Orbiter "Flutter" / "Egg" / "Cabbage Patch" / "Meryl" / "Food Lion lady" - Modern Christory's biggest mystery

[Male Idiot]

He just won. The Alpha Male CWC Arc is upon is. Ralph and Nick's little gay bet about who gets a girl pregnant is now usurped by the new coming of Jesus ...3.0? The Cado omen spoke true.

 

[Dr. Ricearoni]

So if this is real, what song should Dear Feeder play on the forum for the birth?

a funeral dirge as he burns the site down one board at a time

 

[JT Marlin]

Guys...
Idk how to tell you this...
I was just talking with a few of my buddies about stream highlights, to have them added to the CWCki, and I saw Net Narcolepsy added some already...
And...uhhh
Here, have this clip.
View attachment 6680187
I have no idea where this question even came from or what Chris is talking about, but...

Chris expects a child this summer.

The madlad, he finally did it...

Also I was so wrong with my theory that Flutter was just a hired nanny for Praetor.

 

[Prof Loco Strikes Back]

Here I thought the dimensional merge couldn't get anymore weird and this happens. 2025 is going to be a wild ride.

 

[Darksy DePhil]

If a leaked video of Chris fucking Flutter akin to the gunt thumb sex tape ever pops up i'm going to lose my sanity. It's gonna be up there with the axe wound, the bluespike antics and the incest.

 

[A Wumpa Fruit]

>Flutter is waiting for baby to come out
>Finally they see it
>Doctor proudly announces ''Its a boy!"
>Chris is quiet for a moment and starts huffing and puffing
>Slams the child with full force to the ground because he cannot name it Crystal Weston Chandler now,

and then, he releases an stress sigh and goes to play switch outside the hospital

 

[Spangled Drongo]

So depending on the kid's citizenship (assuming it's real) is this going to be Finland or the US's problem? I've heard of way too many cases of shitty parents relocating specifically so they can evade authorities and continue to abuse their kids, and that's the first thing that came to mind. Though if people from child services in any country have even a hint of competence they'll look into Chris' background and go "nope, this mentally ill weirdo does not deserve custody of a child". This is assuming it isn't another delusion - best case scenario it is and he's making it all up.

Though either way... serves as yet more proof that he can't keep his gender fantasies straight, I guess he's thrown that out the window somewhat though now he's actually found someone...

2025 will be an interesting year either way. Also if real, do we think the name will be Crystal/Reginald or will Flutter insist on naming it some Finnish name?

 

[A Wumpa Fruit]

Chris Chandler is going to be a father before MovieBob gets so much as a pity kiss from a distant cousin. What a time to be alive!

isn´t Movieblob an old ass man? same with boogie?
I think on cursed points, Chris can beat both not only with a child,also just because the cursed factor he manages, the lolcow hell has their own favorites

In 30 years we're going to be sitting in retirement homes, reading the latest KF thread on how reginald weston chandler has raped his elderly mom flutter..

I can´t wait, KF in the retirement asylum

We do have to remember that Chris is highly delusional. Dude believed he was actually Jesus and had godlike powers in prison, and that he was going to bring about the merge by astral projecting himself different places. I'm taking an educated guess as to this being him rambling while off his meds, or he's been taking the same antipsychs for a while and they're losing effectiveness.

If its real though... god help us all.

I could say "we know he´s full of shit, don´t ruin the fun"
but....to be honest...nobody is having fun......

 

[Neil]

Guys...
Idk how to tell you this...
I was just talking with a few of my buddies about stream highlights, to have them added to the CWCki, and I saw Net Narcolepsy added some already...
And...uhhh
Here, have this clip.
View attachment 6680187
I have no idea where this question even came from or what Chris is talking about, but...

Chris expects a child this summer.

I fucking despise the Praetor faggots so much, it's unreal. Have Chris bring a child into the world for teh lulz (and profit!)

 

[GluttonousManSlob]

I really fucking hope that this is just some delusion Chris blurted out at random. He is barely able to take care of himself, let alone a kid who will mostly likely have worse developmental issues than him. Nothing good can come of this.

 

[Trombonista]

Guys...
Idk how to tell you this...
I was just talking with a few of my buddies about stream highlights, to have them added to the CWCki, and I saw Net Narcolepsy added some already...
And...uhhh
Here, have this clip.
View attachment 6680187
I have no idea where this question even came from or what Chris is talking about, but...

Chris expects a child this summer.

What's the Finnish equivalent of Crystal? Kristal?

 

[Satan SoJoe]

Are you telling me even the mom-rapist Tranny version of chris chan can get offspring before I do?

 

[Chickin BBQ]

The lovequest... It's ogre.

 

[Killing and Eating People]

Besides being cripplingly autistic, fat, and some kind of schizophrenic, Chris Chan is actually a tall handsome chad, and is white.

Basically Jersh needs to move to around Chris to take care of this child of prophecy

 

[McSneaks]

Chris can't even take care of himself. If he does impregnate flutter, that poor kid will have a sociopathic mother who has a thing for guys who rape their moms and then a dad who can barely take care of himself and thinks he's Jesus

At least that means the kid is guaranteed to succeed their love quest...

 

[A Wumpa Fruit]

Can't wait for the retard baby child abuse neglect saga.

a worst saga than the fucking incest saga...
no...wait, FORGET IT, every word someone says is dangerous and has cursed connotations in the Chrisverse

 

[Caroline Farrow]

Utterly horrifying.

If this is true the courts and child protective services must step in.

 

[Umaibae]

So depending on the kid's citizenship (assuming it's real) is this going to be Finland or the US's problem? I've heard of way too many cases of shitty parents relocating specifically so they can evade authorities and continue to abuse their kids, and that's the first thing that came to mind. Though if people from child services in any country have even a hint of competence they'll look into Chris' background and go "nope, this mentally ill weirdo does not deserve custody of a child". This is assuming it isn't another delusion - best case scenario it is and he's making it all up.

Though either way... serves as yet more proof that he can't keep his gender fantasies straight, I guess he's thrown that out the window somewhat though now he's actually found someone...

2025 will be an interesting year either way. Also if real, do we think the name will be Crystal/Reginald or will Flutter insist on naming it some Finnish name?

Legally can have both citizenships.

 

[SentinentCloud]

Utterly horrifying.

If this is true the courts and child protective services must step in.

why dont be mean spirited christ chan could end up becoming a great mother to lil barb jr

 

[Idiotus Maximus]

You know, sometimes I get low, sometimes I worry about my own self worth, and then I log in to KF and see shit like this, and I think "yeah, you know what, I'm doing all right". Comparatively speaking, I'm doing fucking fantastically. Cheers Chris, you weird little fuck.