Orbiter "Flutter" / "Egg" / "Cabbage Patch" / "Meryl" / "Food Lion lady" - Modern Christory's biggest mystery

[James Howlett]

I really don't know what's more retarded right now:

a) the Chris-chan thread
b) the people posting about a Chris-chan baby in the chris-chan thread

Flutter, pregnant? Maybe. Chris the daddy? I will put a potato up my ass if that's true (I'm not putting a potato up my ass, this is retarded)

 

[King Of The Kiwis]

If the original incel can have a kid what’s your excuse kiwifarmers

 

[C. G. B. Spender]

Its never been this over... (again)

 

[ChexMix88]

Guys...
Idk how to tell you this...
I was just talking with a few of my buddies about stream highlights, to have them added to the CWCki, and I saw Net Narcolepsy added some already...
And...uhhh
Here, have this clip.
View attachment 6680187
I have no idea where this question even came from or what Chris is talking about, but...

Chris expects a child this summer.

Some real I am Sam shit

 

[Schwarzwald]

This is an indictment of society and the Internet in 2024 and the people who grew up with it. Chris in the late 2000s would have never gotten this far. Yet a far more reprehensible and unhinged version of himself now has because he's more well-known?

Horrific.

 

[Beautiful Border]

One thing you can't claim about Chris Chan is that he falls short on surprises. That's why I love following along, literally anything can happen

 

[WelperHelper99]

I really need to get more sleep, I could almost swear that feature says Chris Chan got a woman pregnant.

I can't imagine why anyone would willingly have his child.

That bent duck must hit different. Women can't get enough.

 

[Dang dirty Pidgeons!]

It's not like steroids, it doesn't COMPLETELY shut down sperm production, especially not in relatively lower doses. If he quits for a while, it'll come back.

Even with steroids that tends to be the case, up to a point ofc.

Isn't it more likely they just fugged and he assumes she's pregnant from that?
Does he really grasp the HRT thing? Does he even take it regularly? And if so, do any of us really think he is deliberate enough in his actions to go:

Ah, yes, I only have this one shot at locking this freaky bitch down, gonna make her preggers. Dang, gotta stop my E therapy.
A month should do it, may have to look that one up, tho... Well, I guess before I take that flight I'll have an urologist take my sperm count. Fingers crossed.

Does that sound like chris? Like, at all?

He just had sex without a condom and thinks the girl's going to be pregnant, that's it.
If he's not sterile and flutter actually did a pregnancy test, we're looking at a The Omen situation. Then, all bets are off. God Speed.

 

[Elite Kipchak]

I want off Mr. Bones' Wild Ride.

 

[Powerhouse of the Cell]

Guys...
Idk how to tell you this...
I was just talking with a few of my buddies about stream highlights, to have them added to the CWCki, and I saw Net Narcolepsy added some already...
And...uhhh
Here, have this clip.
View attachment 6680187
I have no idea where this question even came from or what Chris is talking about, but...

Chris expects a child this summer.

This is fucking horrifying.
I really don't want this to be true, I really want this to be some bullshit that he thinks in his head or trolls made him think.

The thought of him having a child unironically fills me with dread.

 

[beautiful person]

Oh no! That poor, poor child Maybe God will have mercy and it will self-abort.

Hopefully flutter will give birth in Finland, if she is pregnant, where they don’t allow ridiculous names to be registered.

For once, Europe's hatred of freedom comes through.

 

[Zetsubou]

a guy who can't change himself changing a baby that he's raising to be the child of the son-daughter of sonichu will be the next great era of internet content.

 

[All Smiles]

Further proof that Chris actually has reality warping powers.

"And I just won..."

 

[SaltyFanta]

If the original incel can have a kid what’s your excuse kiwifarmers

I'm not going to rape my mother for some hybristophile pussy.

 

[Seedling]

Finally an abortion case the gender wars can all agree on

 

[Punished Brent]

I want to say this can’t be real and that Chris is lying but after barb idk anymore

 

[Neurotypical Mantis]

NO
NOOOOOOO
oh good lord please let it get cps'd.
i hope it looks like flutter. imagine this fucking kid's school life.

 

[Kiwisee]

I just hope that for the sake of the kid’s future, nothing about it will be posted. I can’t imagine a worse fate than being the son of Chris Chan. The child is most likely to become Chris’ biggest A-Log to ever exist, because their life was ruined long before conception.

I hate to say it but I hope that Flutter has been sleeping around and is just saying it’s Chris’ to ward off suspicion.

 

[卐ㅤㅤ]

What happens if Chris Chan’s child grows up and ends up meeting Xander or Cozy Rozy, and has a child with one of them? It would be the ultimate lolcow.

Sonichu Perkele Chandler mates with Rozy.
Rosechu Perkele Chandler mates with Xanny.
Being Chandlerchus, the resulting offspring then naturally mate with each other.

 

[WelperHelper99]

I just hope that for the sake of the kid’s future, nothing about it will be posted. I can’t imagine a worse fate than being the son of Chris Chan. The child is most likely to become Chris’ biggest A-Log to ever exist, because their life was ruined long before conception.

I hate to say it but I hope that Flutter has been sleeping around and is just saying it’s Chris’ to ward off suspicion.

You are so kind. That kid was doomed the second news hit the fourm.