Ubisoft Sellout - Bankruptcy Speedrun Any% Thread

[Anachronistic2]

I'm just glad Driver is dead. Just imagine the kind of shit GAAS monstrosity they would create out of it today, at least it got to go out on a high note with that weird coma game.

I assume it would basically just be The Crew but with some poorly written story attached. So basically The Crew.

 

[30+GameOvers]

I assume it would basically just be The Crew but with some poorly written story attached. So basically The Crew.

Considering that Watch Dogs engine was made from a cancelled on-foot open world Driver project, I wouldn't be surprised if The Crew was originally that horrid GAAS Driver game, before they realized that Driver name didn't have a draw. Undercover cop would make more sense as a protagonist than whatever soyjak you played as in The Crew, I already forgot.

 

[The Last Stand]

Speaking of We Wuz Samurai, its release is getting further pushed to March 20.

Kotaku article on the delay. I won't drop the whole article, but but one paragraph had me stunned.

Assassin’s Creed Shadows was formally announced in May 2024, and was intended to arrive last year in November. The next entry in Ubisoft’s popular and long-running series, Shadows takes the Assassin’s Creed formula to Japan, a location fans have wanted for years. It also has two playable protagonists, a feature last seen in 2015's Assassin’s Creed Syndicate. However, one of these characters—famous Black samurai Yasuke—was at the center of a manufactured controversy among parts of the internet over his race and depiction in the game.

Okay, first of all, I would think any controversy is "manufactured" since you'd need collective outrage for the controversy to be fueled. Second of all, good job ignoring that a whole country expressed competent on a fictional product depicting several historical and cultural inaccuracies and asking for full price.

 

[30+GameOvers]

Kotaku article on the delay. I won't drop the whole article, but but one paragraph had me stunned.



Okay, first of all, I would think any controversy is "manufactured" since you'd need collective outrage for the controversy to be fueled. Second of all, good job ignoring that a whole country expressed competent on a fictional product depicting several historical and cultural inaccuracies and asking for full price.

Oh, so the entire nation of Japan is racist and manufactured this controversy to bully Ubisoft for a laugh. I'm sure this kind of attitude won't lower the sales there even more!

 

[Snekposter]

I wonder if the delay is still gonna fuck them since that would give a solid month of these 3 games getting all the hype in Feb

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Avowed is probably going to mid but Monster Hunter Wilds and Kingdom Come Deliverance 2 will probably have some legs on them.

Can't forget this, especially since I'm not seeing any mentions of Denuvo on the Steam page.

 

[TrainWreckWatcher]

I wonder if the delay is still gonna fuck them since that would give a solid month of these 3 games getting all the hype in Feb

View attachment 6838437

Avowed is probably going to mid but Monster Hunter Wilds and Kingdom Come Deliverance 2 will probably have some legs on them.

These niggers are fucked no matter what
Going up against the historical Juggernaut that is KCD2 would have obliterated them.
They should just cut their losses.

There is zero hype for Avowed the Devs killed it. I've seen hardcore obsidian fans bail out cause of the anti white comments.

Just cancel it and take the 300 million in tax write offs. At this point that's probably the far the better option.

Veilguard is rumored to have failed to sell a million copies and people hate this a lot more than they hate that game.

It is the best option. I can't see them making even 1/3 their expenses back.

Christ Ubisoft is just total flaming out here. Those words never mean anything good. The company is gonna get picked clean by vultures.

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No one is even willing to buy them anymore. They just want the IPs and are salivating. Everyone can see Ubisoft limping and falling behind the herd. The wolves are circling.

God fucking dammit. I want to see this thing crash and burn already.

Polishing this crock of shit is pointless, because it's a crock of shit. Whether the game is buggy or not won't change anything.

They're just kicking the shitcan down hoping someone will buy them out going "Yeah this games going to be big guys! Should buy is... c'mon, please... Buy us (But on our terms)!"

 

[Max Weber]

This is a capitulation, they're getting ready for a sellout. I swear Bethesda used similar language right before daddy Microsoft bought them out.

Except Zenimax/Bethesda were deliberatly preparing for a sellout, were still highly regarded by normie audience, had IPs with weight behind them and announced new ones, all of which lead to a nice $7.5b evaluation. Ubi is just burning money and reputation while hoping that someone saves them.

 

[Maude Snew]

Oh, so the entire nation of Japan is racist and manufactured this controversy to bully Ubisoft for a laugh. I'm sure this kind of attitude won't lower the sales there even more!

Yeah, Japan is pretty racist, what that has to do with a white guy making shit up and some Frenchies just running with it and shitting out a garbage game I don't get but then I am not a games journalist.

 

[ChefKiss]

Kotaku has some neck talking about manufactured controversy with their "Persona 5 slur", Dragons Crown and Kingdom Come Deliverance complete nonsense controversies among the hundreds of other attempts

 

[Back me up!]

I just love how Ubisoft never, ever does any research about anything related to Japan.



Gonna remember TWO bombs happening on March 20th in 2026.

 

[Jace on ice]

I'm starting to think Ubisoft has genuinely no idea what Japan even is.

The average weeb probably has a more realistic conception.

 

[Maude Snew]

Gonna remember TWO bombs happening on March 20th in 2026.

Just like the game itself makes reference to two different bombs.

Outstanding fucking moves there, you couldn't fail any harder if you tried, this is the funniest shit Ubisoft has ever done.

 

[⋖ cørdion ⋗]

Monster Hunter Wilds

The UI looks like one of those "Modern UI" parody screenshots. Your health bar being a moving wave that flash red if the next move kills you. Having to abuse the new reticle system to change attacks and direction quickly. No pre-established camps cause you bring your own. Tons of super complex systems instead of redoing the ones that don't work at their core.

I hope to fuck this game does well but I fear it won't. I'll get it when it's -50% in 6 months.

 

[Hermiöne Granger]

The end might be near for Ubisoft. The year has barely started, and it seems as though the former giant of the gaming industry is showing more signs of decline as it seemingly prepares for bankruptcy ahead of the release of Assassin’s Creed Shadows.

Ubisoft Seemingly Prepping for Bankruptcy Ahead of Assassin’s Creed Shadows Release as Past Failures Spell Almost Certain Doom

 

[Jace on ice]

Couldn't give two fucks if Assassin's cringe ceases to exist but I really hope Splinter Cell finds a home with devs who appreciate it.

 

[MetokurGroomedMe]

View attachment 6840068
Can't forget this, especially since I'm not seeing any mentions of Denuvo on the Steam page.

square likes to add denuvo as a last minute surprise to all their games, so that doesn't mean anything until the game is released.

 

[TV's Adam West]

HOW THE FUCK DO YOU DELAY IT TO THE ANNIVERSARY OF THE TOKYO SUBWAY TERRORIST ATTACK
HOW THIS HAS TO BE INTENTIONAL

 

[Oliver Onions]

I'm just glad Driver is dead. Just imagine the kind of shit GAAS monstrosity they would create out of it today, at least it got to go out on a high note with that weird coma game.

I'd feel better if it weren't for that fact that Driver: San Francisco was completely delisted and is effectively lost media now. Not content with fucking up their future games, Ubisoft seems determined to make sure I can't even enjoy the good old ones without jumping through hoops.

 

[p1138]

So Ubisoft spent 200 million and 10 years on Skull and Bones, which was supposed to be a spin-off of a one-off part of the Assasssin's Creed Series.

Meanwhile Sega is releasing a spin-off of their Yakuza series that also lets you be a pirate

Didn't take a decade, probably didn't even take 100 million dollars, and looks like a more interesting pirate game in every aspect nevermind the insane anime rocket drifting flamethrower broadsides ship battles, and summoning sea spirits or whatever the fuck monsters in melee combat while being able to paint hello kitty or whatever the fuck on the side of your boat.

I wonder if it's going to do as well as Skull & Bones...

 

[Jace on ice]

HOW THE FUCK DO YOU DELAY IT TO THE ANNIVERSARY OF THE TOKYO SUBWAY TERRORIST ATTACK
HOW THIS HAS TO BE INTENTIONAL
View attachment 6842688

I don't think the boomer higher ups have any idea but it wouldn't surprise me at all if millennial devs who are probably part of the twitter/reddit anti sexualization/fanservice movements are doing this on purpose.

Those types absolutely despise Japanese culture more than racist could ever hope to.