Nicholas Robert Rekieta / Rekieta "Law" / Actually Criminal / @NickRekieta - Polysubstance enthusiast, "Lawtuber" turned Dabbleverse streamer, swinger, "whitebread ass nigga", snuffs animals for fun, visits 🇯🇲 BBC resorts. Legally a cuckold who lost his license to practice law. Wife's bod worth $50. The normies even know.

[Agamemnon Busmalis]

I wonder how much volume of cannabis plants the Indo-Europeans had to toss into the fire while doing shaman stuff to get high back in the day.

Probably not much, it would've had higher THC content since there wasn't selective breeding yet for better fabric production. The cannabinoids must have something to do with protecting or spreading the seeds of it but it's not something I'm that knowledgeable about.

 

[Sinbad the Sailor]

Here's a poor first attempt:

View attachment 6963953

[L] [A] [L] [A]

Can't say I disagree with the claim here.

 

[Grotesque Bushes]

Just 1000 pages and I'll get to make a joke that's still funnier than any one of Nick's

 

[Owlbear]

8000 pages, let's see what he does for the next Lolcow of the year award

All four of the following are on the table:

• Divorce
• Troonout
• Homelessness
• Death

He may need more than one of the above to really exceed the expectations he set last year.

 

[Law]

This church thing really gets more ridiculous the more I think about it. Didn't Nick know going into this "marriage" that he was going to have to spend every Sunday with a barn full of Scandinavian in-laws, celebrating a faith he despises?

If Nick wanted to have a veneer of "Christian" respectability while having a harem and being a scammer, why not try Mormonism?
They even allow tattoos and piercings now.

"insane person's literal delusions and it completely ass fucked my life."

"insane person" = my 8 year old daughter
"delusions" = cocaine

 

[Pomniman]

If Nick wanted to have a veneer of "Christian" respectability while having a harem and being a scammer, why not try Mormonism?
They even allow tattoos and piercings now.

His branding revolved around being an alcoholic so it'd never work. Active mormons at least have to at least pretend not to drink.

 

[Third World Aristocrat]

Nick's "inkaws" are being demonized now.

Yeah, actually, fuck off with that nonsense, Rekieta. I've been tracking every Woltjer, Sletta, Wright, and neighbor (Hatfield) I can find... plus your former church on occasion. No one reads as insane even remotely.

Correction, one does. YOU.

This tweet reminds me of a clip from his first YouTube appearance after being arrested, where he taught us how some people are incapable of realizing their own inadequacies despite the consequences of their failures.

Edited from an Elissa clips clip: https://youtu.be/9I2GaAJxgDs

In retrospect, Rekieta was probably talking about Aaron during this diatribe. It's impressive how accurately Rekieta's rants about Aaron describe them both. It's no wonder they are/were so enamored with each other.

 

[Folgers Can]

Yeah, actually, fuck off with that nonsense, Rekieta. I've been tracking every Woltjer, Sletta, Wright, and neighbor (Hatfield) I can find... plus your former church on occasion. No one reads as insane even remotely.
...
Edit to Add: As for who this particular in-law is... Dan Sletta (Kayla's stepdad) is the leading contender based on Occam's Razor and this:

Is the reporting sister-in-law in the mix? Sure. But it's Dan Sletta who is close to Pastor Melin.

To any extent that it narrows down the search for this mysterious hero, another bit of yesterday's tweetstorm added that he/she is A) someone he'd publicly call a "sub-80 IQ mongoloid" which isn't saying much when anyone within a 75-mile radius of Spicer fits that description to a big-brained Quora science expert like him, B) someone whose supposed schizoid ranting and raving continued until a recent enough point in time that Nick's still "about to" pursue an "HRO" if he/she keeps it up, C) someone whose upcoming HRO is "at the [sic] minimum" suggesting that he's also contemplating another defamation suit that would be hilarious to watch for whatever discovery bears out about a defense of truth, and D) someone far enough removed from the most closely connected core inlaws that Nick claims "ALL" other inlaws are starting to turn a corner on Nick being right and him/her being wrong:

[X] [A]

Who on earth could possibly check all these boxes? That level of hostility would seem to rule out Dan and Sharilynn in part because you'd think that after they stepped up to the plate with all that babysitting duty during the CHIPS case, a modicum of gratitude would not be out of line here (optimistic to ever expect that trait from Nick, I know). Moreover you'd think he'd be less inclined to so publicly burn bridges with Dan and Sharilynn when they'd be important to keep friendly for future babysitting and chauffeur duty whenever Bob and Celeste are too busy traveling the world, at least out of sheer self-interest that can motivate Nick even if gratitude isn't in his repertoire. For those reasons it's more likely to be that sister-in-law or some lesser-known cousin that Nick's threatened litigation will hopefully make famous.

 

[Vibralldo]

Nick claims "ALL" other inlaws are starting to turn a corner on Nick being right and him/her being wrong:

The inkaw was wrong about Nick being a drug addict that was creating an unsafe environment for his kids!

Sure, Nick admitted that he was doing cocaine in the same house as the kids, admitted it was a mistake that helped almost ruin his life, there's literal video evidence of him getting so fucked up that he's incoherent likely while the kids were in the house, he admitted to having a sidepiece that also put a strain on his marriage, and he plead guilty to everything the cops charged him with due to the inkaw's testimony, but...

Uh...

The inkaw was just wrong, OK!

 

[not william stenchever]

If you want a non-horseshit legal answer, tag somebody like @Potentially Criminal or @AnOminous.

I'm not a lawyer and my uneducated legal opinion would probably be more useful than any legal advice Rekieta has ever given. If I'm lucky and the gods look on me kindly my advice might even surpass 50/50 in terms of being useful. It takes a special kind of fuckup to have gone to law school and be so bad at it as Nikki-Boy.

 

[Captain Manning]

do you think i'd just forget and not post it?

Don't worry, pajeets aside, I think most people here are actually intelligent enough to understand that when you get the footage, we'll get the footage, and repeatedly asking you about it is pointless and annoying.

Just 1000 pages and I'll get to make a joke that's still funnier than any one of Nick's

If it's "ovar 9000" he did do that on the first stream he had Ty Beard on back in 2019.

Those were happier days

 

[Null]

dw I've not given up

 

[JamFlowMan]

If it's "ovar 9000" he did do that on the first stream he had Ty Beard on back in 2019.

Those were happier days

You know that clip of Norm Mcdonald looking at his co host, saying "9/11," and they both start laughing? I think the same thing happens with Nick and Ty when one of them says "Vic Mignogna."

 

[Melty Butter]

Here's my weak effort to understand Aaron's redacted text. I gave up about 3/4 of the way through and haven't tried putting it into AI.

It may help others to do a better job if they care to make sense of it.

I'm working with the following facts:
- Aaron briefly addressed the issue on Rumble STMS today (he caught a week YT suspension unrelated to Nick) at 4:37:00. "[Nick & Kayla] brought up the idea of buying the house... and then everything went to shit and it was all a disaster...[On the redacted text] people are coming to me and they're, like, 'do you have it?' and I'm, like, 'no, I don't have that fuckin' app. I don't know what that message said."
- Nick does not want to publicize whatever Aaron said. This means it was probably negative about April.
- Aaron sometimes writes with all-caps (see his tweets) and is a pretty basic dude probably trying to make peace. He "feels bad".
- Obvious context is 1) April 2) Aaron and April's relationship going to shit, and 3) Not buying the second home.

Nick's version of the context:



Credit to @Folgers Can for first efforts at tech deciphering wizardry.
Note: I didn't account for the spacing/number of letters very carefully.

"April is not happy and so it's probably better if we have some space right now [or something].
The house had a good hang out [other options: hang up/hanger/hangry/hangover/hanging] vibe but it's not going to work now.
All I know is that April and I are fighting all the time,
April more often ALTHOUGH I know I have made mistakes. [Or something with ALMOST?]
April's like an annoing junkie. [My own headcanon - this could be any number of things.]
I can't do this again if she ????????? and the all is
over [okay?] then it is meant to be.​

Take this all with a grain of salt. It's highly fictionalized. I'm not all that proud of my efforts.

 

[Potatoherder]

Or shooting televisions like Elvis.

That was actually super cool to do and with CRTs being collectable now i am sad people can't do it.

 

[Vibralldo]

Take this all with a grain of salt

Good work

It isn't super embarrassing to Nick, so I'm on the fence if this is what's actually said, but he could just be trying to not release too much info (for once)

 

[MunsterCheeseJr]

I saw these signs, and I thought of Nick right off the bat. I had not considered he might be a psychopath before. I just thought he was a run of the mill narcissist.

 

[Captain Manning]

This tweet reminds me of a clip from his first YouTube appearance after being arrested, where he taught us how some people are incapable of realizing their own inadequacies despite the consequences of their failures.

View attachment 6967172
Edited from an Elissa clips clip: https://youtu.be/9I2GaAJxgDs

In retrospect, Rekieta was probably talking about Aaron during this diatribe. It's impressive how accurately Rekieta's rants about Aaron describe them both. It's no wonder they are/were so enamored with each other.

I agree. He's ranting in a way where a viewer might think he's being self-critical, when he's talking about and thinking of Aaron all along.

I'd almost say what he did there was brilliant, but it also shows how utterly incapable of learning from his mistakes he is. So, in the end, he's just pathetic.

He's not sorry for what he did. He's sorry he got caught.

 

[Melty Butter]

Good work

It isn't super embarrassing to Nick, so I'm on the fence if this is what's actually said, but he could just be trying to not release too much info (for once)

Yeah, when trying to make out the DM I tried really hard to find a Kayla angle. That would be the easiest way to explain Nick's redaction.

It's pretty clear that Kayla has demanded that Nick not discuss her. He barely mentions her by name although his heavy implication, said repeatedly, that someone else was the reason for the swinging and drugs points the finger directly at Kayla.

There is plenty of text we can only guess about so perhaps it's there somewhere.

Edit to Add: New tweet. Never change, Nick. Never change.

 

[Get the rope Macaulay!]

You know that clip of Norm Mcdonald looking at his co host, saying "9/11," and they both start laughing? I think the same thing happens with Nick and Ty when one of them says "Vic Mignogna."

In a way, it could be a movie. Like a modern day 9 to 5. Just flip Nick and tys genders. Two ladies scam a guy accused of being a sex pest. Forcing him to do degenerate podcasts and shill like a used up whore. Stealing everything he has even his knives