chan's favorites. I should read this Oliver Dangle thing. I like how the first fucking sentence in the story is "The state instituted a 4 year long gulag society from 2024 to 2029."

 

[A Silly Possum]

(it definitely fits with the whole "pretending to be black" thing)

All this kings and queens stuff he has been on about lately makes him sound like a low iq wannabe mamber of the latin kings

It's hilarious that he unironically says these things to sound not-white to appeal to zoomers, saw this one today and it was easily the most black thing he's ever said besides when he smoked a blunt so powerful it made him want to say nigga like a black guy LMAO


I'm genuinely surprised he even understood what ouchea means. He doesn't seem to have a lot of social intelligence and problem solving skills despite claiming to be a board game genius. Lately he's been sperging out about how any game of chance (i.e. rolling dice in DnD) takes no skill and is a terribly designed game. Had myself a lot of lols at that hot take considering DnD is like the biggest tabletop game in the entire world.

Lucas calling people cads now. I think that was one of Chris Chan's favorites. I should read this Oliver Dangle thing. I like how the first fucking sentence in the story is "The state instituted a 4 year long gulag society from 2024 to 2029."

Ohhhh so cad isn't just a misspelling of chad. I just Googled it and that's honestly even worse than chad lmfao

Also, can anyone link me or post that video of him talking about smoking the nigga blunt? It's my favorite besides the one where he screams "GREEEDYY" in public but I can never find it and I'm too braindead to remember to save it whenever I see it.

Here's the classic greedy video mentioned in case anyone here hasn't seen it.

 

[NoosJunki]

More moooing from the fat cow.

View attachment 4928329

Dude, just rub one out. No one wants to read this "WANT WOMAN" hornyposting shit.

 

[lindsayfan]

Also, can anyone link me or post that video of him talking about smoking the nigga blunt? It's my favorite besides the one where he screams "GREEEDYY" in public but I can never find it and I'm too braindead to remember to save it whenever I see it.

Here's the classic greedy video mentioned in case anyone here hasn't seen it.
View attachment 4981472

damn that is a great video. while we're going through his greatest hits, in preparation for his impending death, i couldn't find an kiwi-archived copy of the classic "fistfight outside the mental health clinic" video which i think was the first lucas content i ever saw.