The (New) Twilight Zone - Surprise: Its shit

[Larry Anon]

OK, I sat down and watched "Not All Men".

I'll repost this section of an interview with the creator of this episode, to get you in the right mindset:


So this episode was important to the creation of this remake, that and making fun of Trump with the 11 year old president, and claiming black people are in constant danger of being gunned down by crazy cops.

With that out of the way, let's get to the episode:

So the lady who is the main character starts out working in an office. Her boss is telling her to work with some guy and learn from him. He drops some vaguely sexist shit throughout the conversation, then invites her to dinner.

They go to dinner, then toward the end he gets all creepy and rapey and angry and shit. He briefly gets a hold of himself, and she leaves. Then he starts smashing up his house.

Oh, also, at some point some red meteors from outer space fell out of the sky. They turn stuff red.

So the lady, after her bad date, goes out and hangs out with her friend, other lady, at a bar. I think some of their guy friends come along too? So anyway the people at the bar are kinda crazy, and they're drinking stuff with the meteors in it, for some reason. Shit gets crazy at the bar with people fighting and smashing things and shit, so the ladies decide its time to leave.

I think some dude yells something at them as they leave. Then someone follows them while they drive to other lady's house. OH NO! HE CRAY! But they make it home. But shit, crazy man has followed them all the way home.

But other lady's husband is home. Original lady is like "The mens are cray!" but other lady is all "My husband's cool!". Other lady's husband goes out and beats the crazy stalker man to death, while the ladies watch in horror. Original lady locks him out. Other lady is like "Let in my husband, he's fine". While they argue, the husband walks around to the back door and just walks in.

Then he's like "Beating that dude to death sure was fun! Time for birthday cake!" (I guess it was other lady's birthday?) Oh and he's covered with blood, obviously. So he lights the candles and is holding the knife all scary like, and the scared other lady blows out the candles. Then crazy guy tries to attack original lady for leading a crazy man back to his house or something. So the ladies leave.

Outside all the men are basically rioting. One dude hilariously says "Hell of a night!" before being murdered. Some guy is running around with a ball and chain, first defending his property, then just kinda roaming around smashing people. At some point they find other lady's gay son. Oh yeah, his boyfriend went all crazy after drinking some meteorite beer, even though he didn't want any.

Then other lady's husband shows up, he's got the ball and chain now. He tries to strangle other lady. Gay kid starts to hulk out, but manages to keep it under control. Then other lady gets free from crazy husband man somehow.

At this point, the other lady is like "Fuck this shit, I'm getting some of that meteorite super powers to fight back!". But alas, the meteor magic doesn't work for women. But wait! Gay kid had a chunk of meteor in his pocket the entire time... for some reason. And he didn't turn!‽

Then original lady exposits at us what happened. You see, the meteors didn't do anything. They were a placebo. Men just needed an excuse to act out their insane violent rapey nature. Gay kid was a good male feminist and controlled his evil male urges. The fact that people under the influence of the meteors had red eyes, wacky protruding veins, and demon voices were also apparently just placebo affects. How does she know this? Fucked if I know...

So, in the end, the moral of the story was... men are evil dickheads just waiting for an excuse to murderrape you and your family. But with supreme willpower and homosexuality, some men can control it.

Oh then at the end some dude is like "Hey lady, you should smile, you'll look better" and she's like "Fuck you dickhead I don't smile for the patriarchy" or something like that.


I expected to be deeply offended by this. I really wasn't, it was so poorly done it just made the creators look stupid. It was a half decent b movie style zombie flick with a really fucking stupid message.

My wife, a pretty hardcore feminist, just rolled her eyes at this episode. Her favorite episode was Replay, the racism one, and she thought this one might have been the worst of the season. So it was more than just the SJW stuff, most people seem to agree this was a shitty one.

All of the episodes were terrible, but the only one that was truly rage inducing was the season finale, "Blurryman."

The writer of the "new" Twilight Zone is literally being stalked by the ghost of Rod Serling, who reveals himself to her at the end, congratulates her for all of her hard work and tells her that she's ready to take "the next step." Then they step through the Twilight Zone door so that Rod can show her the secrets of the universe.

Rod would have fucking HATED what they did with his show. The people who wrote this shit did the exact opposite of what Rod was trying to do.

 

[Corbin Dallas Multipass]

All of the episodes were terrible, but the only one that was truly rage inducing was the season finale, "Blurryman."

The writer of the "new" Twilight Zone is literally being stalked by the ghost of Rod Serling, who reveals himself to her at the end, congratulates her for all of her hard work and tells her that she's ready to take "the next step." Then they step through the Twilight Zone door so that Rod can show her the secrets of the universe.

Rod would have fucking HATED what they did with his show. The people who wrote this shit did the exact opposite of what Rod was trying to do.

That just sounds lame to me.
Replay was my most hated episode. I literally boo'd it. The 11 year old president one was my second least liked, more due to what they were trying to do than what they actually side. (It was obviously a jab a trump and his childishness, but had such a poor understanding of politics it just didn't work)

The sad thing is, this was made because some celebs with TDS said "it's like we're in the twilight zone, I don't even know anyone who voted for Trump!" It was doomed to fail, if the world actually we're the bubble these people live in it'd be hugely popular.

 

[irishAzoth]

Can we at least agree that the new Twilight zone mars episode was better than the 5th season of Trash Black Mirror

 

[Duncan Hills Coffee]

All of the episodes were terrible, but the only one that was truly rage inducing was the season finale, "Blurryman."

The writer of the "new" Twilight Zone is literally being stalked by the ghost of Rod Serling, who reveals himself to her at the end, congratulates her for all of her hard work and tells her that she's ready to take "the next step." Then they step through the Twilight Zone door so that Rod can show her the secrets of the universe.

Rod would have fucking HATED what they did with his show. The people who wrote this shit did the exact opposite of what Rod was trying to do.

That's actually pretty disgusting, and really fucking narcissistic on the writer's part. Not only does it basically piss on Serling's legacy but it's also the show basically sucking it's own dick saying "Look how awesome our show is!"

 

[PL 001]

All of the episodes were terrible, but the only one that was truly rage inducing was the season finale, "Blurryman."

The writer of the "new" Twilight Zone is literally being stalked by the ghost of Rod Serling, who reveals himself to her at the end, congratulates her for all of her hard work and tells her that she's ready to take "the next step." Then they step through the Twilight Zone door so that Rod can show her the secrets of the universe.

Rod would have fucking HATED what they did with his show. The people who wrote this shit did the exact opposite of what Rod was trying to do.

Fucking hell that honestly ticks me off. SJW faggots ruin absolutely everything they touch. They're so intellectually and creatively bankrupt they have to appropriate the work of others, warp it to their own agenda and then act as though they've achieved something great.

 

[SteelPlatedHeart]

OK, I sat down and watched "Not All Men".

I'll repost this section of an interview with the creator of this episode, to get you in the right mindset:


So this episode was important to the creation of this remake, that and making fun of Trump with the 11 year old president, and claiming black people are in constant danger of being gunned down by crazy cops.

With that out of the way, let's get to the episode:

So the lady who is the main character starts out working in an office. Her boss is telling her to work with some guy and learn from him. He drops some vaguely sexist shit throughout the conversation, then invites her to dinner.

They go to dinner, then toward the end he gets all creepy and rapey and angry and shit. He briefly gets a hold of himself, and she leaves. Then he starts smashing up his house.

Oh, also, at some point some red meteors from outer space fell out of the sky. They turn stuff red.

So the lady, after her bad date, goes out and hangs out with her friend, other lady, at a bar. I think some of their guy friends come along too? So anyway the people at the bar are kinda crazy, and they're drinking stuff with the meteors in it, for some reason. Shit gets crazy at the bar with people fighting and smashing things and shit, so the ladies decide its time to leave.

I think some dude yells something at them as they leave. Then someone follows them while they drive to other lady's house. OH NO! HE CRAY! But they make it home. But shit, crazy man has followed them all the way home.

But other lady's husband is home. Original lady is like "The mens are cray!" but other lady is all "My husband's cool!". Other lady's husband goes out and beats the crazy stalker man to death, while the ladies watch in horror. Original lady locks him out. Other lady is like "Let in my husband, he's fine". While they argue, the husband walks around to the back door and just walks in.

Then he's like "Beating that dude to death sure was fun! Time for birthday cake!" (I guess it was other lady's birthday?) Oh and he's covered with blood, obviously. So he lights the candles and is holding the knife all scary like, and the scared other lady blows out the candles. Then crazy guy tries to attack original lady for leading a crazy man back to his house or something. So the ladies leave.

Outside all the men are basically rioting. One dude hilariously says "Hell of a night!" before being murdered. Some guy is running around with a ball and chain, first defending his property, then just kinda roaming around smashing people. At some point they find other lady's gay son. Oh yeah, his boyfriend went all crazy after drinking some meteorite beer, even though he didn't want any.

Then other lady's husband shows up, he's got the ball and chain now. He tries to strangle other lady. Gay kid starts to hulk out, but manages to keep it under control. Then other lady gets free from crazy husband man somehow.

At this point, the other lady is like "Fuck this shit, I'm getting some of that meteorite super powers to fight back!". But alas, the meteor magic doesn't work for women. But wait! Gay kid had a chunk of meteor in his pocket the entire time... for some reason. And he didn't turn!‽

Then original lady exposits at us what happened. You see, the meteors didn't do anything. They were a placebo. Men just needed an excuse to act out their insane violent rapey nature. Gay kid was a good male feminist and controlled his evil male urges. The fact that people under the influence of the meteors had red eyes, wacky protruding veins, and demon voices were also apparently just placebo affects. How does she know this? Fucked if I know...

So, in the end, the moral of the story was... men are evil dickheads just waiting for an excuse to murderrape you and your family. But with supreme willpower and homosexuality, some men can control it.

Oh then at the end some dude is like "Hey lady, you should smile, you'll look better" and she's like "Fuck you dickhead I don't smile for the patriarchy" or something like that.


I expected to be deeply offended by this. I really wasn't, it was so poorly done it just made the creators look stupid. It was a half decent b movie style zombie flick with a really fucking stupid message.

My wife, a pretty hardcore feminist, just rolled her eyes at this episode. Her favorite episode was Replay, the racism one, and she thought this one might have been the worst of the season. So it was more than just the SJW stuff, most people seem to agree this was a shitty one.

Fucking big what.

 

[frozenrunner]

This honestly sounds like the worst show on television.

Of course, it got a second season while Too Old to Die Young was canceled. I hate Hollywood.

 

[Dom Cruise]

As a big Twilight Zone fan I always dreamed of another revival, but this is what we get.

 

[SteelPlatedHeart]

Good to know I can make myself look like a possessed roid rage monster if I wanted because PLACEBO EFFECT.

EDIT: see, now “able to change yourself physically/mentally by essentially convincing yourself it’s true” would actually make a good episode. Make the twist be something like “guy makes himself the smartest in the world, eventually hates it because there’s no enjoyment from unpredictability or mystery in his life, but can’t change himself back because he’s too smart to trick himself essentially”. Tldr: Dude makes himself a Vulcan and can’t go back.

 

[Dom Cruise]

And yet people say we don't live in a culture that hates men.

 

[Pokemonquistador2]

All of the episodes were terrible, but the only one that was truly rage inducing was the season finale, "Blurryman."

The writer of the "new" Twilight Zone is literally being stalked by the ghost of Rod Serling, who reveals himself to her at the end, congratulates her for all of her hard work and tells her that she's ready to take "the next step." Then they step through the Twilight Zone door so that Rod can show her the secrets of the universe.

Rod would have fucking HATED what they did with his show. The people who wrote this shit did the exact opposite of what Rod was trying to do.

Did the ghost of Rod Serling apoligize for being a homophobe in the 50's and 60's?

"In one of the biographies of Serling, it's reported that Serling used anti-gay epithets to describe at least two actors who were allegedly gay. According to the same source, one of his old paratrooper buddies ended a letter to Serling by signing "Love, (name of old paratrooper buddy)." Serling reportedly wrote back to say how unhealthy he thought that was, and that his old paratrooper buddy should get psychiatric help. I think this all comes from Joel Engel's biography, but I'd need to check."

I found a rumor that Rod had helped make the educational documentary "Boys Beware," but I couldn't confirm it.

(Note: Rod spent some time in the military, which was known for being vehemently anti-gay, so it's no wonder that he picked up on that kind of thing. )

 

[Iceland Heavy]

OK, I sat down and watched "Not All Men".

I'll repost this section of an interview with the creator of this episode, to get you in the right mindset:


So this episode was important to the creation of this remake, that and making fun of Trump with the 11 year old president, and claiming black people are in constant danger of being gunned down by crazy cops.

With that out of the way, let's get to the episode:

So the lady who is the main character starts out working in an office. Her boss is telling her to work with some guy and learn from him. He drops some vaguely sexist shit throughout the conversation, then invites her to dinner.

They go to dinner, then toward the end he gets all creepy and rapey and angry and shit. He briefly gets a hold of himself, and she leaves. Then he starts smashing up his house.

Oh, also, at some point some red meteors from outer space fell out of the sky. They turn stuff red.

So the lady, after her bad date, goes out and hangs out with her friend, other lady, at a bar. I think some of their guy friends come along too? So anyway the people at the bar are kinda crazy, and they're drinking stuff with the meteors in it, for some reason. Shit gets crazy at the bar with people fighting and smashing things and shit, so the ladies decide its time to leave.

I think some dude yells something at them as they leave. Then someone follows them while they drive to other lady's house. OH NO! HE CRAY! But they make it home. But shit, crazy man has followed them all the way home.

But other lady's husband is home. Original lady is like "The mens are cray!" but other lady is all "My husband's cool!". Other lady's husband goes out and beats the crazy stalker man to death, while the ladies watch in horror. Original lady locks him out. Other lady is like "Let in my husband, he's fine". While they argue, the husband walks around to the back door and just walks in.

Then he's like "Beating that dude to death sure was fun! Time for birthday cake!" (I guess it was other lady's birthday?) Oh and he's covered with blood, obviously. So he lights the candles and is holding the knife all scary like, and the scared other lady blows out the candles. Then crazy guy tries to attack original lady for leading a crazy man back to his house or something. So the ladies leave.

Outside all the men are basically rioting. One dude hilariously says "Hell of a night!" before being murdered. Some guy is running around with a ball and chain, first defending his property, then just kinda roaming around smashing people. At some point they find other lady's gay son. Oh yeah, his boyfriend went all crazy after drinking some meteorite beer, even though he didn't want any.

Then other lady's husband shows up, he's got the ball and chain now. He tries to strangle other lady. Gay kid starts to hulk out, but manages to keep it under control. Then other lady gets free from crazy husband man somehow.

At this point, the other lady is like "Fuck this shit, I'm getting some of that meteorite super powers to fight back!". But alas, the meteor magic doesn't work for women. But wait! Gay kid had a chunk of meteor in his pocket the entire time... for some reason. And he didn't turn!‽

Then original lady exposits at us what happened. You see, the meteors didn't do anything. They were a placebo. Men just needed an excuse to act out their insane violent rapey nature. Gay kid was a good male feminist and controlled his evil male urges. The fact that people under the influence of the meteors had red eyes, wacky protruding veins, and demon voices were also apparently just placebo affects. How does she know this? Fucked if I know...

So, in the end, the moral of the story was... men are evil dickheads just waiting for an excuse to murderrape you and your family. But with supreme willpower and homosexuality, some men can control it.

Oh then at the end some dude is like "Hey lady, you should smile, you'll look better" and she's like "Fuck you dickhead I don't smile for the patriarchy" or something like that.


I expected to be deeply offended by this. I really wasn't, it was so poorly done it just made the creators look stupid. It was a half decent b movie style zombie flick with a really fucking stupid message.

My wife, a pretty hardcore feminist, just rolled her eyes at this episode. Her favorite episode was Replay, the racism one, and she thought this one might have been the worst of the season. So it was more than just the SJW stuff, most people seem to agree this was a shitty one.

The real Twilight Zone twist there should be that the meteors are turning men and women crazy but in women it triggers narcissistic delusions and mass paranoia.

 

[Larry Anon]

The real Twilight Zone twist there should be that the meteors are turning men and women crazy but in women it triggers narcissistic delusions and mass paranoia.

If they were being fair, that's the kind of thing they would have done.

 

[FuckedUp]

All of the episodes were terrible, but the only one that was truly rage inducing was the season finale, "Blurryman."

The writer of the "new" Twilight Zone is literally being stalked by the ghost of Rod Serling, who reveals himself to her at the end, congratulates her for all of her hard work and tells her that she's ready to take "the next step." Then they step through the Twilight Zone door so that Rod can show her the secrets of the universe.

Rod would have fucking HATED what they did with his show. The people who wrote this shit did the exact opposite of what Rod was trying to do.

Alright, this now officially the worst show ever made. Who the actual fuck literally makes a fucking episode for the general public that's just putting words in a dead guy's mouth to tell them how great the writer themself is? Is the writer getting their ideas from CWC?

 

[God of Nothing]

All of the episodes were terrible, but the only one that was truly rage inducing was the season finale, "Blurryman."

The writer of the "new" Twilight Zone is literally being stalked by the ghost of Rod Serling, who reveals himself to her at the end, congratulates her for all of her hard work and tells her that she's ready to take "the next step." Then they step through the Twilight Zone door so that Rod can show her the secrets of the universe.

Rod would have fucking HATED what they did with his show. The people who wrote this shit did the exact opposite of what Rod was trying to do.

The series that had Walking Distance, quite possibly one of the most relatable and bittersweet tv episodes I have ever watched, is now host to this monument to vanity. Jordan Peele is a disrespectful hack of the highest proportions. I hope he gets outed as the black Shyamalan soon or people realize it.

 

[PL 001]

The series that had Walking Distance, quite possibly one of the most relatable and bittersweet tv episodes I have ever watched,

Glad to see someone else recognize that wonderful episode. It might be my favorite of the original Zone. Serling's closing narration to it makes me get misty eyed.

 

[drtoboggan]

I also can't take Jordan Peele seriously as Rod Sterling stand in. I always expect him to make a joke or that he's in a skit from Key and Peele like 'Black People Shining'.

Same. I'm expecting an episode with Liam Neesons and Bruce Willy.

 

[Maggots on a Train v2]

Alright, this now officially the worst show ever made. Who the actual fuck literally makes a fucking episode for the general public that's just putting words in a dead guy's mouth to tell them how great the writer themself is? Is the writer getting their ideas from CWC?

They actually published their fanfic of an IRL celebrity, the most shameful genre of fanfic.

 

[Miller]

Who the actual fuck literally makes a fucking episode for the general public that's just putting words in a dead guy's mouth to tell them how great the writer themself is?

It's on par with the other CBS All Access shows.

 

[The Pink Panther]

It's on par with the other CBS All Access shows.

View attachment 866891

CBS All Access shows are the types of shows that are "too ugly for broadcast".