The (New) Twilight Zone - Surprise: Its shit

[WaltherPPGAY]

Heavy handed garbage should be the subtitle for this show.

The funniest part is the fucking first episode, the comedian, starts with Tracy Morgan playing some fictional highly successful comedian telling the dude his jokes keep flopping because people don't care what you think. Nobody gives a shit what some comedian thinks of the second amendment.

Somehow they wrote that episode including that line along with the story kind of supporting it, then fucking completely forgot the lesson while writing the rest of the series.

So far the best episode has been pretty meh, and the bad ones are fucking so bad...

You're forgetting that Tracy Morgan is playing the bad guy, so his advice is evil.

The actual message is that people telling you to be something other than a woke propaganda machine are trying to destroy you.

 

[The Pink Panther]

You're forgetting that Tracy Morgan is playing the bad guy, so his advice is evil.

They made the black guy the villain? That's not woke at all!

 

[FuckedUp]

Alright, so I watched the 11 year old president one. It was obviously a jab at trump, but executed so clumsily it made the creators look stupid.

So Harold from Harold and Kumar is a dude who gets people elected and shit. He first tries to get some unlikable old dude elected or re-elected or something, and it looks like it's gonna work... then he fails. OH NO. So he's sad about it.

But then there's this 11 year old kid on the youtubes making videos people really like saying generic stupid stuff, like "There shouldn't be wars" and "everyone should get free stuff".

They say technically it'll be the kid's mom running, so it's all totes constitutional and not the stupidest thing you ever heard.

So harold teams up with the kid and the parents go along with this for some reason. The kid gets horribly embarrassed at a debate and literally cries for his mommy. But then, he makes a video about his dying dog and everyone loves him again! So obviously he gets elected president. Somehow everyone's in on the detail that his mom will be the one who is technically president.

So then he wants to implement his campaign promises, starting with "Free video games for everyone". His advisors tell him that's not how it works, then he has a temper tantrum and somehow, everyone gets free video games. He also outlaws old doctors. I guess the writers of this show think the president just unilaterally makes laws?

Also he cheats at golf and wants to have dessert before dinner. Then when Harold disagrees with him, he calls it treason then says "He has a gun" and harold gets shot. At the end, a little kid comes to operate on Harold because the president outlawed old doctors.

If you can believe it, although everyone agrees it was a shit episode and not amusing, all the mainstream reviewers thought the Trump comparisons were perfect and spot on because they're fucking idiots. Still they gave it like 1 or 2 star reviews for the most part.

Next up: Not All Men.

Dear fucking god, kill me now...

This would've been pretty dumb back in like 2016 when paranoid liberals were actually fearing he'd bring back slavery and shit, but this came out now, more than halfway through the term without anything like the nuclear war we were promised. This is single most retarded fucking thing I've ever heard.

 

[The Pink Panther]

This would've been pretty dumb back in like 2016 when paranoid liberals were actually fearing he'd bring back slavery and shit, but this came out now, more than halfway through the term without anything like the nuclear war we were promised. This is single most exceptional fucking thing I've ever heard.

Like, do they really think that Trump shoots down people that disagree with him?

 

[From The Uncanny Valley]

Anyone remember that Joe Dante episode of Masters of Horror where dead veterans climbed out of their graves and killed an obvious Ann Coulter stand in? Where the peace candidate for president's signs looked exactly like John Kerry's? And I thought that was heavy handed garbage.

from what I remember it was considered one of the show's worst episodes at the time

 

[PL 001]

Alright, so I watched the 11 year old president one. It was obviously a jab at trump, but executed so clumsily it made the creators look stupid.

So Harold from Harold and Kumar is a dude who gets people elected and shit. He first tries to get some unlikable old dude elected or re-elected or something, and it looks like it's gonna work... then he fails. OH NO. So he's sad about it.

But then there's this 11 year old kid on the youtubes making videos people really like saying generic stupid stuff, like "There shouldn't be wars" and "everyone should get free stuff".

They say technically it'll be the kid's mom running, so it's all totes constitutional and not the stupidest thing you ever heard.

So harold teams up with the kid and the parents go along with this for some reason. The kid gets horribly embarrassed at a debate and literally cries for his mommy. But then, he makes a video about his dying dog and everyone loves him again! So obviously he gets elected president. Somehow everyone's in on the detail that his mom will be the one who is technically president.

So then he wants to implement his campaign promises, starting with "Free video games for everyone". His advisors tell him that's not how it works, then he has a temper tantrum and somehow, everyone gets free video games. He also outlaws old doctors. I guess the writers of this show think the president just unilaterally makes laws?

Also he cheats at golf and wants to have dessert before dinner. Then when Harold disagrees with him, he calls it treason then says "He has a gun" and harold gets shot. At the end, a little kid comes to operate on Harold because the president outlawed old doctors.

If you can believe it, although everyone agrees it was a shit episode and not amusing, all the mainstream reviewers thought the Trump comparisons were perfect and spot on because they're fucking idiots. Still they gave it like 1 or 2 star reviews for the most part.

Next up: Not All Men.

Dear fucking god, kill me now...

Promising everyone free shit without any idea of how economics work? Sounds like a Bernie jab as well.

 

[The Pink Panther]

Promising everyone free shit without any idea of how economics work? Sounds like a Bernie jab as well.

not intended

 

[Dom Cruise]

Anyone remember that Joe Dante episode of Masters of Horror where dead veterans climbed out of their graves and killed an obvious Ann Coulter stand in? Where the peace candidate for president's signs looked exactly like John Kerry's? And I thought that was heavy handed garbage.

Yes, I remember.

That episode, heavy handed though it may have been, was at least a little more understandable given it was over a war, it serves as an interesting time capsule of the era today and honestly, the final shot and line of the episode*, despite being goofy, was also somewhat chilling or at least got your attention as something uniquely weird.

*the one with 3 zombies reenacting the "Spirit of 1776" painting and the protagonist narrating "We will show you the true face of war, the face of Hell."

That sort of thing was more understandable and forgivable during the Bush years given the gravity of the situation with the Iraq war, but it's idiotic under Trump because the guy hasn't actually done anything yet to be worthy of such scorn.

 

[Corbin Dallas Multipass]

Like, do they really think that Trump shoots down people that disagree with him?

They apparently think the president makes laws unilaterally and can charge people with treason at random.

Like I said, that episode really ended up making the writers look like they had no understanding how politics work, which renders their satire completely ineffective. The dems are the ones who tend to go for the nice sounding ideas with no thought put into their actual implementation anyway. Anyone remember "You can keep your doctor!" Yeah, somehow insurance will be mandatory and magically become cheaper! But I digress...

I'll write up my shitty review of the random elements of the episode that I remember after I watch "Not all men". It's gonna be bad, obviously, but I wonder if it will be able to top that fucking awful video camera racism episode.

I wish I would watch shows when they were new, thanks to the people discussing this with me now.

 

[Cool kitties club]

Alright, so I watched the 11 year old president one. It was obviously a jab at trump, but executed so clumsily it made the creators look stupid.

So Harold from Harold and Kumar is a dude who gets people elected and shit. He first tries to get some unlikable old dude elected or re-elected or something, and it looks like it's gonna work... then he fails. OH NO. So he's sad about it.

But then there's this 11 year old kid on the youtubes making videos people really like saying generic stupid stuff, like "There shouldn't be wars" and "everyone should get free stuff".

They say technically it'll be the kid's mom running, so it's all totes constitutional and not the stupidest thing you ever heard.

So harold teams up with the kid and the parents go along with this for some reason. The kid gets horribly embarrassed at a debate and literally cries for his mommy. But then, he makes a video about his dying dog and everyone loves him again! So obviously he gets elected president. Somehow everyone's in on the detail that his mom will be the one who is technically president.

So then he wants to implement his campaign promises, starting with "Free video games for everyone". His advisors tell him that's not how it works, then he has a temper tantrum and somehow, everyone gets free video games. He also outlaws old doctors. I guess the writers of this show think the president just unilaterally makes laws?

Also he cheats at golf and wants to have dessert before dinner. Then when Harold disagrees with him, he calls it treason then says "He has a gun" and harold gets shot. At the end, a little kid comes to operate on Harold because the president outlawed old doctors.

If you can believe it, although everyone agrees it was a shit episode and not amusing, all the mainstream reviewers thought the Trump comparisons were perfect and spot on because they're fucking idiots. Still they gave it like 1 or 2 star reviews for the most part.

Next up: Not All Men.

Dear fucking god, kill me now...

Wow it’s even worse then I thought. I just saw a screenshot and knew it was gonna be ORANGE MAN BAD episode or at the very least an even shittier version of The Waldo Moment but it seems like the writers can’t even do basic satire. Oh and thank you for actually watching the “Not All Men” episode for us I just read one single review and wanted to vomit for its second hand garbage.

 

[Corbin Dallas Multipass]

Holy shit, yeah, this is the obvious audience for this shit:

Despite your individual opinion on the ending of “Not All Men,” or the premise of the episode itself, this Twilight Zone episode is necessary. The Twilight Zone has always been centered on socio-political commentary.

Translation: It's important for people to say the things I agree with regardless of whether it ruins the entertainment product. Sounds like this reviewer should sign up on ResetEra...

EDIT: OK, reading more about this show... this is what it was meant to be. It's all for the replay, not all men, and 11 year old president episode:

Because one of the sentences you hear often like once a week for the past couple of years is it feels like we're living in the fucking Twilight Zone," Peele said. Kinberg agreed. "I think the world, all of a sudden, was in desperate need of The Twilight Zone. If I told you three or four years ago that a reality star would be the president with access to the nuclear codes, you would've been like, 'That is a crazy episode of The Twilight Zone.'"

Though the cast was tight-lipped about the content of their episodes, Ike Barinholtz (The Mindy Project) noted that his entry into the series focuses on something that he sees as a very real threat. "It definitely dealt with the overall theme of toxic masculinity, which I will say we're definitely being strangled with."

The whole fucking show is a lefty temper tantrum. It never had a chance.

 

[FuckedUp]

Minor nitpick: I get that 11-year-olds don't have the best judgement, but the kid president's legitimately borderline rétarded even for his age. It feels like the kid was originally supposed to be 6 years old like in "It's a Good Life" but was changed to 11 at the last minute.

 

[CIA Nigger]

Is this thing dead or something? I've seen no hype, I've seen no praise, I don't even know if it's done or not. It genuinely not only seems shitty but completely irrelevant.

That's because the sci-fi anthology show everyone's watching now is Black Mirror. People compare real life events to that show all the time and whenever a new episode drops there's plenty of hype.

It helps that Black Mirror is a lot more culturally relevant too instead of being written solely for woke clickbait writers like the new Twilight Zone seems to be.

 

[Ruin]

That's because the sci-fi anthology show everyone's watching now is Black Mirror. People compare real life events to that show all the time and whenever a new episode drops there's plenty of hype.

It helps that Black Mirror is a lot more culturally relevant too instead of being written solely for woke clickbait writers like the new Twilight Zone seems to be.

Idk man Black Mirror is pretty woke. Every episode I've seen has had either a dyke or some sort of troon in it.

 

[Corbin Dallas Multipass]

Idk man Black Mirror is pretty woke. Every episode I've seen has had either a dyke or some sort of troon in it.

Black mirror is woke, but it still has something thoughtful to say. Like the episode about being able to vote for someone to die on social media being a scathing critique of cancel culture, and before it was called "cancel culture".

Black mirror seems to have some self awareness, although they do drink the Kool aid to a degree.

The new tz just seems to be written exclusively for the woke hot take articles. Even the people praising it still give it low overall ratings...

 

[Dom Cruise]

Wow it’s even worse then I thought. I just saw a screenshot and knew it was gonna be ORANGE MAN BAD episode or at the very least an even shittier version of The Waldo Moment but it seems like the writers can’t even do basic satire. Oh and thank you for actually watching the “Not All Men” episode for us I just read one single review and wanted to vomit for its second hand garbage.

That episode sounds like a ripoff of the Masters of Horror episode "The Screwfly Solution" where aliens infect all the world's men with a virus that makes them uncontrollably kill women.

But there it really was aliens, here it's just a "placebo" revealing men are deep down murderous misogynists all along? What kind of fucked up world do we live in where that's the message from a TV show?

And on top of that there's this quote from the article itself.

Primarily for women, living in our society requires a constant state of adaptation. To survive in the corporate landscape, women have to feign agreeability with any other male coworkers and supervisors. It’s how we protect ourselves from getting fired or laid off, but that doesn’t protect us from routine sexism in the workplace or having our ideas undermined and stolen.

Dating has become an increasingly dangerous risk in our social lives. Even rejecting a man’s offer for a date puts us or others are at risk of injury or worse. Practically any social setting is dangerous. This isn’t a fictional horror setting. We don’t need to imagine these repercussions of how men impact our daily survival skills because this is our reality.

Oh yeah, that's a great message to send to women: "Hey women, live in fear every moment of your lives!"

And "feign agreeability"? So women think everyone has to kiss their ass and agree with whatever they say and they only "feign" the idea that anyone can do otherwise?

Words can't even describe how much I fucking hate woke culture.

 

[CIA Nigger]

Idk man Black Mirror is pretty woke. Every episode I've seen has had either a dyke or some sort of troon in it.

There's two main differences between Black Mirror and this though, Black Mirror's selling point is "scary technology" and it's not in the shadow of a classic series by being a remake. I've never even seen Black Mirror and yet I know it exists because you can find random comments on dystopian tech news articles comparing them to Black Mirror. It clearly resonates with a bigger demographic than this new Twilight Zone remake which came and went with everyone forgetting it existed.

 

[Corbin Dallas Multipass]

OK, I sat down and watched "Not All Men".

I'll repost this section of an interview with the creator of this episode, to get you in the right mindset:

Though the cast was tight-lipped about the content of their episodes, Ike Barinholtz (The Mindy Project) noted that his entry into the series focuses on something that he sees as a very real threat. "It definitely dealt with the overall theme of toxic masculinity, which I will say we're definitely being strangled with."

So this episode was important to the creation of this remake, that and making fun of Trump with the 11 year old president, and claiming black people are in constant danger of being gunned down by crazy cops.

With that out of the way, let's get to the episode:

So the lady who is the main character starts out working in an office. Her boss is telling her to work with some guy and learn from him. He drops some vaguely sexist shit throughout the conversation, then invites her to dinner.

They go to dinner, then toward the end he gets all creepy and rapey and angry and shit. He briefly gets a hold of himself, and she leaves. Then he starts smashing up his house.

Oh, also, at some point some red meteors from outer space fell out of the sky. They turn stuff red.

So the lady, after her bad date, goes out and hangs out with her friend, other lady, at a bar. I think some of their guy friends come along too? So anyway the people at the bar are kinda crazy, and they're drinking stuff with the meteors in it, for some reason. Shit gets crazy at the bar with people fighting and smashing things and shit, so the ladies decide its time to leave.

I think some dude yells something at them as they leave. Then someone follows them while they drive to other lady's house. OH NO! HE CRAY! But they make it home. But shit, crazy man has followed them all the way home.

But other lady's husband is home. Original lady is like "The mens are cray!" but other lady is all "My husband's cool!". Other lady's husband goes out and beats the crazy stalker man to death, while the ladies watch in horror. Original lady locks him out. Other lady is like "Let in my husband, he's fine". While they argue, the husband walks around to the back door and just walks in.

Then he's like "Beating that dude to death sure was fun! Time for birthday cake!" (I guess it was other lady's birthday?) Oh and he's covered with blood, obviously. So he lights the candles and is holding the knife all scary like, and the scared other lady blows out the candles. Then crazy guy tries to attack original lady for leading a crazy man back to his house or something. So the ladies leave.

Outside all the men are basically rioting. One dude hilariously says "Hell of a night!" before being murdered. Some guy is running around with a ball and chain, first defending his property, then just kinda roaming around smashing people. At some point they find other lady's gay son. Oh yeah, his boyfriend went all crazy after drinking some meteorite beer, even though he didn't want any.

Then other lady's husband shows up, he's got the ball and chain now. He tries to strangle other lady. Gay kid starts to hulk out, but manages to keep it under control. Then other lady gets free from crazy husband man somehow.

At this point, the other lady is like "Fuck this shit, I'm getting some of that meteorite super powers to fight back!". But alas, the meteor magic doesn't work for women. But wait! Gay kid had a chunk of meteor in his pocket the entire time... for some reason. And he didn't turn!?!

Then original lady exposits at us what happened. You see, the meteors didn't do anything. They were a placebo. Men just needed an excuse to act out their insane violent rapey nature. Gay kid was a good male feminist and controlled his evil male urges. The fact that people under the influence of the meteors had red eyes, wacky protruding veins, and demon voices were also apparently just placebo affects. How does she know this? Fucked if I know...

So, in the end, the moral of the story was... men are evil dickheads just waiting for an excuse to murderrape you and your family. But with supreme willpower and homosexuality, some men can control it.

Oh then at the end some dude is like "Hey lady, you should smile, you'll look better" and she's like "Fuck you dickhead I don't smile for the patriarchy" or something like that.


I expected to be deeply offended by this. I really wasn't, it was so poorly done it just made the creators look stupid. It was a half decent b movie style zombie flick with a really fucking stupid message.

My wife, a pretty hardcore feminist, just rolled her eyes at this episode. Her favorite episode was Replay, the racism one, and she thought this one might have been the worst of the season. So it was more than just the SJW stuff, most people seem to agree this was a shitty one.

 

[The Pink Panther]

OK, I sat down and watched "Not All Men".

I'll repost this section of an interview with the creator of this episode, to get you in the right mindset:


So this episode was important to the creation of this remake, that and making fun of Trump with the 11 year old president, and claiming black people are in constant danger of being gunned down by crazy cops.

With that out of the way, let's get to the episode:

So the lady who is the main character starts out working in an office. Her boss is telling her to work with some guy and learn from him. He drops some vaguely sexist shit throughout the conversation, then invites her to dinner.

They go to dinner, then toward the end he gets all creepy and rapey and angry and shit. He briefly gets a hold of himself, and she leaves. Then he starts smashing up his house.

Oh, also, at some point some red meteors from outer space fell out of the sky. They turn stuff red.

So the lady, after her bad date, goes out and hangs out with her friend, other lady, at a bar. I think some of their guy friends come along too? So anyway the people at the bar are kinda crazy, and they're drinking stuff with the meteors in it, for some reason. Shit gets crazy at the bar with people fighting and smashing things and shit, so the ladies decide its time to leave.

I think some dude yells something at them as they leave. Then someone follows them while they drive to other lady's house. OH NO! HE CRAY! But they make it home. But shit, crazy man has followed them all the way home.

But other lady's husband is home. Original lady is like "The mens are cray!" but other lady is all "My husband's cool!". Other lady's husband goes out and beats the crazy stalker man to death, while the ladies watch in horror. Original lady locks him out. Other lady is like "Let in my husband, he's fine". While they argue, the husband walks around to the back door and just walks in.

Then he's like "Beating that dude to death sure was fun! Time for birthday cake!" (I guess it was other lady's birthday?) Oh and he's covered with blood, obviously. So he lights the candles and is holding the knife all scary like, and the scared other lady blows out the candles. Then crazy guy tries to attack original lady for leading a crazy man back to his house or something. So the ladies leave.

Outside all the men are basically rioting. One dude hilariously says "Hell of a night!" before being murdered. Some guy is running around with a ball and chain, first defending his property, then just kinda roaming around smashing people. At some point they find other lady's gay son. Oh yeah, his boyfriend went all crazy after drinking some meteorite beer, even though he didn't want any.

Then other lady's husband shows up, he's got the ball and chain now. He tries to strangle other lady. Gay kid starts to hulk out, but manages to keep it under control. Then other lady gets free from crazy husband man somehow.

At this point, the other lady is like "Fuck this shit, I'm getting some of that meteorite super powers to fight back!". But alas, the meteor magic doesn't work for women. But wait! Gay kid had a chunk of meteor in his pocket the entire time... for some reason. And he didn't turn!‽

Then original lady exposits at us what happened. You see, the meteors didn't do anything. They were a placebo. Men just needed an excuse to act out their insane violent rapey nature. Gay kid was a good male feminist and controlled his evil male urges. The fact that people under the influence of the meteors had red eyes, wacky protruding veins, and demon voices were also apparently just placebo affects. How does she know this? Fucked if I know...

So, in the end, the moral of the story was... men are evil dickheads just waiting for an excuse to murderrape you and your family. But with supreme willpower and homosexuality, some men can control it.

Oh then at the end some dude is like "Hey lady, you should smile, you'll look better" and she's like "Fuck you dickhead I don't smile for the patriarchy" or something like that.


I expected to be deeply offended by this. I really wasn't, it was so poorly done it just made the creators look stupid. It was a half decent b movie style zombie flick with a really fucking stupid message.

My wife, a pretty hardcore feminist, just rolled her eyes at this episode. Her favorite episode was Replay, the racism one, and she thought this one might have been the worst of the season. So it was more than just the SJW stuff, most people seem to agree this was a shitty one.

Pretty good review....hol' up...wait a sec.

My wife, a pretty hardcore feminist, just rolled her eyes at this episode. Her favorite episode was Replay, the racism one, and she thought this one might have been the worst of the season. So it was more than just the SJW stuff, most people seem to agree this was a shitty one.

My wife, a pretty hardcore feminist, just rolled her eyes at this episode

My wife, a pretty hardcore feminist,

Out of all people....I never expected you to have married a modern feminist.

 

[Corbin Dallas Multipass]

Pretty good review....hol' up...wait a sec.







Out of all people....I never expected you to have married a modern feminist.

Hah, actually while I disagree with most SJW stuff I'm pretty onboard with "face value" feminism, whatever that's called these days. Basically, an egalitarian who thinks overall women do have the short end of the stick (But not universally).

My wife's beliefs are unique to her, she's put plenty of thought behind her positions, and obviously we have different perspectives. I am sure I wouldn't have married someone who just regurgitates talking points they read online, but someone who can challenge my own viewpoints and critically think? It's been a huge source of personal growth for me, and if I'm not being too modest, I think for her as well.

Plus, we enjoy being with each other. That doesn't require us to be in complete agreement, usually us voting is a complete waste of time since we just cancel each other out...

We both know we're right, and the other means well.

Bit of a powerlevel there. But hopefully you take some hope from this, if some crazy asshole like me can be happily married, you're probably not hopeless.