Alcoholism Support Thread - Down the hatch

[Your Girlfriend's Dad]

Yeah you're right
Gomennasai

I'm seeing a doctor tomorrow

You're forgiven. This is a place where we talk about getting better. Even if we're not better, and I'm certainly not. I just can't feed into someone who's determined to kill themselves.

If you're taking that first step, you should know two things.

1: It is going to suck so bad, but then it won't.

2: I'm proud of you for doing it, and you should be too.

 

[MAAAD]

@MAAAD How are you today? Hoping you're feeling ok.

@Second Alter Ego Bud i think you're thriving off the negative attention. I'm rooting for you, but I don't think I can reply to you without being part of the problem. Please get some help, this is the last time I'll say it. I watch people like you die every week, I'm not interested in doing it for free.

I'm fine, thanks. Probably won't be drinking again any time soon.

 

[Second Alter Ego]

I was like "aw shit I'm not going to drink anymore after today, going away party time" which of course meant drinking til unresponsive and my bf dragged me into the shower trying to wake me up and
first thought iin my head waking up in bed however many hours later with the spins is "more, more, more, more I want more"
I am so fucking retarded
Have I learned my lesson? No but water it is

 

[Sparkletor 2.0]

I was like "aw shit I'm not going to drink anymore after today, going away party time" which of course meant drinking til unresponsive and my bf dragged me into the shower trying to wake me up and
first thought iin my head waking up in bed however many hours later with the spins is "more, more, more, more I want more"
I am so fucking retarded
Have I learned my lesson? No but water it is

Are you retarded or are you addicted? Addiction can happen to anyone no matter how smart or stupid they are. You can't outsmart your addiction. The only way to beat it is by not drinking.

The need to drink when you know what the consequences are going to be is part of the insanity they talk about in alcoholics anonymous. It's not that you are retarded. I imagine most of us here have been there.

 

[Jerk Sausage]

Another nice bit is the rhetorical test to try some "controlled drinking". A non-alcoholic should have 0 issues with alcohol being in the house, having literally a single drink, and then not thinking about it for days, weeks or months.

Most who are even considering the possibility of whether or not they are an alcoholic would know this is a ridiculous proposal. One drink is never enough, therefore even one drink is too many. There's an "insidious insanity" driving an alcoholic towards having that first drink, regardless of the knowledge that it will lead to many more. That's the "powerlessness over alcohol". Step one is admitting that's your nature. By logic, controlled drinking is an impossibility when consumption becomes uncontrolled once it's in your system.

Another AA device is to identify the rationalizations:
- I don't drink as much as those real alcoholics, despite all the problems drinking brings me.
- It's not bad enough to go to the hospital over, despite the terrible effects I was experiencing due to alcohol.
- I bought the stuff, therefore I must drink it.

It's all very common once you hear stories from other alcoholics, no matter the length of sobriety.

As Sparkletor said, go easy on yourself with the self-pity. To face your failures with honesty does not require that you beat yourself up at the same time.

 

[Lovely Kin]

Feels like the progress I made over the past few years is quickly unraveling. This year has been straining at me which only pushes me towards drinking my emotions away. I blacked out around midnight and struggling with an awful hangover.

 

[Hey Johnny Bravo]

Feels like the progress I made over the past few years is quickly unraveling. This year has been straining at me which only pushes me towards drinking my emotions away. I blacked out around midnight and struggling with an awful hangover.

One of the things they teach you in AA is that you have to learn to get used to negative emotions. You are going to have hard times, bad days, and negative emotions. What you can't do is let them drive you to drink. It's okay to feel upset, or angry, or sad, or anxious. It's also okay to talk to a friend about it instead of bottling it up and making it worse.

 

[⋖ cørdion ⋗]

One of the things they teach you in AA is that you have to learn to get used to negative emotions. You are going to have hard times, bad days, and negative emotions. What you can't do is let them drive you to drink. It's okay to feel upset, or angry, or sad, or anxious. It's also okay to talk to a friend about it instead of bottling it up and making it worse.

Me: hunger isnt a bad thing, i can live through it with no issues
also me: AAH BORED, GOTTA DRINK LEST I HAVE NOTHING TO DO!

I've relapsed a few times lately, all of them bad. I thought I could play TF2 sober but I just cant do voice activity without alcohol. Yet, I know that I don't want to actually gain from it. Nobody hangs out in gaming parties anymore, so why befriend a stray on TF2 here and there? I've seen what the server is like while sober and I'd never want to be considered part of that if not for being shitfaced.

 

[Hey Johnny Bravo]

Me: hunger isnt a bad thing, i can live through it with no issues
also me: AAH BORED, GOTTA DRINK LEST I HAVE NOTHING TO DO!

I've relapsed a few times lately, all of them bad. I thought I could play TF2 sober but I just cant do voice activity without alcohol. Yet, I know that I don't want to actually gain from it. Nobody hangs out in gaming parties anymore, so why befriend a stray on TF2 here and there? I've seen what the server is like while sober and I'd never want to be considered part of that if not for being shitfaced.

If you only enjoy doing something while drunk, then it's possible you don't like doing it. It's just a vehicle for drinking.

 

[Your Girlfriend's Dad]

Me: hunger isnt a bad thing, i can live through it with no issues
also me: AAH BORED, GOTTA DRINK LEST I HAVE NOTHING TO DO!

I've relapsed a few times lately, all of them bad. I thought I could play TF2 sober but I just cant do voice activity without alcohol. Yet, I know that I don't want to actually gain from it. Nobody hangs out in gaming parties anymore, so why befriend a stray on TF2 here and there? I've seen what the server is like while sober and I'd never want to be considered part of that if not for being shitfaced.

So I've got good news: That actually gets better.

Part of fucking around with your GABA and Dopamine levels constantly is that you experience anhedonia, or the inability to feel joy, when you're sober. Your body needs to not only return to normal, but set the marker flags for where normal is supposed to be.

It's a symptom just like the shakes and the night sweats, and it will go away. Trust the process. You'll enjoy the things you used to enjoy.

 

[Hey Johnny Bravo]

So I've got good news: That actually gets better.

Part of fucking around with your GABA and Dopamine levels constantly is that you experience anhedonia, or the inability to feel joy, when you're sober. Your body needs to not only return to normal, but set the marker flags for where normal is supposed to be.

It's a symptom just like the shakes and the night sweats, and it will go away. Trust the process. You'll enjoy the things you used to enjoy.

Feeling anhedonic for the first few weeks or months of sobriety is normal. As YGD said, it's part of your body returning to baseline. You just have to keep trying to do the shit you used to do sober. If all you do is sit around feeling sorry for yourself and ruminating, you will go back to drinking.

 

[56 others]

It's crazy how dogshit you look when you drink. Dark bags under your eyes from the alcohol inhibiting healing and the shitty sleep I drink myself into. Blotchy skin. FAT

 

[Hey Johnny Bravo]

It's crazy how dogshit you look when you drink. Dark bags under your eyes from the alcohol inhibiting healing and the shitty sleep I drink myself into. Blotchy skin. FAT

There's a guy who came into my meeting about four months ago and the difference in how he looks between now and then is night and day.

 

[Your Girlfriend's Dad]

There's a guy who came into my meeting about four months ago and the difference in how he looks between now and then is night and day.

People should take a picture when they decide to get sober and then take another picture at 90 days. It's hard to see the change in real time but it's drastic.

 

[Hey Johnny Bravo]

People should take a picture when they decide to get sober and then take another picture at 90 days. It's hard to see the change in real time but it's drastic.

I see pictures of myself back when I was drinking and it's rough.

Anyway, it's another sober day for me. One day at a time, like always. I hope the rest of you are trying to do the right thing. It's better to post here or pick up a phone and call a buddy than it is to pick up another drink.

 

[neger psykolog]

People should take a picture when they decide to get sober and then take another picture at 90 days. It's hard to see the change in real time but it's drastic.

I just caught up with a friend who hasn't seen me in a few months and he was surprised how much better I'm looking (plus lost weight).
But yeah definitely the improved sleep quality adds up to a lot in terms of quality of life.

 

[Your Girlfriend's Dad]

I just caught up with a friend who hasn't seen me in a few months and he was surprised how much better I'm looking (plus lost weight).
But yeah definitely the improved sleep quality adds up to a lot in terms of quality of life.

That's awesome man. Yeah I always wondered why I had trouble sleeping when I was wasted half the week. Like, duh.

 

[Hey Johnny Bravo]

I just caught up with a friend who hasn't seen me in a few months and he was surprised how much better I'm looking (plus lost weight).
But yeah definitely the improved sleep quality adds up to a lot in terms of quality of life.

Good on you, dude. Keep at it.

Reading this thread and even some lolcow threads on the site should be all the evidence people need that being sober is the better choice nowadays. It's not fun anymore. The drugs and alcohol are bad and the people are fucked up. People aren't having crazy fun parties anymore - it's a lot of sad sacks harming themselves, doing cringey shit, and then acting confused when shit goes south.

 

[Second Alter Ego]

Has anyone tried topamax before

2: I'm proud of you for doing it, and you should be too.

No I just feel this unending puddle of shame and I want to back out so bad
I don't do well with positive reinforcement so all the patronizing "YAAAY YOU FINALLY ASKED FOR HELP GOOD JOB" at the doctor's office just left me deeply mortified and regretting saying anything at all
I don't think I can do this

 

[Your Girlfriend's Dad]

Has anyone tried topamax before

No I just feel this unending puddle of shame and I want to back out so bad
I don't do well with positive reinforcement so all the patronizing "YAAAY YOU FINALLY ASKED FOR HELP GOOD JOB" at the doctor's office just left me deeply mortified and regretting saying anything at all
I don't think I can do this

Then don't do it for reinforcement, do it so you won't be the unbelievable fucking retard you were yesterday. Be marginally less of a burden on everyone who interacts with you. It's not easy, because not being a piece of shit often isn't.

It's worth it though. Once you don't feel awful and you actively start to address the shitty things that plague your life, fucking magically, your existence starts to improve.