Why Phil Is better then you.

1. House - Middle unit condo with a HOA filled with boomers who moan about a driveway not being power washed.
2. Wife - Literal derpy aspie with no ambitions except to play skyrim on everything Todd Howard releases it on.
3. Condo - Condo thats in foreclosure.
4. Car - That he never drives anywhere.
5. Second Car - He doesn't have a second car.
6. Plays Video Games for a living - Begs for quarters from literal wheelchairs for a living.
7. Has sex regularly - Citation needed.

The first law of autism gravity dictates that for every *pahsitive* thing Phils got it has an equal and opposite crippling negative connotation that nobody would ever be jealous of Phil for.
 
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Except for #5 and #6, I can literally say I have equal or better than every single point.

  1. My house is bigger than Phil's and is actually a house and not a condo
  2. I have a wife
  3. I have a second property that I rent out that I haven't needed to surrender in a bankruptcy
  4. My car is worth more than Phil's
  5. I have a motorcycle that has likely travelled more miles this year than Phil has since he moved to Seattle
  6. My job actually khantributes to society
  7. Same as Phil, but not with a horse
 
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I may not have the positives that Phil does, but I also don't have any of the negatives, and those negatives are so bad some street folks wouldn't trade their life for his.

I can't even be jealous of his luck, because making lazy money would NOT improve my life. Especially if it had landed in my lap when I myself was 26. I was admittedly not that bright. Not DSP level stupid, but enough that handing me a bunch of money was ill-advised.
 
Phil's job sucks. It doesn't pay well hourly, he never gets any paid days off, any days off that he takes risk damaging his future income stream as well, he isn't good at doing his job, he doesn't like doing his job, and his job requires him to make an ass of himself every fucking day for the entire world.

But he still gets out of bed and goes to work, every motherfucking workday, even when he doesn't want to -- even when going to work feels like the toughest motherfucking thing in the world.

That's some shit I find genuinely inspiring.
 
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Well, people certainly dedicate their lives just to compile their streams to show the highlights.
I am jelly. :stress:
 
>tfw unlike chaDSP you will never have the confidence to jerk off during livestreams twice
 
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