Boring Lolcows who you don't get the appeal of

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There are some lolcows who, in my estimation, are just people who overshare, have no life outside of the Internet, and never matured out of their teenage years. Maybe I'm getting older and softer, but I feel bad for those people and don't see the value in observing them. It's not like Chris Chan who, for all of his sins, is a profoundly creative and interesting human being.
 
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Hey Johnny Bravo said:
There are some lolcows who, in my estimation, are just people who overshare, have no life outside of the Internet, and never matured out of their teenage years. Maybe I'm getting older and softer, but I feel bad for those people and don't see the value in observing them. It's not like Chris Chan who, for all of his sins, is a profoundly creative and interesting human being.
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A true lolcow is genuinely interesting and almost respectable in a way, before you get to the total lack of accountability and weird shit. He has to do something that could, if it were done well, be worthy of attention and get himself into trouble without outside intervention. In another universe, he would be an early youtube vlogger.

This new crop doesn't have that or are blandly mentally ill instead of superlatively mentally ill. Half of them are just failed content creators or run of the mill grifters. It doesn't help that no one is sharing the good stuff because outside intervention dries up all the milk these days.
 
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Piggle-o said:
This new crop doesn't have that or are blandly mentally ill instead of superlatively mentally ill. Half of them are just failed content creators or run of the mill grifters. It doesn't help that no one is sharing the good stuff because outside intervention dries up all the milk these days.
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The thirst for attention is a bit repulsive for lolcows imo.

There's something a bit respectable when someone has been skizo posting for years for a very tiny public.

Like I love this guy and thing he would be a top lolcow if he spoke English


That guy has been skizoposting online like a cryptid for 15+ years.
 
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JamusActimus said:
There's something a bit respectable when someone has been skizo posting for years for a very tiny public.

Like I love this guy and thing he would be a top lolcow if he spoke English


That guy has been skizoposting online like a cryptid for 15+ years.
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That would be some nice material in English. Like really nice, much like that one Finn who has a house that looks like that.
 
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Piggle-o said:
That would be some nice material in English. Like really nice, much like that one Finn who has a house that looks like that.
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Weirdly enough his dad is a doctor. His mom is a hoarder tho.

That guy is really fascinating, like you can find 15 year old psychobable and youtube videos that he made in random places if you search the relevant key words.

Everyone discarded it as random spam.but it's actually part of his lore now. The autistic mind is wild there's still an internal logic.
 
FindingEvie is the most boring deathfat ever and I'm glad shes getting her own containment thread away from the general deathfat thread that immediately died right after.
 
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GratsTheat783 said:
Any of the ones who are lolcows just for being fat women, like Amberlynn, Foodie Beauty, etc. Partly also because I find some of the stuff about them absolutely gross and would rather not know.
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I really like glitterandlazers and Tess Holliday in terms of fatgirlcows but I agree with you on Amberlynn Reid. I find her so boring. I also feel like she’s pretty self aware and manufactures content for people to react to. I saw a video making fun of the fact she said “I’ve been WALKEEN lately…” like how is that funny at all? She could’ve just said that knowing she’ll have some viral content cause that’s how low the bar is for the “haydurs”
 
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DSP
He is not interesting or bad at games anymore. He got through Elden Ring and the DLC for it. BUT MUH WRASELLSING MICROTRANSATIONS GAME.
Unfunny autistics trying to control how somebody spends the money they have is really annoying to listen too. He talked shit at a fighting game con over 10 years ago. And said racist things on a youtube video 10 years ago.(People who make this point also post in A&H about how the Jews need to be wiped out and other /pol/ posting about niggers, the irony is more funny than Phill could ever be.) Seems to be trolled and A-logged by people 60000% worse than him. Who have crossed lines so many times and had more pozzing negholes incidents than we can count.
Justification for a-logging: HE LIES ON THE INTERTNET.
Like nobody has ever done that before. Lying on the internet is barely something that makes anyone a lolcow.
Call me back when he rapes someone or talks to a minor sexually.
 
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just Reading a post said:
Call me back when he rapes someone or talks to a minor sexually.
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To be fair, some of his A-logs insist that he groomed one of his old girlfriends when she was underage. I have no idea if it's true though. It kind of seems like reaching for another reason to hate him. He strikes me as more of a sex-phobe than a manipulative pervert, but again, I could be wrong.

I emphatically agree with everything you've said. The only tolerable DSP commentator I've been able to find is Atlus the Bookkeeper. Even then, he flies into rages during livestreams when he's covering the guy. DSP's just… hard to look at, and harder to listen to. I don't know how anyone can stand to hate-watch him, let alone watch him normally. Lol.
 
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eDove said:
He strikes me as more of a sex-phobe than a manipulative pervert,
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I would bet the trolling of him has made him just refuse to engage with anyone reaching out in DMs, in that way.
Phil is not as retarded as someone like Dragonlord who will be baited by a female accounts. It has got to the point where people are committing real life crimes against him to get a reaction.
No shit he will be unhappy and angry when someone hacks his shit, and blackmails him with personal information. Any normal person would.
No person on that subforum can point at anything Phil has done in the last 10 years and say he deserves to put up with the retards that troll him.
He says no political takes, he does not talk to minors.
Wings is another one that has been trolled so much by people much worse than him.
"We committed charge back fraud against him look he is soooooo mad lolz WE IZ LEGION." - Wings trolls
Committing financial crimes against people would make anyone angry, It is not lolcow behaviour to be angry when a crime has been committed against you.
 
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Carpalorbit said:
I agree with OP on DSP. Watching him be bad at/complain about videogames is entertaining for all of about 15 minutes before it gets repetitive.
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DSP was only funny in really early days, before he had his embarrassing "Haters" and his pathetic "Defenders".

I remember him playing the Resident Evil 1 remake, claiming he was going to play it "Blind" and on Hard.

He ended up "Accidentally" playing on Easy, STILL ended up getting his ass kicked, and had to repeatedly pause the video to absolutely not look up a walk-through on what to do next when he was completely stumped.

These days, he would've had his 'Haters' spamming the chat while his mods spoon-feed him walk-throughs.
 
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I thought the whole point of DSP is that he's throughly unremarkable and has nothing to offer the internet in terms of quality content (and never really has, not intentionally) but that somehow the universe keeps letting him get away with pretending like he does.

My own answer: there are a lot of internet figures who are disliked and, because of that, have threads filled with people claiming they're cows. But they aren't. They're just assholes on the internet. That's not a lolcow.
 
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Bossmanjack, Cyraxx, Daniel Larson, Smartschoolboy guy and a few others that I can’t name at the top of my head. Any cow that Zoomers fuck with for clout instantly loses hilarity for me because it’s artificial milk.

Smartschoolboy is a weird pedophile, and cowtipping faggots have ruined any chance of him being properly ID’d.
 
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just Reading a post said:
He says no political takes
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Phil does have political takes once in a while, and when he does they're usually fairly sensible regular dude takes like "Cops shooting people without cause is obviously an issue but using it as an excuse to riot, loot, and burn is counter productive" (paraphrased). He still even makes chud jokes once in a while, and he'd probably make more if there wasn't a swarm of insane people following him around looking for any chance they can to report him.

DSP in a lot of ways doesn't feel like he even belongs on the modern internet, his lolcow status and the dynamic its created has made him like some type of internet dinosaur preserved in his own isolated lake up in the mountains. To me that's part of the charm, he never quite seems to understand what's going on around him.
 
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