Why Phil Is better then you.

What's really telling about his condition today is that in no way is it an improvement upon what you see in his face reveal video, where he is already losing hair, and already has the gut and man-boobs you see today.

That just isn't normal for anyone who isn't a complete loser. I'm no great success story myself but I'm still not a 100% decomposed version of me from twelve years ago. I have less hair, but also less fat on my body and an awareness of things that matches my age. Why? Because I don't pride myself on being stupid like Phil does.
 
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Well the first step to becoming a lolcow as a person is allowing yourself to believe you're better than them, so I try to never allow myself to believe I'm better than Phil lest I wake up in 10 years and realize I've become him. After all, listing why I'm better than Phil seems like exactly what Phil would do in this situation.

That said something that will always make most of us at least happier than Phil is our comparative lack of entitlement. Doesn't matter how much money Phil makes, doesn't matter what or who he has, he ALWAYS takes it for granted in an almost astonishingly short period of time.
Homey makes over twice the median annual salary in the US in a childless household with a dual income, has a job that allows him to be at home with his horse and son, his parents are still alive and seem to actually care about him, he has an audience that contains at least a few unironic fans for some reason, yet he legitimately believes he's some perpetual victim who, as you can see, is still suffering while there's some little black kid in Angola who spends his days dodging active landmines and running away from warlords who want to abduct him so he can get food for his starving malaria stricken family and that kid's still like "Eh, ya know, life could be worse".

I believe the quote is "A happy man is not he who has much, but rather he who wants little", and lord knows that applies with Phil.
 
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A lot of people (myself included) living in the First World don't know shit about what a hard life really looks like, but that isn't even Phil's problem. Doesn't help, sure, but it's not the problem. The problem is that nothing alters his shitty personality, because he doesn't want it to. Phil who went through some real shit would be just as big of an asshole today as the Phil who didn't. He may not have predicted or wanted his current situation, but he was never going to avert it even if he had seen it coming from a mile away because it would've required changing, and there's nothing he hates more than the thought of not being a cunt anymore.
 
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1. House
He has a middle unit condo. Which is the worst to have.

2. Wife
His wife is literally mentally unwell, a cheater and ugly. Noone wants to marry the town potato.

3. Condo
Empty, waste of money. He only got it to try and get laid - which he didn't.

4. Car
He doesn't drive.

5. Second Car
Wrong.

6. Plays Video Games for a living
He begs for a living. E.g. DrDisrespect, Ninja and Valk play games for a living.

7. Has sex regularly
You are mad to actually think that.


If you work any kind of job and can take care of yourself, you are more successful than DarksydePhil.
Phil is in debt, had to declare bankruptcy (which he had to scam his way through) and his life is over if he ever gets banned from Twitch. He has no job stability, no job security, no friends, no person that loves him and no person that even cares for him.
Mate, I wager we care more about Phil than Katherine does.
 
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The "Having a Job" factor shouldn't count. I get called a wagecuck for having a job, so it's not really something to brag about anymore.
 
Disheveled Human said:
This is a thread on why Phil is most likely better then you, Dorito, Mountain Dew drinking degenerate.

1. House
2. Wife
3. Condo
4. Car
5. Second Car
6. Plays Video Games for a living
7. Has sex regularly

I am sure you are better then that but post why and what you do in contrast to Phil which makes you better.
Click to expand...
Phil is better than me because he probably knows how and when to use "then" or "than" ;)
 
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I'm impressed by his never ending self-important monologues. It surely has some worth as an entertainer to be able to explode on every single occasion, blow up mundane everyday occurences in way more words than necessary, and never get tired to berate people on how they should adapt his flawed contradictory morals. And he doesn't even have to be right, all it needs is a moving mouth. Really impressive for a man with apparently mental depression. Now if he'd learn to talk and play at the same time, that'd be way more impressive.

I'm just a simple man.
If you ask me how my day went, I'd answer "fine" and the conversation ends. Yes I'm very fun at parties, why you ask?
 
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  1. Is so clean, he only needs to shower once or twice a week
  2. Is such a Chad, he can protect his family, his wife Kat the swimsuit model and his son Jasper the cat, with only a hatchet
  3. Has played all the games
  4. Owns a middle unit condo in what is essentially a retirement community
  5. Has the self-esteem to turn on a webcam and shamelessly beg for money
  6. Has so few fucks to give, will make a statement and then contradict himself in the same breath
  7. Has a Twitter with a blue checkmark
  8. Has his own sub-forum on kiwifarms.net
  9. Informs everyone all the time he’s a grown adult and has matured
  10. Wears vests and blows bubbles like a retard boss
  11. Is probably the one of the best all-around gamers in the world
  12. Placed 4th at EVO on a broken port of Street Fighter no one else participated in
  13. Plays WWE Champions at a grandmaster level
  14. Had a bitchin’ credit card collection
  15. Was awarded a bankruptcy
  16. Has uploaded tens of thousands of videos on YouTube
 
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That bitchin' undercut is giving me some real jealous vibes. If only I could have such a fucked up hairline.
 
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