He recently addressed this question in a call-in with Melton. It went like this:
> Melton, who is growing impatient (along with his audience) with Nick, prompted Nick to tell a salacious story about the polycule.
> Nick told the story about Aaron holding April's hand while Nick was railing her.
> Melton said, paraphrasing, 'Fuck, dude, you've gotta start streaming again to tell these stories!'
> In response, Nick explained that his audience doesn't want to hear these stories, and that's part of the reason he hasn't streamed.
He's correct but it's also convoluted thinking that reflects his own inner personal struggle.
Normie law nerds who are hanging on for dear life do not want to hear about bloody sheets and orgies but he
desperately wants to tell those stories. Meanwhile, he
hates his normie midwestern dad/husband existence but has chosen to live it.
To properly return to the Internet, he must atone for mistakes (drugs, the polycule) that he doesn't regard as mistakes. He's been pretty honest about that. He knows he must apologize, and yet he's not sorry. And, so, he doesn't. (There's a backwards integrity to that, I suppose.)
It reminded me of his
June 19, 2024 "comeback" stream:
At timestamp 7:16
"A
ny of you who want me to come out here and do some weird grandiose apology or prostrate myself in front of you, let me just help you with my Public Image right now. Fuck you right in your goddamn mouth."