Careercow Robert Chipman / Bob / Moviebob / "Movieblob" - Middle-Aged Consoomer, CWC with a Thesaurus, Ardent Male Feminist and Superior Futurist, the Twice-Fired, the Mario-Worshipper, publicly dismantled by Hot Dog Girl, now a diabetic

[Jetpack Himmler]

https://twitter.com/the_moviebob/status/1089942154644987906
View attachment 651171 From the end of the video (I didn't listen to the rest because Bob is a bore)

"[something something diversity] I mean, since objective best movie is otherwise impossible to determine, what else do you get out this trophy for? The main cool historic thing is that this was nominated (...) But to the extent that I'll root for anything this year, I'll probably root for this one because I just don't know how you get to 'this can't possibly win best picture' and still say 'best picture really means anything anymore' or that it's at least fulfilling the purpose 'best picture' was ever meant to."

If it's for the reasons Bob wants it to, then no it shouldn't. He can prattle on about how "historically significant" BP is, but he only loves the film because he sees it as a validation of his political beliefs.

 

[Kyria the Great]

If it's for the reasons Bob wants it to, then no it shouldn't. He can prattle on about how "historically significant" BP is, but he only loves the film because he sees it as a validation of his political beliefs.

Yeah, a cynical corporate product made for mass appeal, sounds like a winner for Bob. (Note: Black Panther is an alright film and if people genuinely like it, that is fine. The crowd for best picture is silly though as very few genre movies can even attempt to pull that off)

 

[Koochiching]

Moar politisperging, and some defending m’lady kamala as well.
View attachment 651175

That Imani Gandy character is fucking exceptional too, and may herself warrant a thread. She is the queen of using her identity as a cover for saying stupid shit.

 

[RockVolnutt]

If it's for the reasons Bob wants it to, then no it shouldn't. He can prattle on about how "historically significant" BP is, but he only loves the film because he sees it as a validation of his political beliefs.

"He sees it as" are key words here considering he's never really shown to comment on the contents of the movie besides "It has black people" and that asinine "This is what Africa should've and COULD'VE been without whites!" plot that every other critic thinks was in the movie instead of being their fetish producing a fanfic that actively contradicts the movie.

 

[Anonymus Fluhre]

Since when is Scorpion a good guy?

Maybe because he's a father since the old 1990's book? I personally always found Kuai Liang to be "good", he wanted to find his brothers murderer only to "befriend" him in two timelines. He also has an interesting ending in DC vs Mortal Kombat. Most of his story is always about him trying to save people while literally fighting off his past. Hanzo Hasashi spent most of his stories either being a slave to the Nether Realm and necromancers or seeking vengeance for the sake of vengeance which lead to the terrible story in the MK9 comic. It's almost like Bob just reads wikis on characters and never played the games or read the endings...Nah that can't be, he's a reviewer/ critic of fine entertainment content.

 

[Godzilla@1989]

Why would Bob only read wikis in regards to knowledge?

 

[Doctor of Autism]

Why would Bob only read wikis in regards to knowledge?

To make himself seem like more of a pop culture expert

 

[Godzilla@1989]

To make himself seem like more of a pop culture expert

Wikis to me are sketchy because anyone could edit them with permission.

 

[Cleric of Autism]

Wikis to me are sketchy because anyone could edit them with permission.

Congratulations on being something Bob is not; a rational thinking human being

 

[Iceland Heavy]

We could have a fun game taking famous 80's era/popular cult movies and rewriting them as if they were one of Bob's screen treatments.

Let's see. Ferris Bueller's Day Off: Ferris and Cameron are reimagined as women on the lam from the law after they kill Cameron's abusive, redneck, blue collar father, steal his classic Mustang, and tool around Chicago, Thelma and Louise style. They're spotted and chased by their evil, homophobic school principal Ed Rooney, after the latter sees them dancing and kissing each other on TV in a Pussy Hat Rally held in downtown Chicago. The film ends with them tearfully driving the mustang off of the Sears Tower as the local authorities close in, Blues-Brothers-style.

Terminator: The Superior Future War - Skynet is actually a benevolent ruler and is bringing about a utopian Star Trek future but gets blown up at its inception by time travelling angry mayonnaise ghoul luddites that are just mad their jerbs are being automated away - wait, that's actually a retarded idea of his.

 

[Ow The Edge]

Terminator: The Superior Future War - Skynet is actually a benevolent ruler and is bringing about a utopian Star Trek future but gets blown up at its inception by time travelling angry mayonnaise ghoul luddites that are just mad their jerbs are being automated away - wait, that's actually a exceptional idea of his.

If you wanna go crazy with Terminator it'd be way more fun to see the Adeptus Mechanicus travel back in time to either stop the Abominable Intelligence or worship it as the Omnissiah. But then I doubt Bob knows what 40k is.

 

[Mola Ram]

If you wanna go crazy with Terminator it'd be way more fun to see the Adeptus Mechanicus travel back in time to either stop the Abominable Intelligence or worship it as the Omnissiah. But then I doubt Bob knows what 40k is.

I guess even Bob has his good points.

 

[Brother Wind]

Bob is a fucking simpleton that thinks that because a character is popular, they are or should be the protagonist.

He probably has the ppinion that the Boba Fette movie was a good concept

Oh for fuck sake thats probably it. Look at you fools thinking he even bothered reading a wiki.

He probably just figured the most popular ninja was the good guy.

 

[Godzilla@1989]

Terminator: The Superior Future War - Skynet is actually a benevolent ruler and is bringing about a utopian Star Trek future but gets blown up at its inception by time travelling angry mayonnaise ghoul luddites that are just mad their jerbs are being automated away - wait, that's actually a exceptional idea of his.

Not sure which of his ideas are more retarded; this or the Care Bears/Paradise Lost crossover.

 

[TowinKarz]

If it's for the reasons Bob wants it to, then no it shouldn't. He can prattle on about how "historically significant" BP is, but he only loves the film because he sees it as a validation of his political beliefs.

As does every other virtue-signalling blogger lining up to sing and dance for it's approval, they might as well have called it "Woke: The Movie"

 

[LastOfTheMohicans]

Okay, I'll be that asshole.

Since when is Scorpion a good guy?

Since Mortal Kombat 4.

His status as a zombie demon ghost gets retconned as being a slave of Quan Chi. He is "freed" somehow in a few of the many contradictory endings of MK4 -- he finds out Quan Chi killed his family and ninja clan and not Sub Zero. He then decides to hunt down Quan Chi for revenge instead of Sub Zero, which technically makes him a good guy, in some sense of the word.

Then in Deception he gets stated as being the designated "Champion of the Elder Gods". Basically that he's the guy who's supposed to actually beat the big fuckoff bad guy dragon. Basically yes, by this point Midway tacitly admits that Scorpion is secretly now the main character, because they kill off Liu Kang in Deadly Alliance.

In 9 the timeline resets and he's back to being a slave of Quan Chi, but has misgivings when Raiden says, "You know...maybe being a zombie demon ghost slave of that pale guy isn't a great idea..."

During 10 they defeat Quan Chi and actually give Scorpion his humanity back instead of having him stay a zombie demon. There's a whole scene of him saying "My name is Hanzo Hasashi" even rejecting the idea of being Scorpion.

In retrospect, I feel like this is more indicative of Mortal Kombat's shitty writing than anything else, but Bob was more or less correct in that according to modern Mortal Kombat, Scorpion is a protagonist.

 

[Brother Wind]

Okay, I'll be that asshole.



Since Mortal Kombat 4.

His status as a zombie demon ghost gets retconned as being a slave of Quan Chi. He is "freed" somehow in a few of the many contradictory endings of MK4 -- he finds out Quan Chi killed his family and ninja clan and not Sub Zero. He then decides to hunt down Quan Chi for revenge instead of Sub Zero, which technically makes him a good guy, in some sense of the word.

Then in Deception he gets stated as being the designated "Champion of the Elder Gods". Basically that he's the guy who's supposed to actually beat the big fuckoff bad guy dragon. Basically yes, by this point Midway tacitly admits that Scorpion is secretly now the main character, because they kill off Liu Kang in Deadly Alliance.

In 9 the timeline resets and he's back to being a slave of Quan Chi, but has misgivings when Raiden says, "You know...maybe being a zombie demon ghost slave of that pale guy isn't a great idea..."

During 10 they defeat Quan Chi and actually give Scorpion his humanity back instead of having him stay a zombie demon. There's a whole scene of him saying "My name is Hanzo Hasashi" even rejecting the idea of being Scorpion.

In retrospect, I feel like this is more indicative of Mortal Kombat's shitty writing than anything else, but Bob was more or less correct in that according to modern Mortal Kombat, Scorpion is a protagonist.

Oh. Well thank you, I didn't play past Trilogy really. I played MK9 but fuck if I remember that part?

 

[Judge Dredd]

Terminator: The Superior Future War - Skynet is actually a benevolent ruler and is bringing about a utopian Star Trek future but gets blown up at its inception by time travelling angry mayonnaise ghoul luddites that are just mad their jerbs are being automated away - wait, that's actually a exceptional idea of his.

His idea for a remake of Escape from New York is just as bad. Snake has to escape middle america full of MAGA hat wearing buck tooth yokels because coastal city urban decay no longer exists. I guess all those stories of scores of people shooting up in subway stations and shitting in the streets are fake news.

 

[LiquidKid]

His idea for a remake of Escape from New York is just as bad. Snake has to escape middle america full of MAGA hat wearing buck tooth yokels because coastal city urban decay no longer exists. I guess all those stories of scores of people shooting up in subway stations and shitting in the streets are fake news.

Dude, Escape from Antifa would be an amazing movie. Like Escape from LA, but actually good

 

[RodgerDodger]

Kamala Harris seems shady to me.

She literally fucked and blew her way into power like a pink haired “Indy” game developer.