2019-04-10 DSP Got Married - Replacing the Gorilla Munch mascot put us on the bad timeline.

[Flabba Wabba Jabba]

Phil is the equivalent of the friend that begs you for money to buy ramen to last him for the week until his check clears. Goes out to hit on girls and blow it all on a cigs and cheap beer then complains how hungry he is in a late night random text.

Yeah that's why he's going to CT; to suck his parents toes, kiss and wash their feet for saving his pathetic ass

Fan fiction time: what if DSP knows he's going to lose his house and he's trying to tie kat down so she can't leave him when it happens?

I don't think a man of his calibre even possesses the most basic intelligence to realise that editing your clips to concise, informative and interesting videos garners more attention then just mass uploads, so no.

 

[Prince Lotor]

I don't care where, when, or how Philbert got married. Don't much care he even is married since nothing changes in regards to his behavior or expectations of the lil woman, but if he keeps calling her Mrs. Burnell I might choke on my own vomit.

Oh JFC 'Mrs. Burnell' Sounds like he's referring to his mother, and given the dynamic of their relationship that's not too far off the mark.

 

[LiquidCancer]

 

[KingofSuffering]

Just FYI if you guys were wondering where he stayed on the trip it was most likely this place: 62 Rowe Ave, Milford, CT 06460

Its a Residence Inn next to a Red Roof Inn, $150 a night.

 

[DukeMorty]

Just FYI if you guys were wondering where he stayed on the trip it was most likely this place: 62 Rowe Ave, Milford, CT 06460

Its a Residence Inn next to a Red Roof Inn, $150 a night.

So he stayed at a moderately priced place. If he stayed in the Four Seasons or some elite hotel then I would say that would be fucked up on his part because that means he made his parents spend a shit ton so he can watch movies on his wedding night. Instead, he made his parents pay for a moderate priced hotel to just watch movies. Which is still sad because if I had my new wife alone in any priced room I would do some nonstop hanky panky, definitely wouldn't watch movies. Speaking of which this makes me believe that Phil's aging issue he discovered that happens to men his age is most likely ED, like seriously on your wedding night you watched movies lol

 

[KingofSuffering]

So he stayed at a moderately priced place. If he stayed in the Four Seasons or some elite hotel then I would say that would be fucked up on his part because that means he made his parents spend a shit ton so he can watch movies on his wedding night. Instead, he made his parents pay for a moderate priced hotel to just watch movies. Which is still sad because if I had my new wife alone in any priced room I would do some nonstop hanky panky, definitely wouldn't watch movies. Speaking of which this makes me believe that Phil's aging issue he discovered that happens to men his age is most likely ED, like seriously on your wedding night you watched movies lol

I can't imagine anyone being attracted to DSP either physically or emotionally, but hey he must have something going on for Kat to marry him.

 

[KangarooPissSpray]

So he stayed at a moderately priced place. If he stayed in the Four Seasons or some elite hotel then I would say that would be fucked up on his part because that means he made his parents spend a shit ton so he can watch movies on his wedding night. Instead, he made his parents pay for a moderate priced hotel to just watch movies. Which is still sad because if I had my new wife alone in any priced room I would do some nonstop hanky panky, definitely wouldn't watch movies. Speaking of which this makes me believe that Phil's aging issue he discovered that happens to men his age is most likely ED, like seriously on your wedding night you watched movies lol

I think it’s not so much Dave wanting to take it easy and stay in a moderate place but a lack of options, if there was a $300 a night joint in Bridgeport and his parents would have been dumb enough to pay for it you can bet your mentally ill ass he would have picked that.

 

[bearsintrees]

I can't imagine anyone being attracted to DSP either physically or emotionally, but hey he must have something going on for Kat to marry him.

A roof (possibly moldy) and low expectations.

 

[Mask_de_SMITH]

I think this whole marriage thing is just a way to keep Kat so she doesn't run off with anyone else.

Little does Phil know, however, that marriage is a commitment. And DSP is never committed to anything in his life.

 

[Dumpster dived waifu]

And DSP is never committed to anything in his life.

that is blantantly false. how dare you spread such vile libel. dsp is super committed to not getting a job

 

[DoubleBored]

I think this whole marriage thing is just a way to keep Kat so she doesn't run off with anyone else.

Little does Phil know, however, that marriage is a commitment. And DSP is never committed to anything in his life.

I bet he only married to appease his parents so he could get the bail money.

 

[Flabba Wabba Jabba]

that is blantantly false. how dare you spread such vile libel. dsp is super committed to not getting a job

Unironically this. I read it in a YouTube comment under one of The Outsyder's videos and I'll quote it again, "I've never seen a man bust his ass so hard to stay lazy." Which perfectly fucking summarises DSP.

 

[KingjadVCMP]

Not the largest data pool but only 1 in 5 believe it'll NOT end in divorce.

 

[PieceofShet]

Not the largest data pool but only 1 in 5 believe it'll NOT end in divorce.

View attachment 731264

OFC it will not take long. They dont love each other. Just check the hostage video.

 

[Meerkat Ink]

OFC it will not take long. They dont love each other. Just check the hostage video.

"I like being with...Phil"

For real though, they have no chemistry whatsoever as a couple, let alone a married one. Given Phil is an egomaniac he probably doesn't care much about Khet's opinion on whatever, doesn't have much time to spend with her (because he is working his ass off playing games) and has the social capabilities of a hermit.

This is all speculations, of course, since we don't really know what's going on behind the scenes, but knowing Phil's antics Khet will wind up cheating on him for someone who doesn't have the physique of a geriatric and won't make her feel like she's living in a retirement home. Our boy Phil might know about that, but this will most probably be the last piece of coochie he'll ever see, so he might look away and get cucked hard by Tyrone or Chad. Or maybe both.

Khet's backstory highlights her betrayal of Subaru Man, so why not do it again. This time at least she can pick up some loot when she's moving out. She's Ms. Burnell after all.

 

[Dr.Research]

Meanwhile on TKOH, Kghaleon notices Phil got hitched:
View attachment 721962

This might be petty but her nails remind me of someone who has a gold tooth smack in the front of their mouth.

 

[Freshtodeath]

The marriage won't last. They have no work/life balance and uneasy finances. Dsp is at peak of his income. Even if they inherit like 300k that won't last if they have kids or something. Just being realistic here. When streaming ends? Dsp wont be able to pay the bills. He has no idea how tough the job market is. I bet it is really tough in seattle too.

 

[Chan the Wizard]

It’d be hilarious if Khet is in it for the inheritance money or some other con.
I’m certain it’s because of the roof over her head now, but I bet she’s thought about all the times Phil’s talked about his dying parents and how she could get half of it by divorcing him in a year or two once they croak.

 

[Professor Iris]

Not for nothing, but this is the type of couple you'd see getting married in front of a trailer with a pile of Twinkies slapped together as a wedding cake.

 

[Prince Lotor]

Not for nothing, but this is the type of couple you'd see getting married in front of a trailer with a pile of Twinkies slapped together as a wedding cake.

That would've been a step up from the wedding they actually had tbh