Lolcow KingCobraJFS / Josh Saunders - Amateur musician, YouTube Streamer, wandmaker, and self-proclaimed "sexy goth badboy". Perpetually circling the drain.

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To be fair, the trailer park from the Trailer Park Boys seemed pretty awesome. I wish real life trailer parks were like this. It would make for some nice content.

Sadly, in the real world, theres no Ricky or Bubbles or Mr Lahey. Just a bunch of sad people with all sorts of problems.

The trailer park saga will be the worst saga.
 
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Captain Ahab said:
Sadly, in the real world, theres no Ricky or Bubbles or Mr Lahey. Just a bunch of sad people with all sorts of problems.
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The place where cobes lives is less like a trailer park filled with single mothers with mutt babies and meth heads and more like a retirement home. It's mostly old people and small families. Cobes is probably the most white trash person in the place.
 
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Josh wouldn’t make it through a sobriety arc. His life is so depressing and he’s so miserable that the only reason he doesn’t blow his brains out is because he’s essentially sedated all day long.

Being sober and confronting the state of his life and his many failures would destroy him.

The last time Josh was more or less sober, or at least had a ”normal“ drinking habit, was when he was young and full of life and hope for the future. It was back when he was working, had girlfriends, went outside, hung out with his buddies, had more or less a full head of hair and normal teeth. He was full of life and optimism and literally though he was on the cusp of making it big as a YouTuber or rockstar. He even made a stupid drawing of his dream house. He literally thought he was gonna live in a mansion with a clock tower.

Fast forward to now. He’s a nobody. Just a smelly drunk living in a trailer park. mostly bald, rotten teeth, no career, no love life. Josh isn’t ready to face that sober.
 
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Captain Ahab said:
Josh wouldn’t make it through a sobriety arc. His life is so depressing and he’s so miserable that the only reason he doesn’t blow his brains out is because he’s essentially sedated all day long.

Being sober and confronting the state of his life and his many failures would destroy him.

The last time Josh was more or less sober, or at least had a ”normal“ drinking habit, was when he was young and full of life and hope for the future. It was back when he was working, had girlfriends, went outside, hung out with his buddies, had more or less a full head of hair and normal teeth. He was full of life and optimism and literally though he was on the cusp of making it big as a YouTuber or rockstar. He even made a stupid drawing of his dream house. He literally thought he was gonna live in a mansion with a clock tower.

Fast forward to now. He’s a nobody. Just a smelly drunk living in a trailer park. mostly bald, rotten teeth, no career, no love life. Josh isn’t ready to face that sober.
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Yeah the writing is on the wall already. Cobra is likely going to drink himself to death. Kicking an alcohol addiction that severe is already hard enough for people with normal jobs and semi-functioning lives so being in Cobra's position as an autistic regard makes it virtually impossible. It would require a herculean effort to remake himself and stay sober. He would have to utterly transform every aspect of his daily life and habits but unfortunately Cobra is a creature of habit who has an obsessive relationship with dank drink combos
 
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Captain Ahab said:
Josh wouldn’t make it through a sobriety arc. His life is so depressing and he’s so miserable that the only reason he doesn’t blow his brains out is because he’s essentially sedated all day long.

Being sober and confronting the state of his life and his many failures would destroy him.

The last time Josh was more or less sober, or at least had a ”normal“ drinking habit, was when he was young and full of life and hope for the future. It was back when he was working, had girlfriends, went outside, hung out with his buddies, had more or less a full head of hair and normal teeth. He was full of life and optimism and literally though he was on the cusp of making it big as a YouTuber or rockstar. He even made a stupid drawing of his dream house. He literally thought he was gonna live in a mansion with a clock tower.

Fast forward to now. He’s a nobody. Just a smelly drunk living in a trailer park. mostly bald, rotten teeth, no career, no love life. Josh isn’t ready to face that sober.
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His rare moments of self reflection have gotten more and more brutal since the Conquistador era.
 
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Agares said:
His rare moments of self reflection have gotten more and more brutal since the Conquistador era.
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Even in his moments of vulnerability he still continues to blame the trolls though and not take any personal accountability. He can't get a gf because he puts zero effort into his looks or making himself a desirable mate for the opposite sex in any single way. He expects a goth chick to just show up at his door because he's a famous YouTube star
 
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funscape said:
Even in his moments of vulnerability he still continues to blame the trolls though and not take any personal accountability. He can't get a gf because he puts zero effort into his looks or making himself a desirable mate for the opposite sex in any single way. He expects a goth chick to just show up at his door because he's a famous YouTube star
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His YouTube infamy turned out to be a monkey's paw wish. He's too regarded to realize he's "famous" for all the wrong reasons but it's still his only accomplishment in his life and the troles have just become a convenient excuse to dodge accountability like you said. It would be so depressing if the BOY wasn't so unintentionally funny.
 
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Agares said:
His YouTube infamy turned out to be a monkey's paw wish. He's too regarded to realize he's "famous" for all the wrong reasons but it's still his only accomplishment in his life and the troles have just become a convenient excuse to dodge accountability like you said. It would be so depressing if the BOY wasn't so unintentionally funny.
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The thing is Josh is probably the funniest person on the internet. If he had an IQ above 70, some business sense and put in a little effort, he could easily blow up and reach the fame level of Tommy Wiseau for example. His extreme sense of entitlement and lack of desire to improve in any single way prevents him from turning his fame into a success
 
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"They were out of stock on the other flavor"

I honestly recommend against using door dash for things like Rock Stars and anything else that comes in a wide variety of flavors. You won't get the one you want, you'll get whichever one they see first.

Unless... he actually went to the store? What are the odds?
 
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