Jason Thor Hall / PirateSoftware / Maldavius Figtree / DarkSphere Creations / Maldavius / Thorwich / Witness X / @PotatoSec - Incompetent Furry Programmer, Blizzard Nepo Baby, Lies about almost every thing in his life, Industry Shill, Carried by his father, Hate boner against Ross Scott of Accursed Farms, False Flagger

[Hooked on phobics]

My cat died a bit ago, but having her for 14 years I can do some quick math. It would take about a minute or 2 to feed her, all her food stuff was in a specific cupboard and it was very quick to feed her. Wet can and some kibble. She would get fed twice a day minimum. So, 730 feedings in a year. Assuming each one is 1 minute long of work, comes out to 10,220 feedings in her life, and that would be 10,220 minutes of work, do the time math, 60 minutes in an hour, 24 hours in a day. Comes out to about one week worth of time spent feeding the cat over 14 years I had her. That's minimum by the way. Not including any additional treats or if there was a small mid day feeding either.

What gets me the most was he got up, saw the empty food bowl, and still refused. Had he 100% ignored the cat and never investigated, even with the cat going hungry you can kinda excuse it via ignorance. But since he went TO the bowl, 90% of the job (walking there) is already done anyway, so refusing is just spite towards a small animal that has no power.

LAZYNESS, PURE LAZYNESS, is a better look than that.

Its been joked about how its the same as his wow roaching, I think he has a thing for fucking people over when its plausibly deniable. He seemed to enjoy his team dying in wow, and I sense he enjoyed letting the cat go hungry.

 

[米津玄師]

Slop slop slop!

Sometimes I'm glad I check "Newest first" ever so often. As far as I can tell it's not a copypasta from anywhere and this random guy took a passage from the Silmarillion, applied it to Mald, and posted it on this video of all places.

 

[Aurellia Spaghettellia]

Poor Jake went to lunch 3:30 PM his local time but came back 10 minutes later b.c the players found an abuse and Jason is upset. Reminder Jake also has another job.

edit, maldy debugs: "Jake I'm sure it was your implementation. Your implementation caused this. Can you send me the code in DMs? I don't know where that is."
"I don't know where that is in the repository. Can you send me? I'm sure it is this." (reads DMs) "That's weird dude. That's a crazy bug. I've never seen anything like it."

 

[Slav Power]

Slop slop slop!

Harmful Opinions is that exceedingly rare low sugar, low fat, high protein slop. The good stuff.

 

[Hakase Shinonome]

Niggers in his discord are anxious about the roommate interview. Bad time to be a Maldavius paypig,

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Piece of what pie mother fucker? These people are so fucking stupid!


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I hope this guy holds his breath for that, so he passes out and bangs his empty fucking head on the ground and dies.


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WOW REALLY?! SO WEIRD HES SO HECKIN COOL AND DOWN TO EARTH WHY THO????


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These people will defend him until their dying breath because if they actually stand up to his bullshit, they will look like even bigger retards. It truly is a dilemma with being such a fan and having parasocial relationships.

 

[Hakase Shinonome]

Seriously, he has the swearing filter on in his discord? How many kids has he fucking trapped in there....?

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Meanwhile Maldo is being mogged by cow royalty (clipped for brevity, dead air, chair reacts, cat herding, tangents, etc):

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Spoiler: Original Youtube Video

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Spoiler: Original Youtube Video

It's either this:
View attachment 7681015 or this View attachment 7681017

It's impressive how much he knows while not knowing him; but even this absolute retard actually knows about- and read what SKG is about. Really shows how absolutely, clinically fucking retarded Mr. Ferretfucker is.

 

[p1138]

These people will defend him until their dying breath because if they actually stand up to his bullshit, they will look like even bigger retards. It truly is a dilemma with being such a fan and having parasocial relationships.

"We have to be serious" "We have the chance" Because the grown ass nepo baby of a man can't defend himself.

"I wonder if thor's other old co-workers will come forward in defense"
Why the fuck would they? If we assume anyone that was a co-worker of his back then still has a professional career somewhere, hitching their post to Mald in defense of him wouldn't accomplish anything positive in their lives. And if they are addicted to the internet specifically social media; why would they want whatever "brand" or "identity" they've established tainted by defending this retard?

 

[The ATF Disliked That]

Poor Jake went to lunch 3:30 PM his local time but came back 10 minutes later b.c the players found an abuse and Jason is upset. Reminder Jake also has another job.

I think Jake needs to consider new employment.

What gets me the most was he got up, saw the empty food bowl, and still refused. Had he 100% ignored the cat and never investigated, even with the cat going hungry you can kinda excuse it via ignorance. But since he went TO the bowl, 90% of the job (walking there) is already done anyway, so refusing is just spite towards a small animal that has no power.

LAZYNESS, PURE LAZYNESS, is a better look than that.

Its been joked about how its the same as his wow roaching, I think he has a thing for fucking people over when its plausibly deniable. He seemed to enjoy his team dying in wow, and I sense he enjoyed letting the cat go hungry.

Yeah, that's absolutely scummy shit and I hope he has to SAW II his eyeball with a spoon at some point in his life.

 

[Vibe_Guy]

Harmful Opinions is that exceedingly rare low sugar, low fat, high protein slop. The good stuff.`

My fav slop is "Legal Mindset" guy because I'd unironically hire him as a lawyer if I ever need him (which will never happen for various reasons, but he seems to be acting in good faith towards whoever he is advising). Nigga passed the bar only to Jewtube his way into analyzing legal intricacies of everyday YT squabbles. Which is more entertaining than reading up laws and case studies yourself while almost equally informative (cope, it's not as informative, it is fun though).

"Breaking Federal law" sounds scary and harsh, however in this case the law broken is serious but not "drug trafficking/smuggling" serious. So he'll get roasted by the internet while suffering a substantial fine.

L

If this ferretfucker tries to pull the "it was unintentional" card.... AND IT WORKS, I will smash the nearest drywall then eat said drywall.

 

[Kuritan Deplorable]

I could ALMOST see him going the direction of a cult with his situation, like a full ON cult

Yea, the only thing that really stops him is his complete disregard for others. Jason couldn't even lead a suicide cult because he'd care about owning his critics more than he'd care about delivering his followers to salvation. There's no room for other people in his ideology, there's just him, and useful fools.

It's especially enjoyable to see the walls closing in (new slop, new wiki, new haters) while he's under "work" pressure and not just playing vidya.

Maybe he'll have a bit of a pressure snap and have one of those career defining off the cuff oops moments on stream. Seems in line with his trajectory so far.

 

[Kiislova]

I hope this guy holds his breath for that, so he passes out and bangs his empty fucking head on the ground and dies.

Reminds me of that "The black community isn't helping Jussie Smollett hate crime by staying silent" and then Dave Chapelle said on a show that "we were helping him, by staying silent. Because we KNEW the guy was a lying!"

Normal people close to Mald are shutting the fuck up because anything they'd say would be detrimental to Mald.

 

[Maeis]

What gets me the most was he got up, saw the empty food bowl, and still refused. Had he 100% ignored the cat and never investigated, even with the cat going hungry you can kinda excuse it via ignorance. But since he went TO the bowl, 90% of the job (walking there) is already done anyway, so refusing is just spite towards a small animal that has no power.

LAZYNESS, PURE LAZYNESS, is a better look than that.

Its been joked about how its the same as his wow roaching, I think he has a thing for fucking people over when its plausibly deniable. He seemed to enjoy his team dying in wow, and I sense he enjoyed letting the cat go hungry.

to be a billion quadrillion more charitable than I should be, as a cat owner you want to feed the cat twice a day at specific times, otherwise if you're not a work-from-home guy the cat will..

i just realized everything before this is bullshit, because he is a work from home guy. I do that with my cat so she's not freaking out while I'm at work.

 

[The Grand Miser]

Listening to Theo and Prime's videos about this, the only time they both give credit to Mald for moving a puzzle along is a picture equation puzzle.
Link | Archive

Prime wrote code to solve it as the substitution said how to manipulate it further to get the actual answer. It sounds like Prime did a lot of heavy lifting and is humble enough to downplay it. Both Theo and Prime share segments of their code and are eager to talk about how they solved their portions, I don't know if Mald ever went into details on the puzzles on his own channels.

I'm still going through the thread, so I don't know if someone else already went over this defcon puzzle which according to Theo, Jason helped solve. The part Jason gets credit for is figuring out what number each bottle represents. The solution, is honestly not too difficult, and much simpler than what Theo implies in the video.

Spoiler: Puzzle Solution

The first instinct is to solve it as a normal substitution puzzle, which will quickly reach a dead end. There are simply too many variables and not enough equations to do that. So instead, I thought that there could be meaning to the color and shape of the bottles, which is where it all comes together.

There are a total of 7 different colors and 4 bottle shapes. The first 6 lines of the puzzle only use the square bottles, and are very simple. So simple in fact, that they perfectly line up with the colors of the rainbow. RedSquare=0, OrangeSquare=1, YellowSquare=2 etc.

The 7th line has VioletSquare(6)+OrangeSquare(1)=RedCircle. Since the colors wrap back to red, it indicates that the bottles work as a base 7 number system, with the colors representing the single digit, and the shape representing the tens digit. For those who don't know what I'm blabbing about here, base 7 simply means that all numbers are made out of a total of 7 different digits. For example, base 10 (decimal), is what we normally use which has all 10 digits, and base 2 (binary), has only 2 digits and is used by computers. So with a few base 7 calculations, we can reason that square=0x, circle=1x, triangle=2x and hexagon=3x, where x is any digit between 0-6.

The last part of the puzzle is what we do once we reach 40 (in base 7), since there are only 4 bottle shapes. For that we have the solution in row 11, where VioletHexagon(36)+OrangeSquare(1)=40 (in base 7)=RedSquare(0). From that it is clear that from any result over 40, we simply remove 40 to get the correct bottle.

That's it. Here is the full solution, which you can also verify:

So this is what Theo, in his word, feels so bad about for "Math god Thor": a puzzle that pretty much only requires knowledge of a freshman year university math concept. The puzzle that pretty much walks you through it to help you figure out what number each bottle represents once you understand the base 7 gimmick.

The thing is, that was the easy part. The hard part is this:

You add the potions in each slot together according to the base 7 rules to get a bunch of numbers. Now what do you do with said numbers? I couldn't be arsed to find out, there's a lot you can do with them, and the puzzle hints that you need to run them through some kind of cipher. From the video, according to someone on the team, it took them 14 hours to figure it out. What's important here, is that Jason only gets explicitly credited for the easy part of this puzzle. Solving the hard part was a team effort, to which Jason may or may not have contributed, Theo does not credit him explicitly here.

So why am I writing this long-ass post about this? Because Jason for some reason wants to be seen as a puzzle solving genius, and the fact that he only gets credited for the easy part of this puzzle is genuinely funny to me.

 

[NeoMorgan]

What gets me the most was he got up, saw the empty food bowl, and still refused. Had he 100% ignored the cat and never investigated, even with the cat going hungry you can kinda excuse it via ignorance. But since he went TO the bowl, 90% of the job (walking there) is already done anyway, so refusing is just spite towards a small animal that has no power.

LAZYNESS, PURE LAZYNESS, is a better look than that.

Its been joked about how its the same as his wow roaching, I think he has a thing for fucking people over when its plausibly deniable. He seemed to enjoy his team dying in wow, and I sense he enjoyed letting the cat go hungry.

Jason failed such a basic test of empathy. A hungry cat is asking for food, Jason knows this, and he refuses to feed the cat out of sheer spite, and possibly malice. If the faggot can't be bothered to feed a cat i doubt he's taking good care of the ferrets in his "rescue."

 

[Necrosan]

Piece of what pie mother fucker? These people are so fucking stupid!

Influencers often pay the people they invite, I wouldn't put it past someone who knew Mald to just spill some beans and get an easy paycheck. I can understand the sentiment but Mald pretty much invited the vultures on himself by acting like a faggot on the Internet.

That said, it's shocking to me how people that grew up in this drama environment seem to understand so little about it. "They just want a paycheck!", like, yeah you dumbfuck they see the easy dollar signs, today is Mald and tomorrow it'll be someone else.

If Mald was right and Ross was a fucktard who made a shitty petition that would've been harmful, we'd see videos titled "HOW MALDAVIUS FIGTREE SAVED VIDEOGAMES!".

 

[A T.V. Hating Mutant]

Influencers often pay the people they invite,

True. I suppose in this instance I don't believe that to be the case, but that's assumption on my part.

The thought that someone would come forward and just be honest when speaking about him seems to be a hard concept for them to grasp.



Bro if this guy says, "hey Jake" one more time in his stream. He's always outing himself as having no coder knowledge, but just won't stop chasing that '1337 haxxor' dragon, shits funny.

 

[Facom]

It's going to he hilarious when Jason has to fire some of his mods/staff after having to downsize after this huge fall in subs he's having, especially since he said this:

 

[Jester Who Didn't Laugh]

My fav slop is "Legal Mindset" guy because I'd unironically hire him as a lawyer if I ever need him (which will never happen for various reasons, but he seems to be acting in good faith towards whoever he is advising). Nigga passed the bar only to Jewtube his way into analyzing legal intricacies of everyday YT squabbles. Which is more entertaining than reading up laws and case studies yourself while almost equally informative (cope, it's not as informative, it is fun though).

"Breaking Federal law" sounds scary and harsh, however in this case the law broken is serious but not "drug trafficking/smuggling" serious. So he'll get roasted by the internet while suffering a substantial fine.
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L

If this ferretfucker tries to pull the "it was unintentional" card.... AND IT WORKS, I will smash the nearest drywall then eat said drywall.

I would love to hear Leagl Eagle take on this. He likes to roast the shit out of dumb people doing illegal things.

 

[DubyaD4D]

Oh shit poopgnome might become widespread big day for mald hate

I just can't wait for the fecally stained terracotta gnome to be known and acknowledged by the vast portion of the masses, and constantly brought up around Jason.
He can't hide it for much longer, he will have to acknowledge it in some capacity! One of the few things he has the mental capacity to not bring up and address.

Besides the gnome, and this thread, is there anything else he knows to never give the light of day to and doesn't?

 

[Necrosan]

It's going to he hilarious when Jason has to fire some of his mods/staff after having to downsize after this huge fall in subs he's having, especially since he said this:

I can't believe these people are real:

The video itself is the most bare bones analogy for "don't splurge because problems can arise", which is the most basic economic advice you could give to someone and yet he has this titled "The Tank" and uploaded it separately as if it's something people have never heard of before.

This is beyond loving the smell of your own farts, holy shit.