Why Phil Is better then you.

[Disheveled Human]

This is a thread on why Phil is most likely better then you, Dorito, Mountain Dew drinking degenerate.

1. House
2. Wife
3. Condo
4. Car
5. Second Car
6. Plays Video Games for a living
7. Has sex regularly

I am sure you are better then that but post why and what you do in contrast to Phil which makes you better.

 

[MemeGrey]

1. Live with my parents so no stupid mortgage
2. Hundreds of anime waifus to choose from
3. my buddy lets me crash on his couch sometimes
4. Stole my grandmas bus pass
5. And her cane
6. Free yugi-oh and magic cards for stacking shelves at my local hobby shop.
7. Strong right bicep/forearm

 

[The Penultimate Warrior]

Phil is successfully bankrupt, how many of you no life losers can add that to your list of accomplishments?

 

[Sparkletor 2.0]

My mom didn't smoke while pregnant.

 

[Gin-san]

Phil: Thousands of dollars in debt
Me: Zero dollars in debt

But I don't have an overpriced house or a horse-faced wife, so I guess I lose.

 

[Raiken]

Am...Am I DSP?

 

[Thumb Butler]

I may not have his money but I don't waste what I have on digital gay wrestlers.

 

[Juan But Not Forgotten]

1. House

And debt for that house, that he probably isn't gonna pay off.

2. Wife

Considering how joyful their wedding was, it's not something good.

3. Condo

And debt for it.

4. Car

That he doesn't use.

5. Second Car

That he doesn't use either.

6. Plays Video Games for a living

That he hates and I probably would too, since modern games suck.

7. Has sex regularly

Even if he has, he resorts to masturbation on his couch when the camera is on the whole time, so he doesn't have enough.

His luck though... Can't say I am unlucky person, but his luck is just supernatural. Also, I am not a meme-machine.

 

[Prince Lotor]

DSP was his high school class's valedictorian. I was not my high school class's valedictorian.

DSP gave this valedictorian speech at his graduation and "people were blown away" and parents told him "Dude! That was like the BEST valedictorian speech we've ever heard!" I did not give a valedictorian speech at my high school graduation.

 

[tomstone]

1. have good health/ work out regularly
2. not bad looking
3. have a real job
4. dont have to worry about detractors when i leave my house
5. not an alcoholic
6. no mobile game addiction
7. dont have to beg every single day until i die
8. not half pig half cockroach
9. probably wont die before 60yo

 

[Wurstbrot]

1. House
2. Wife
3. Condo
4. Car
5. Second Car
6. Plays Video Games for a living
7. Has sex regularly

Every single one of those has at least one big black dark downside. Emotionally I don't want to bother with any of that if I can avoid it, and Phil shows with his degrees in deficiency why he also shouldn't have bothered to begin with. Owning more won't make you more happy, it just means you have more unused space you never needed. Phil is still bored and unhappy.

I'm a regular human person, with a regular job, a regular living and everything is set to my personal needs. I own everything I personally want, no unecessary luxuries, no nagging housewife, no half a million dollars in debt. And I certainly don't have to come up with scams and lies to keep up the illusion of a better living.

 

[Prince Lotor]

I am not afraid of snow. I am easily physically capable of shovelling snow.

 

[TV's Adam West]

I haven't jacked off on stream

 

[Malcolm Tucker]

I've got 1 friend. Infinitely more than Phil.

 

[Sexy Senior Citizen]

Rosie Palms doesn't count as regular sex.

 

[KingCoelacanth]

Phil has entire board, but I bet most people here don't even have their own thread

 

[Big Brown Schlub]

None of the things I own are business-related

 

[Troonos]

I make a living without begging and lying.

 

[Oyster]

I dont care I never heard of him tbh

 

[RussianParasite]

Phil likely knows the difference between "then" and "than."