The General Thread

[AnOminous]

I never knew that the Deviant rating icon was a mouth wth.

It's @Cowlick's mouth.

 

[Quantum Diabetes]

Downstairs tard has severely decompensated during lockdown and the police are out here everyday dealing with him. I'm used to smelling fabuloso and skunk weed wafting up but now very musky piss has entered the mix.
It's sort of like popcorn smelling piss which I've gotten when I managed my beetis poorly.

I imagine the end result of his existence here will make the news if he catches Coofaroni. I will have to do one of those "nobody listened to me" interviews about all the people he infected.

With the shit he's been doing I imagine everyone who lives here wants him dead.


My tard safari has been delayed, ssdi people are bitching on Twitter they still don't have Coofbuxx. I did go out for more dip and the usual hobos and bixnoods and all manner of fucktards were doing their usual 7-11 routine. I imagine they'll all be coofin' soon too.

 

[Quantum Diabetes]

Biggest ups to the Tugboat TardSquad around my hood for trying to keep up the semblance of normalcy. A guy I'll call Puerto Rico thousand yard stare guy is out bellowing and making retaŕd noises and two of his buddies had a scuffle that would make Boogie trying to fuck Momokun all oiled up and drunk look graceful.


I think it was over cigarettes but not being in the same species I sometimes try to project logical sentient behavior onto them and overestimate anything they do actually making any fucking sense.

After all this time Puerto Rico tard does not know exactly which apartment is mine and sometimes just yells my name if he thinks he wants my attention. I know it would reveal my position to whip a handful of D batteries at him but the urge is there.
I have a good aim from doing just that as a troubled, unsupervised kid. I would also mix coconut syrup with corn huskers lotion or use a creamy batch of "saw cum" which my Dad used when cutting pipes and dump it somewhere public so it looks like somebody jizzed on their front porch or whatever.

I know I might come off as having anger issues or whatever.

 

[Jonah Hill poster]

I just found out about this Spurnando America Bear meme, and I’m struggling to come into terms how I missed out on this funny meme.

 

[Trilby]

I know I might come off as having anger issues or whatever.

Living with these people certainly doesn't help.

 

[Quantum Diabetes]

Living with these people certainly doesn't help.

So far none of these fucktards are coofing or sweating or anything, really. They're immune to responsibility, why not a deadly disease,

 

[Orion Balls]

There's a helicopter hovering nearby. Either someone is deathly ill, or the police have found another marijuana field.

 

[FuckedUp]

So far none of these fucktards are coofing or sweating or anything, really. They're immune to responsibility, why not a deadly disease,

Even with official data, it still has a <1% death rate for the population as a whole. Basically zero if you're under 60 or so.

And then there's this stuff to consider:

 

[Quantum Diabetes]

Biggest ups to the Tugboat TardSquad around my hood for trying to keep up the semblance of normalcy. A guy I'll call Puerto Rico thousand yard stare guy is out bellowing and making retaŕd noises and two of his buddies had a scuffle that would make Boogie trying to fuck Momokun all oiled up and drunk look graceful.


I think it was over cigarettes but not being in the same species I sometimes try to project logical sentient behavior onto them and overestimate anything they do actually making any fucking sense.

After all this time Puerto Rico tard does not know exactly which apartment is mine and sometimes just yells my name if he thinks he wants my attention. I know it would reveal my position to whip a handful of D batteries at him but the urge is there.
I have a good aim from doing just that as a troubled, unsupervised kid. I would also mix coconut syrup with corn huskers lotion or use a creamy batch of "saw cum" which my Dad used when cutting pipes and dump it somewhere public so it looks like somebody jizzed on their front porch or whatever.

I know I might come off as having anger issues or whatever.

Even with official data, it still has a <1% death rate for the population as a whole. Basically zero if you're under 60 or so.

And then there's this stuff to consider:

Well, if you're a fucktard who only lives for 40 ouncers and weed, telling stories about fights you got in 20 years ago are you even really alive? They're all like Dsp. Flexing on shit that impresses no one, thinking they're hot shit when they're actually cold diarrhea.

 

[Quantum Diabetes]

More fucking idiots are just dumping gallons of heavily perfumed cleaner in their apartments, a couple of times a day a cloud of cleanser fumes so strong that your eyes water drives me to sit in the window and it's still fucking cold here.

It started making the smoke detector chirp.


Can these people please just poison themselves and die already? I can do a "I am legend" being the last survivor in my building.

In fact I'd prefer it if they all fucking died as soon as possible.

 

[Sundae]

On today's episode of "weird but awesome shit in my youtube recommendations":

Bork on, doggos.

 

[Quantum Diabetes]

Man, mods elsewhere are flexing harder and harder over simpler things. Whenever Coofaroni-19 ends I think there'll be a huge backlash against these yeasty twats who got away with being anal with a captive audience.
Pasty nerds will want to play baseball, etc and everyone will go the fuck outside and not give any more Twitch millionaires money.

 

[Return of the Freaker]

So a month ago, I filed for unemployment, but as it was a contract job that expired I figured that would count as termination. Nope. I got a request for more info and none of the possible answers would be correct. All assume either being fired or quitting by your own decision. Since I cannot answer, I'm stuck in limbo and can't recieve benefits.

I have been calling JFS for nearly a month now and while they somehow found time to upgrade their phone menus and change the options around, it is impossible to reach a person. They don't even put you on hold. You get a prerecorded message about high call volume and then it hangs up on you. They don't provide any email contacts. I tried mailing them a fucking letter Monday. Not holding my breath. Can't wait for the lockdown to get extended more so I can burn through my savings and default on all my bills

 

[Crystal Golem]

 

[Quantum Diabetes]

I guess my dipping habit may be making me Coofproof

https://amp.theguardian.com/world/2020/apr/22/french-study-suggests-smokers-at-lower-risk-of-getting-coronavirus?utm_term=Autofeed&CMP=twt_gu&utm_medium=&utm_source=Twitter&__twitter_impression=true

 

[Botched Tit Job]

My car was stolen a week ago and hasn't turned up yet. What dumb mf takes a 10 year old car? It's been a long month, fellow kiwis. Such a long month.

 

[Sundae]

Watching bat rescue vids and listening to fusion jazz is a great way to unwind:

My car was stolen a week ago and hasn't turned up yet. What dumb mf takes a 10 year old car? It's been a long month, fellow kiwis. Such a long month.

I'm just ready for 2020 to be over with already.

 

[Quantum Diabetes]

Downstairs tard's caseworkers have been trying to erase months of his weed and crack smoking by giving him what must be 19 bottles of Dollar Tree lavender Fabuloso. His apartment has a permanent weed smell that will outlast all of us.
Every three hours, he dumps an entire bottle on the floor (I heard him splashing it as I got the mail) and creates a poison gas cloud. I had to suit up and leave for the last one. I'm wondering how long it will be before he kills himself doing this.
I hope it's soon.

 

[Botched Tit Job]

I'm just ready for 2020 to be over with already.

I always tend to be one of the people who doesn't let one event define the mood for a year, but man. I literally signed a lease for a more expensive apartment the day before my car got stolen because I was set up to have the spare cash to do it. I just

 

[AnOminous]

Watching bat rescue vids and listening to fusion jazz is a great way to unwind:

Bat is not for eating. Rescuing is much better.