Careercow Robert Chipman / Bob / Moviebob / "Movieblob" - Middle-Aged Consoomer, CWC with a Thesaurus, Ardent Male Feminist and Superior Futurist, the Twice-Fired, the Mario-Worshipper, publicly dismantled by Hot Dog Girl, now a diabetic

[NQ 952]

New poll is up for 30 days, the last option is a collective punishment because you all won't give me poll ideas.

:islamic: choice here.

Have you ever seen obese lesbian porn? Well, it would be simmering something like that, only Dobson would probably have an amputation fetish and suckle on Bobs two stumps, while Bob eats Dobsons numb, pre diabetic toes (they have the flavor and texture of Lucky Charms, you know).

 

[Godzilla@1989]

New poll is up for 30 days, the last option is a collective punishment because you all won't give me poll ideas.

:islamic: choice as well.

They would lick each other's titties while Bob does a lap dance on Dobson. They would each grind on each other to the Mario theme as well in nasty fashion. Then they would fuck each other in the ass in the ultimate gay bear porn.

 

[The Manglement]

The poll doesn't have the obvious answer: they'll both spend their time tweeting, and not bother talking to the other. Why bother with real life interactions when you can have twitter-friend asspats and block any meanies who do things like bring up your frequent calls for genocide.

 

[Done]

The poll doesn't have the obvious answer: they'll both spend their time tweeting, and not bother talking to the other. Why bother with real life interactions when you can have twitter-friend asspats and block any meanies who do things like bring up your frequent calls for genocide.

Dobson is banned from Twitter, at least that's how it was the last time I checked on his thread.

 

[Godzilla@1989]

Dobson is banned from Twitter, at least that's how it was the last time I checked on his thread.

So what social media sites does he has to use instead to post his cringe then?

 

[Done]

So what social media sites does he has to use instead to post his cringe then?

I think Facebook is his go-to place now. You can check his thread for more info.

 

[Godzilla@1989]

I think Facebook is his go-to place now. You can check his thread for more info.

Didn’t Bob had a Facebook previously?

 

[The Nothingness]

Given the likelihood this will happen, I can see Bob making a set of tweets regarding Deadpool 2 could knock Infinity War off the the #1 box office spot and him hoping that Solo will make Deadpool 2 only #1 for one week.

 

[Gordon Cole]

Because heaven forbid we still talk to our loved ones despite political disagreements.

Oh yeah, he's still terrible when it comes to vidya.

 

[thismanlies]

>Garfield Warriors

A game where you raid castles and shit just so you can eat everything in sight.

Sounds like it'd be right up Bob's alley.

 

[Kyria the Great]

>Garfield Warriors

A game where you raid castles and shit just so you can eat everything in sight.

Sounds like it'd be right up Bob's alley.

I always love that all of his "original" ideas are just shitty crossovers of childish and adult media. Are we sure that Chris Chan isn't his long lost relative?

 

[Pokemonquistador]

So last time I checked, Dynasty Warriors was a game franchise where you get to play any of a number of God-Tier warriors who get to blast away insignificant peons on the battlefield without much risk to yourself. Geez, I wonder why a guy like Bob would like it so much... Of course, Bob's just waiting for the "Dudebro" edition to come out so he can play a strong, independent woman of color roundhouse-kicking his(her?) way across a field full of Trump-voting Cletuses. Either that or he wants to play a reenactment of that scene from the Kingsman movie where the Christian fundamentalists get slaughtered, (you know, the scene you could practically hear him fapping over during his review of the movie?)

 

[thismanlies]

I always love that all of his "original" ideas are just shitty crossovers of childish and adult media. Are we sure that Chris Chan isn't his long lost relative?

I just imagined Bob coming up with his own Mario/Marvel crossover comic.

It'd start with Super Mahvel-O having to save Peach Girl from the clutches of Captain Dee Cee and his army of white midwestern troglodyte minions. Then Bob would magically appear and declare himself the father of Mahvel-O, which everyone seems to accept for no reason. Once Bob makes his presence known, the real enemies would come out. The sugary temptress Dia-Betty, the Mayonnaise Ghoul, Peach Girl's arch nemesis Freeze Peach, the Bernie Bro, and their leader Donald De Fuhrer will all team up in a vain effort to take down Bob and his merry band of Mary Sue inserts. By the time Issue 10 hits the presses, Bob will emerge from his basement cave and come up with a half baked plan to cure the troglodyte virus by injecting his own blood into the food served at midwestern fast food restaurants, thus creating the Superior Future where Hillary Clinton will descend from the heavens and take her rightful place in the smoldering ruins of the White (power) House.

 

[BubbleButt]

Oh yeah, he's still terrible when it comes to vidya.

Garfield Warriors made me go blind with rage for a few seconds because I know he's not memeing.

 

[Gordon Cole]

Sociopoliticsbob.

Crossover with Chu.

Milking his dead family for all it's worth.

And also:

I'm sorry, Joy? Joy? What is it about this dishonest, egotistical moron that screams "Joy"? Cause he'll like anything with Winninz/Pee-oh-Sees regardless of quality like a baby with keys jingling in it's face? Is that it?

 

[Godzilla@1989]

Bob's just waiting for the "Dudebro" edition to come out so he can play a strong, independent woman of color roundhouse-kicking his(her?) way across a field full of Trump-voting Cletuses.

No, he wants to play a fat, diabetic, man child dressed up as Mario beating up Trump supporters so he can rescue Princess Hillary from Browser Drumpf.

 

[Positron]

What fucking "huge and dangerous concessions" can Trump promise Kim? Though to be honest if Trump offers the whole California to DPNK I'd be singing praise to Allah.

 

[Gordon Cole]

Feminist.

And tax sperging.

 

[Brother Wind]

So last time I checked, Dynasty Warriors was a game franchise where you get to play any of a number of God-Tier warriors who get to blast away insignificant peons on the battlefield without much risk to yourself. Geez, I wonder why a guy like Bob would like it so much... Of course, Bob's just waiting for the "Dudebro" edition to come out so he can play a strong, independent woman of color roundhouse-kicking his(her?) way across a field full of Trump-voting Cletuses. Either that or he wants to play a reenactment of that scene from the Kingsman movie where the Christian fundamentalists get slaughtered, (you know, the scene you could practically hear him fapping over during his review of the movie?)

So Dynasty Warriors is a series based on the novel Romance of the Three kingdoms. And the reason they are godlike in the game is because the story spells out impressive these people are. Like these guys are just so good compared to your average soldier. Which highlights the Chinese idea of meritocracy and elites.

I bring you all this autism because if you wanna know how little Bob knows about the shit he talks about, he had a game that lines up with ideological vision, and he isn't even aware.

 

[LastOfTheMohicans]

Feminist.
View attachment 450923

And tax sperging.
View attachment 450924

Let's humor Bob for a moment.

I'll near-guarantee he is in the 22% tax bracket, if Geek.com and Screen whatever the fuck pay him enough to put his earnings over 83k I'm going to have a stroke at the fact that he complains about money troubles.

So he pays 22% taxes like me. He also pays the other half of medicare and social security. Usually you pay half while your employer pays the other half. He's self employed so he pays both halves.

We do have to make some assumptions so that we're not going crazy with math and unknown variables:

• His only income is Patreon
  
• His current Patreon income ($4,564/mo) is consistent through the year.

At a base level, Google's quick calculator says he should make about $54,768 this year.

There are several online calculators that help determine how much you pay in your self-employment taxes. I've used the one provided by TaxACT. According to this calculator, he will be paying $7738 over the course of a year.

That's ALREADY not nearly as bad as you would think. But remember, your self-employment tax is really just the fact that, since you are your own employer, you have to pay both halves of medicare and social security. So, really, when it comes to how much worse he has it than people who get W-2's, it's really only half that, or $3,869, according to google dot com's calculator, but I'll stop posting screenshots.

Now, let's amortize that out even further, because that's three thousand, eight hundred sixty-nine United States Petrodollars over the course of a year he pays in more taxes than someone who gets a W-2. According to my trusty numbermajig he's paying $322.42 per month more than standard waged employees.

Cry me a fucking river, Bob. You can't fit $330 a month out of $4600 into your damn budget? Not to mention the amount you fucking spend on stupid video game ephemera and seeing Marvel capeshit movies like Black Panther ten times -- BECAUSE IT'S YOUR JOB -- that you can itemize as deductions you probably get to pay even less than me in taxes.

Learn to manage your money.