Careercow Robert Chipman / Bob / Moviebob / "Movieblob" - Middle-Aged Consoomer, CWC with a Thesaurus, Ardent Male Feminist and Superior Futurist, the Twice-Fired, the Mario-Worshipper, publicly dismantled by Hot Dog Girl, now a diabetic

[ConsoleWarVet]

Not to mention: What is this family’s fucking deal with lining their empties up along every available surface? Throw garbage away and you’ll have room to organize and store your packaged food properly, you ditch pigs.

Trophies of their gluttonous conquest. Bob's room probably has moderately sized pizza boxes mounted on spikes outside to warn any would-be intruders.

 

[Johan Schmidt]

Trophies of their gluttonous conquest. Bob's room probably has moderately sized pizza boxes mounted on spikes outside to warn any would-be intruders.

It's fucking vile is what it is. I spilled a half cup of milk on my floor a week ago and after two bleach cleans, a powder clean and hoover I still get paranoid that I can smell milk. Having literal piles of refuse would probably have me splashing petrol and tossing matches onto shit.

 

[Marissa Moira]

So what TLC show will the Chipmans be featured on first? My 600lb Life or Hoarders?

 

[Anonymus Fluhre]

Please tell me thats not a one piece bathing suit.....

It looks like a wrestling onesy, like the type Earthquake wore. Pray to all that is holy he at least hides his "dickfat" and it's not like the Avalanche's onesy.

 

[Flexo]

Bonus content: this is Chris Chipman cirra 2001. He turns 36 this year so this is him at the cusp of adulthood:

Could the jock/chad that Bob hated all along be his own brother?

 

[John Andrews Stan]

Could the jock/chad that Bob hated all along be his own brother?

To be fair, even balding teenage loser Chip was cooler than present-day Bob. It’s not a high bar to clear. And Bob had an overhanging old alcoholic beer gut when he was a minor.

 

[AnimeGirlConnoisseur]

Says the man whose political party has a possible rapist as the nominee.
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I think Blob should think about this statement. There are plenty of snails that can get laid and (and if the French are to be believed) if you get enough of them together and cook them you could feed a family with them.

It might be mean to point out buuuuuuuut we are internet assholes sooooooooo
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That's a nice sized "apple juice" Sara's got there. It's good to stay hydrated when making cookies.

I don't know if this enough evidence to say that there might be a problem here, but if there is I feel bad for that kid.

 

[Flexo]

To be fair, even balding teenage loser Chip was cooler than present-day Bob. It’s not a high bar to clear. And Bob had an overhanging old alcoholic beer gut when he was a minor.

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In that bottom pic you can definitely tell the sister got the looks and brains in the family.

I mean I'm not going to pick on his niece. She's totally innocent and should enjoy her days (until the robot uprising). Heck, even Chris looks like he could party and have fun. You wouldn't want to talk current events with him but tailgating with the guy could be fun.

But man, that wedding vid... Bob is so socially awkward and social media has clearly made it worse. You can clearly see he's not talking to anyone - girl or guy. So yeah, he's straight, and he's never been with a woman.

And I'll tell you this right now Bob, I have seen plenty of red state homes that are just as bad as yours - and plenty that are better. It's no wonder he resorts to politics, that's the only way he can possibly look down on anyone.

Hey, Bob! You reading this? Let me explain it to you: I do NOT care how trashy your house or lifestyle is. Consume junk physically and mentally all you want. That's what this country is all about and I begrudge no man his tastes no matter how crappy. What takes the fucking cake is your sheer smugness. You're a freakin' ghetto snob!

 

[Koby_Fish]

It was more to imply that she needed to get wasted to endure the task of making cookies with her kid, which is on me for whiffing the joke. As for the why, I have no damn idea why anyone would post personal pictures on ANY social media in this day and age. To be fair to them, this is their house and not Bob's. To the best of my knowledge no one else in Bob's family has proudly declared their superiority over wide swathes of the nation, unlike Bob.

It runs in the family.

idk what their excuse is; mass has bottle deposit, if they took in all their empties they could recoup some money, and by the looks of bob's empties, the return deposit might feed him for like, a week.

 

[Adamska]

It’s just so bizarre to me when people 1) live in squalor and 2) aren’t ashamed of it. The Chipmans have zero pride or shame for being the way they are. Meanwhile, Bob thinks he’s a member of the elite.

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Fuck me, they're so boorish and slobby that they'd be mocked by white trash for being stereotypes. Holy shit, no wonder Bobby's so insecure and projects so much for his imagined foes, this fucker is pure slow-witted yokel and he hates himself for it.

 

[Smithfield Ham]

The more I hear Bob rant about his "superior future [he] earned" the more I think he just wants to live in Wall-e. I bet you he even thinks the movie is a tragedy because the humans get off their fat asses and start living normally again at the end.

 

[Oh Long Johnson]

Welp, that's something you don't see in nature very often.

 

[Sir Wesley Tailpipe]

Welp, that's something you don't see in nature very often.

Nature has got NOTHING to do with that.

 

[The Nothingness]

It’s just so bizarre to me when people 1) live in squalor and 2) aren’t ashamed of it. The Chipmans have zero pride or shame for being the way they are. Meanwhile, Bob thinks he’s a member of the elite.

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Would they be considered "white trash" even though they don't appear to be in poverty and are north of the Mason-Dixon line?

 

[John Andrews Stan]

Fuck me, they're so boorish and slobby that they'd be mocked by white trash for being stereotypes. Holy shit, no wonder Bobby's so insecure and projects so much for his imagined foes, this fucker is pure slow-witted yokel and he hates himself for it.

Yep, self-hating mayo ghoul. And in case you wondered if the previous photos were just from times when the housekeeper had the month off, peep this. Pay particular attention to the filthy food prep surfaces and grime-encrusted floors.





I guess “not having access to strong cleaning solutions” is something both brothers struggle with.




Just like this year, spring 2019 saw the Christmas decorations still out at the Chipmans’ house. Is it possible they haven’t put shit away or cleaned since before Christmas 2018?



They let their baby crawl all over this disgusting carpet.

Would they be considered "white trash" even though they don't appear to be in poverty and are north of the Mason-Dixon line?

Yes.

 

[Sir Wesley Tailpipe]

Would they be considered "white trash" even though they don't appear to be in poverty and are north of the Mason-Dixon line?

White trash is more about a general lack of taste than location or economic standing.

In fact, white trash with money can be almost inspirational in their level of tackiness.

 

[John Andrews Stan]

Every branch on this family tree has tested positive for mayo.

 

[Mola Ram]

Every branch on this family tree has tested positive for mayo.

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Looks like a 2020 Klansman rally with even more genetic deformities.

 

[Marissa Moira]

In fact, white trash with money can be almost inspirational in their level of tackiness.

Their lawns always look like the finest of mini-golf courses.

 

[Sir Wesley Tailpipe]

Looks like a 2020 Klansman rally with even more genetic deformities.

And more hate.