Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[Aaway]

some twitter replies to jack's post with the bacon wrapped brisket

 

[the khat quaffer]

Haha the devil will taunt him with the laughter of Garret as he burns for his gluttony and sinful ways.

You ARE going to burn Jack. You are a hopeless glutton and time for repentance is almost out.

I suppose we can take comfort in the fact that his elevated body fat and grease content will mean he burns just a little brighter than the average hell-bound boomer. He'll finally burn all that fat, courtesy of Stanford!

If I've learned anything binging this fat useless fucks videos, he cooked it.

Here is Jack's destiny:

He's a lurker...
View attachment 2497954

I'm gonna go against the grain here just a little bit, I dunno why though. Cali, since you read this thread: all in all, I guess, good on you for at least doing some kind of lifting. I dunno what your form is like and frankly, I don't care, I'm not a gymsperg so unless you're literally filming Jackass 5 in the gym, any progress is still progress. It's more than a lot of people can say. You've drawn enough bad cards from life thanks to your dad.

Having said that...stop taking pictures of dudes and little boys from behind and commenting on their legs or their form. It's fucking creepy and I'm pretty sure you know it deep down. Why even do this? You're getting the wrong kind of attention from all the wrong people.

Also stop using emotes and hashtags and talking like a terminally braindead nigger. Talk like a man not a 13 year old girl addicted to instagram. "Yeah boy this is how we do it! Look at dem nat-tastic gains! Never stop grinding! Y'all are just jealous of my toned baboon ass" shut the fuck up, we get it, you work out.

/cowtipping

 

[Dondeld Dock]

Why why why the fuck would you stuff a brisket? I mean, different strokes for different folks and all, but just WHY??
View attachment 2499369
Along with appearing undercooked, I can’t decide which physiological horror this resembles most…oozing pus, gangrene, Mucormycosis, or Necrotizing Fasciitis.

I almost choked on my morning coffee upon seeing this putrid mess. Again Jack managed to conjure up some most unappealing meat chunk directly from hell to satisfy his eternal hunger for raw meat.

 

[Adamska]

Might as well reveal why I was skimming through Jack's videos for his shirts. His autism with wearing specific shirts inspired me to do this:

Spoiler: Warning: Big Picture

For those who haven't clicked, I'm basically compiling a gallery of Jack's shirts since he reminds me of Chris a bit with his obsession with dressing like a ten year old. I've only gone through the last year and I've only done his Cooking With Jack stuff, so expect there to be at least a part 2.

 

[BigDyno392]

In this throwback JOTG video, he flies to Chicago for pizza - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YukvBuqVkdQ

In this food related video, he elegantly gives a tour of the airplane bathroom and toilet. Very classy.

 

[Aaway]

In this throwback JOTG video, he flies to Chicago for pizza - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YukvBuqVkdQ

In this food related video, he elegantly gives a tour of the airplane bathroom and toilet. Very classy.

here's a video of jack and what looks to be one of his church buddies hanging out with a couple black guys at lou malnati's in chicago. nowadays, fatty is scared of even stepping foot in downtown nashville. i wonder what happened that led to jack becoming so terrified of minorities

 

[FatJacksFatAssTongue]

This whole video was him acting like a 12 year old out of town for the first time. Lmao these losers order the sloppiest type of pizza and don’t have forks, knives or even plates to eat with. And both of them are too dumb to hit room service up for some. What a mess

 

[odumegwu]

Why why why the fuck would you stuff a brisket? I mean, different strokes for different folks and all, but just WHY??
View attachment 2499369
Along with appearing undercooked, I can’t decide which physiological horror this resembles most…oozing pus, gangrene, Mucormycosis, or Necrotizing Fasciitis.

I feel sick just from looking at this. If, if that thing would be properly cooked, I would manage to eat 1/10 of that? It's like humongous cake from nightmares, there's no way to eat more. That green thing, is that broccoli? Why is he using it so often? I'm under impression it's his "veggie to go", he's using it or cauliflower to pass off his recipe as healthy. But when camera goes off, green thingy straight to the bin, he doesn't care to actually cook it properly. Wasn't cauliflower in his last recipe raw? And anyway, why broccoli, of all the things?

 

[the khat quaffer]

Might as well reveal why I was skimming through Jack's videos for his shirts. His autism with wearing specific shirts inspired me to do this:

Spoiler: Warning: Big Picture

View attachment 2500664

For those who haven't clicked, I'm basically compiling a gallery of Jack's shirts since he reminds me of Chris a bit with his obsession with dressing like a ten year old. I've only gone through the last year and I've only done his Cooking With Jack stuff, so expect there to be at least a part 2.

Make sure you leave a space for the inevitable surgery gown. Call it "third time's the charm".

 

[Adamska]

Thank you insomnia, since here's part two of my runthrough on Jack's wardrobe.

Let's start with some errata:

Now let's continue:

Spoiler: Jack's Wardrobe Part 2 (spoilered due to image size)

So fun fact; he actually dropped wearing his Getchu Apron sometime in pre-2020, around late 2019 or so. That fucking apron is a big cockblocker for this, since there's at least two or three shirts I wanted to give details on. For example, I still don't know what exactly the full Cross Catastrophe shirt looks like.

 

[rubytintedchix]

I feel sick just from looking at this. If, if that thing would be properly cooked, I would manage to eat 1/10 of that? It's like humongous cake from nightmares, there's no way to eat more. That green thing, is that broccoli? Why is he using it so often? I'm under impression it's his "veggie to go", he's using it or cauliflower to pass off his recipe as healthy. But when camera goes off, green thingy straight to the bin, he doesn't care to actually cook it properly. Wasn't cauliflower in his last recipe raw? And anyway, why broccoli, of all the things?

If you read a few pages back, @Aaway already answered that question: jalapeños, bell peppers, onions and garlic. Nasty.

Thank you insomnia, since here's part two of my runthrough on Jack's wardrobe.

Let's start with some errata:
View attachment 2500978

Now let's continue:

Spoiler: Jack's Wardrobe Part 2 (spoilered due to image size)

View attachment 2500979

So fun fact; he actually dropped wearing his Getchu Apron sometime in pre-2020, around late 2019 or so. That fucking apron is a big cockblocker for this, since there's at least two or three shirts I wanted to give details on. For example, I still don't know what exactly the full Cross Catastrophe shirt looks like.

Nice work with this. I’m going to have to check it out on a non-mobile device for the full detail.

Edit: I think the Diabetic Knight is my favorite so far.

 

[desudesu]

Seems like the thin skinned fatty went on a mass blocking rampage on his Twitter - my burner account lasted almost a year before getting banhammered today after hearting several comments on his godawful brisket post. Interestingly he didn’t delete the comments.

 

[Laughingjoke2]

here's a video of jack and what looks to be one of his church buddies hanging out with a couple black guys at lou malnati's in chicago. nowadays, fatty is scared of even stepping foot in downtown nashville. i wonder what happened that led to jack becoming so terrified of minorities

Big T brought one home?

 

[GoodFattyDeadFatty]

I wonder if this was one of his friends who caught the coof

 

[buttvomit]

I feel sick just from looking at this. If, if that thing would be properly cooked, I would manage to eat 1/10 of that? It's like humongous cake from nightmares, there's no way to eat more. That green thing, is that broccoli? Why is he using it so often? I'm under impression it's his "veggie to go", he's using it or cauliflower to pass off his recipe as healthy. But when camera goes off, green thingy straight to the bin, he doesn't care to actually cook it properly. Wasn't cauliflower in his last recipe raw? And anyway, why broccoli, of all the things?

is this an actualy Jack creation? This is the closest i could find:

This Tasty Smoked Bacon Brisket Is Filled And Topped With Bacon

Beef brisket and bacon smoked together. This smoked bacon brisket recipe tells you how it's done. Very tasty.

www.smoker-cooking.com

They do the weave and stuff the brisket but is with more bacon and an onion not the shit he put in his. Also doesnt jack and Tammy hate spicy food? Why would they ruin it with jalapenos if they dont like them? IDGI

 

[DoorPost101]

View attachment 2500763
This whole video was him acting like a 12 year old out of town for the first time. Lmao these losers order the sloppiest type of pizza and don’t have forks, knives or even plates to eat with. And both of them are too dumb to hit room service up for some. What a mess

I will never get over how outstretched his tounge gets when he eats. You would think it would actually hinder the movement of biting and swallowing.

 

[Warm Busch Forty]

Oh god it’s even worse looking up close.

View attachment 2499520

It reminds me of a video where a butcher hits a pus filled cyst in a leg of pork. Absolutely horrifying.

 

[stets]

View attachment 2501210

I wonder if this was one of his friends who caught the coof

The guy looks like a walking comorbidity, so probably.

Edit: I checked out his Facebook and he's one of Jack's murder church acquaintances.

I also checked out the woman's page jack screenshotted. No mention of Covid, but she did mention that at one point his oxygen saturation dropped to 50% and he had pneumonia. Almost definitely Covid.

Edit again: she mentions explicitly that it was Covid. The dude was on a ventilator for almost two weeks. He'd been in the ICU for almost three.

 

[p1138]

View attachment 2500763
This whole video was him acting like a 12 year old out of town for the first time. Lmao these losers order the sloppiest type of pizza and don’t have forks, knives or even plates to eat with. And both of them are too dumb to hit room service up for some. What a mess

His fatass also complains about having to wait an hour for it to show up. Gee, maybe the giant thick ass deep dish pizza needs time to properly bake? Of course if the lardass actually knew anything about cooking he would have been aware of that.

Then he's sitting there picking at hot cheese with his hands eating it off of a folded up section of newsprint like he's some kind of fucking gorilla and then complaining about the cheese being hot as he burns his sausage fingers while shoveling wads of cheese and sauce into his mouth. The fact that he and another grown adult are too retarded to just get some plates and plasticware from roomservice is just the icing on the idiocy because that would have meant waiting even longer until he could start shoveling food into his face.

Also, what the fuck is with the tongue thing? I assumed it was a habit he developed after his strokes and he was trying not to drop shit. But this is from 2009? Why was this walking defect ever popular enough to get a million views on videos or even a half million subs?

 

[Jack of the Lantern]

Can strokes cause paranoia?

ETA: Bradley was definitely one of Jack's three ventilator friends.