- Joined
- Jan 4, 2018
I will be frank; if you got to this boss, you knew what you were getting into.
Biggest bullshit in a video game
- Thread starter Ughubughughughughughghlug
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MrJokerRager
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Nov 2, 2019
Not being able to have your created characters in Soul Calibur 6 have sex with the females.
- Joined
- Jun 27, 2014
All right, pull up a chair because this is gonna be a long one. Let this oldfag tell you the tale of Armored Core: Last Raven and the horror that is Zinaida.
Last Raven is hard. Brutally, unforgivingly hard. It also has five endings, plus one really shitty one. If you're reasonably used to Nexus, which is very difficult, and you're pulling into LR directly from it, then this game is about to fuck you harder than a prostitute on her first night on the job, and the game won't be wearing a condom. LR routinely throws you into missions where you have to kill multiple ACs, or do objective missions, then an AC, or ACs, a mission, and then a boss. You need nerves of steel, some fantastic AC building skills, and maybe some customized controls to be able to eke out wins.
Most of the game's paths aren't too troublesome, barring a few cases of "that one mission" syndrome throughout. Getting the true end in LR, however, requires you face a boss of such unmitigated bullshit that I can write a thesis statement about it. So here goes. Zinaida herself you can face a few different ways throughout the story. Her main loadout is aggressive and tends to be just this constant pain in your ass from the second the fight starts, but it's fragile and you can tear it down with a few different builds.
The boss version, however, is absolute, 100%, factory-shipped, GMO-free, premium, weapons-grade bullshit. The mission she shows up in, Destroy the Internecine, involves you navigating a tunnel that fills with high-speed suicide weapons, followed with a room where you are surrounded by pulse rifle turrets and have to destroy power conduits. With a lot of skill and/or luck, it's possible to exploit the terrain to avoid the suicide weapons and if you stay moving with any remotely fast AC you'll avoid fire from the turrets entirely once you destroy one of the conduits.
Zinaida then shows up, and you're in for an unforgivable level of cheese. For one, she's got a new weapon that is extremely hard to avoid - a handheld railgun - and her already-fast design has been made even faster. She has, for all intents and purposes, unlimited energy, which means she cannot run out even if you were to somehow ride her ass and nail her with a full pod of generator jammer rockets, so she'll just keep zipping around like she's been doing meth. During this time, she will assail you endlessly with her arm weapons. When these run dry, she will switch to her pulse cannon and small missile launcher (which has missile extensions, so she fires like 8 small missiles per volley) and pepper you with those, before ditching one of her hand weapons to draw a handgun from reserve for additional damage. She's also faster than any player could possibly be and in a room where her mobility is a constant problem.
Oh, you think we're done? Like hell we're done.
She basically can't overheat. Which means that you can't just overheat her and bleed her HP with residual damage. Her heat decreases too fast. If you do somehow force her to overheat (as I was able to do with one build), the sheer level of tuning her suit has means it lasts under a second. For tuning, players get 10 points to apply to each part that qualifies, and they can boost a suit's parameters, increasing its accuracy, response speed, cutting its weight, etc. Zinaida's parts are basically maxed in every stat, so she has about 80-100 points per part whereas the player has 10. She has OP-INTENSIFY upgrades in the game where those stopped being available for players, so she can freely fire back weapons on the move and flat-out has a ton of abilities the player cannot possibly match. She's also notably overweight with no penalties.
An average player fighting her with a normal build will be dead in about fifteen seconds, give or take, and likely will not hit her a single fucking time. She has exactly one weakness, and one weakness only: She will eventually completely run out of ammo and be basically helpless. However, even if she runs out of ammo, you still need to actually kill her ass.
Also of note is that in the PSP version, she is even worse and never lands her machine.
So the obvious question at this point becomes "All right, Jaimas, how do you beat this fucking thing?" Well, that was the goal of a nearly two-month long project by me and my friend Dave in the summer of 2006. No build we used would work. She was too fast. Armor builds, except for one developed by my friend Bryan, also did not work, and the armor build he developed wasn't capable of killing her. Finally, in an effort to figure out ways to take her down, we decided to cheat and run some experiments using a Gameshark.
The first thing we learned is that even if you have Infinite AP (Health), she can still kick your ass. How, you ask? AC:LR is in the Nexus series, which in turn means it uses AC3's engine, so she can break your fucking parts. If you're using weapon arms, there goes your fucking weapons right there. Even if you use regular arms with handheld weapons, her destroying your arms means you have a massive accuracy debuff - while facing the single most cagey and evasive opponent in the entirety of this series.
What we then learned is that there is basically one way the devs intended for you to fight her, which is to go with the lightest possible build, take to the air, lure her up to the ceiling, and then basically knife-fight her to death with machine guns. This is bullshit. Not only because of how rare such a build "naturally" shows up with that config in this game series, but because it blatantly favors alternate control schemes. Many AC veterans came here from the glory days of the old pre-analog-stick AC games with the old control scheme. These players were basically being told to fuck off and that they were doing it wrong. Where most saw a simple declaration of how things should be done, however, me and my associates saw a challenge, and after about two weeks, the three of us, together, each managed to eke out a win against her, fairly, using a method other than what the devs intended. How I did it was stupid and basically luck.
I created Count Nukula.
Count Nukula is a build that focuses on Large Missile Arms, and is mostly a meme build, there to warn PVPers about being complacent. The large missile arms can potentially lock and fire four of the things, which is tantamount to instant death if they all hit, because the player hit will suffer massive damage and almost immediately redzone heat. All four on a light AC is basically a one-shot. All four on a Medium will at best leave it with critical health. On a heavy it will cut its HP in half or more. The mission was painfully simple: Load up the lightest possible AC that could mount these fucking things. Load up the fastest possible FCS. Use back weapons to handle the turrets. When fighting Zinaida, engage secondary fire mode, boost around while keeping her in my sights, then fire the missiles from point-blank range. It took about six tries, but on the final one, I nailed her dead-on and took her out with a single volley.
The way I fought her was the equivalent of rolling double sixes to end a night, but fuck it, dignity is for other pilots.
I still have the save (with all her drops) on a PS2 memory card someplace.
Last Raven is hard. Brutally, unforgivingly hard. It also has five endings, plus one really shitty one. If you're reasonably used to Nexus, which is very difficult, and you're pulling into LR directly from it, then this game is about to fuck you harder than a prostitute on her first night on the job, and the game won't be wearing a condom. LR routinely throws you into missions where you have to kill multiple ACs, or do objective missions, then an AC, or ACs, a mission, and then a boss. You need nerves of steel, some fantastic AC building skills, and maybe some customized controls to be able to eke out wins.
Most of the game's paths aren't too troublesome, barring a few cases of "that one mission" syndrome throughout. Getting the true end in LR, however, requires you face a boss of such unmitigated bullshit that I can write a thesis statement about it. So here goes. Zinaida herself you can face a few different ways throughout the story. Her main loadout is aggressive and tends to be just this constant pain in your ass from the second the fight starts, but it's fragile and you can tear it down with a few different builds.
The boss version, however, is absolute, 100%, factory-shipped, GMO-free, premium, weapons-grade bullshit. The mission she shows up in, Destroy the Internecine, involves you navigating a tunnel that fills with high-speed suicide weapons, followed with a room where you are surrounded by pulse rifle turrets and have to destroy power conduits. With a lot of skill and/or luck, it's possible to exploit the terrain to avoid the suicide weapons and if you stay moving with any remotely fast AC you'll avoid fire from the turrets entirely once you destroy one of the conduits.
Zinaida then shows up, and you're in for an unforgivable level of cheese. For one, she's got a new weapon that is extremely hard to avoid - a handheld railgun - and her already-fast design has been made even faster. She has, for all intents and purposes, unlimited energy, which means she cannot run out even if you were to somehow ride her ass and nail her with a full pod of generator jammer rockets, so she'll just keep zipping around like she's been doing meth. During this time, she will assail you endlessly with her arm weapons. When these run dry, she will switch to her pulse cannon and small missile launcher (which has missile extensions, so she fires like 8 small missiles per volley) and pepper you with those, before ditching one of her hand weapons to draw a handgun from reserve for additional damage. She's also faster than any player could possibly be and in a room where her mobility is a constant problem.
Oh, you think we're done? Like hell we're done.
She basically can't overheat. Which means that you can't just overheat her and bleed her HP with residual damage. Her heat decreases too fast. If you do somehow force her to overheat (as I was able to do with one build), the sheer level of tuning her suit has means it lasts under a second. For tuning, players get 10 points to apply to each part that qualifies, and they can boost a suit's parameters, increasing its accuracy, response speed, cutting its weight, etc. Zinaida's parts are basically maxed in every stat, so she has about 80-100 points per part whereas the player has 10. She has OP-INTENSIFY upgrades in the game where those stopped being available for players, so she can freely fire back weapons on the move and flat-out has a ton of abilities the player cannot possibly match. She's also notably overweight with no penalties.
An average player fighting her with a normal build will be dead in about fifteen seconds, give or take, and likely will not hit her a single fucking time. She has exactly one weakness, and one weakness only: She will eventually completely run out of ammo and be basically helpless. However, even if she runs out of ammo, you still need to actually kill her ass.
Also of note is that in the PSP version, she is even worse and never lands her machine.
So the obvious question at this point becomes "All right, Jaimas, how do you beat this fucking thing?" Well, that was the goal of a nearly two-month long project by me and my friend Dave in the summer of 2006. No build we used would work. She was too fast. Armor builds, except for one developed by my friend Bryan, also did not work, and the armor build he developed wasn't capable of killing her. Finally, in an effort to figure out ways to take her down, we decided to cheat and run some experiments using a Gameshark.
The first thing we learned is that even if you have Infinite AP (Health), she can still kick your ass. How, you ask? AC:LR is in the Nexus series, which in turn means it uses AC3's engine, so she can break your fucking parts. If you're using weapon arms, there goes your fucking weapons right there. Even if you use regular arms with handheld weapons, her destroying your arms means you have a massive accuracy debuff - while facing the single most cagey and evasive opponent in the entirety of this series.
What we then learned is that there is basically one way the devs intended for you to fight her, which is to go with the lightest possible build, take to the air, lure her up to the ceiling, and then basically knife-fight her to death with machine guns. This is bullshit. Not only because of how rare such a build "naturally" shows up with that config in this game series, but because it blatantly favors alternate control schemes. Many AC veterans came here from the glory days of the old pre-analog-stick AC games with the old control scheme. These players were basically being told to fuck off and that they were doing it wrong. Where most saw a simple declaration of how things should be done, however, me and my associates saw a challenge, and after about two weeks, the three of us, together, each managed to eke out a win against her, fairly, using a method other than what the devs intended. How I did it was stupid and basically luck.
I created Count Nukula.
Count Nukula is a build that focuses on Large Missile Arms, and is mostly a meme build, there to warn PVPers about being complacent. The large missile arms can potentially lock and fire four of the things, which is tantamount to instant death if they all hit, because the player hit will suffer massive damage and almost immediately redzone heat. All four on a light AC is basically a one-shot. All four on a Medium will at best leave it with critical health. On a heavy it will cut its HP in half or more. The mission was painfully simple: Load up the lightest possible AC that could mount these fucking things. Load up the fastest possible FCS. Use back weapons to handle the turrets. When fighting Zinaida, engage secondary fire mode, boost around while keeping her in my sights, then fire the missiles from point-blank range. It took about six tries, but on the final one, I nailed her dead-on and took her out with a single volley.
The way I fought her was the equivalent of rolling double sixes to end a night, but fuck it, dignity is for other pilots.
I still have the save (with all her drops) on a PS2 memory card someplace.
- Joined
- Jun 2, 2020
I never dabbled in more than the first couple of AC games, and I frankly fucking sucked at them. Still, part of me is a little upset that FromSoft has let their flagship Giant Robot Dickpunching Simulator fall by the wayside...
... then I see shit like this and think that if they made one nowadays, I'm fairly certain someone would get Minecrafted over it.
I'd bet real money nobody playtested the final Nightmare fight in Devil May Cry 1.
- Joined
- Jun 27, 2014
I remember doing that fight on DMD. It was so bad that the generally accepted "method" to do it was to go through the game on another difficulty like 3 times to stock resources, then burn all of them on that fight. Like use every Untouchable you have. To shit with Ranking, you can use Super Dante for that.
Sir Wesley Tailpipe
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Jun 19, 2019
The one currently annoying me in a game I otherwise really enjoyed, in Days Gone, it’s impossible to wrap up all the storylines without either doing a New Game+ playthrough or doing so much grinding that it would be quicker to play through an NG+ to unlock what you need to clear the last few loose ends.
Gamepad
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Jul 1, 2019
Playtesting is still quite a bit of a luxury. Throw in creators who wouldn't take the opinion of plebs to adjust their game, and you end up with a bit of titles who feel like they couldn't be bothered to even get their friends to play it.
Only just beat it on hard after taking a break, but I was planning on beating it that way on Dante Must Die after that experience (been 12 years since I beat it on normal so I forgot just how difficult it was and chalked it up to eight-year-old me sucking at games). Honestly though, it wouldn't be too bad if they didn't restrict dodging to sideways-only for absolutely no reason.
- Joined
- Jan 17, 2019
Which storylines are you struggling with? I don't recall having to grind for them, let alone go into NG+.
Sir Wesley Tailpipe
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Jun 19, 2019
The NERO sites. There’s one that absolutely requires level 3 nitrous for the bike, but it’s pretty much impossible to get the smaller millitia camp to maximum trust, which is required to get the part.
- Joined
- Apr 5, 2019
Playing Ghost of Tsushima's online Legends mode, and oh boy does it have some bullshit baked right in that needs to be fixed.
First up, servers suffer from a horrible desync issue where enemies position/animation is not synchronized with what you see as the player, and it occasionally is so bad that an enemy could be doing an idle animation and you suddenly take a shit ton of damage. It never works in the player's advantage, it's always to the player's detriment.
Secondly, ghost enemies are cunts. They have a variable transparency going from 0% to 40% that fluctuates over time. The idea is to create challenge by making it harder for you to read what enemies are doing to react. Problem is that some attacks have a long wind up, but the flair that indicates an attack as parry-only or unblock-able is short. So if the enemy is fully transparent for that wind up, you're not going to be able to respond.
Now, pair both of those issues together, and during the gold/nightmare missions, gold/nightmare survivals and the raids, invisible enemies will just one shot you because fuck you, enjoy getting res'd every 2 minutes because an invisible samurai feels like spamming unblock-ables while the server drops out of sync.
First up, servers suffer from a horrible desync issue where enemies position/animation is not synchronized with what you see as the player, and it occasionally is so bad that an enemy could be doing an idle animation and you suddenly take a shit ton of damage. It never works in the player's advantage, it's always to the player's detriment.
Secondly, ghost enemies are cunts. They have a variable transparency going from 0% to 40% that fluctuates over time. The idea is to create challenge by making it harder for you to read what enemies are doing to react. Problem is that some attacks have a long wind up, but the flair that indicates an attack as parry-only or unblock-able is short. So if the enemy is fully transparent for that wind up, you're not going to be able to respond.
Now, pair both of those issues together, and during the gold/nightmare missions, gold/nightmare survivals and the raids, invisible enemies will just one shot you because fuck you, enjoy getting res'd every 2 minutes because an invisible samurai feels like spamming unblock-ables while the server drops out of sync.
- Joined
- Jan 17, 2019
- Joined
- Aug 7, 2018
The Water Temple in TLoZ: Ocarina of Time. Mainly because there's zero indicators as to how to get around in the dungeon to get certain small keys to complete certain objectives such as getting to the mini boss (Dark Link) and then eventually getting the boss key to take on the boss. You could have one small key left to get but, because of zero indicators as to where to go as I said, you could still be spending hours lowering and raising the water level to navigate around this behemoth of a dungeon before finally stumbling upon some corridor with it there and feeling stupid afterwards. That and also pausing and unpausing constantly for equipping/unequipping the Iron Boots was quite annoying. While it was more on the annoying side than difficult, it was still bullshit.
From what I've seen the 3DS remake of the game made significant changes to the dungeon to make it way less annoying and made the Iron Boots an item you no longer have to pause for. While I never got to play this version myself I have to believe many people also playing the game were quite relieved.
From what I've seen the 3DS remake of the game made significant changes to the dungeon to make it way less annoying and made the Iron Boots an item you no longer have to pause for. While I never got to play this version myself I have to believe many people also playing the game were quite relieved.
- Joined
- Nov 4, 2020
- Joined
- Feb 11, 2017
I hate QTEs in general. I'm getting old and my reflexes, which were never that great in the first place, are not what they used to be 
Also, the Great Crystal in FFXII can eat shit. Hope you like going through an absolute maze of virtually identical rooms! Also, if you get wrecked by the superboss at the end, I think you have to go all the way back through again.
Also, the Great Crystal in FFXII can eat shit. Hope you like going through an absolute maze of virtually identical rooms! Also, if you get wrecked by the superboss at the end, I think you have to go all the way back through again.
- Joined
- Sep 17, 2020
Playing Assassin's Creed Origins, and mainly enjoying it cuz Ancient Egypt is the bomb.
But it has this awful fake difficulty mechanic where if you are too many levels below an enemy you do miniscule damage. I hate this shit, it ruins the immersion for me and is a cheap and lazy way to create difficulty.
I've not played Odyssey but i wouldn't be surprised if it does it too.
Also the modern day bullshit in Assassins Creed. I really fucking wished they never begun that shit in the first game. I don't care for this unlikeable Layla chick and im not going to read all her bullshit on her laptop about the fucking animus or make sense of the dull modern day story.
If they carried on the database for historical stuff in Origins i'd of gladly read that, but i've got to do some discovery tour of the game, which is really neat for education, but doesn't respect my time as much.
But it has this awful fake difficulty mechanic where if you are too many levels below an enemy you do miniscule damage. I hate this shit, it ruins the immersion for me and is a cheap and lazy way to create difficulty.
I've not played Odyssey but i wouldn't be surprised if it does it too.
Also the modern day bullshit in Assassins Creed. I really fucking wished they never begun that shit in the first game. I don't care for this unlikeable Layla chick and im not going to read all her bullshit on her laptop about the fucking animus or make sense of the dull modern day story.
If they carried on the database for historical stuff in Origins i'd of gladly read that, but i've got to do some discovery tour of the game, which is really neat for education, but doesn't respect my time as much.
- Joined
- Apr 5, 2019
I remember getting lost in their for way too long looking for the superboss only to give it, try to leave and stumble upon him.I hate QTEs in general. I'm getting old and my reflexes, which were never that great in the first place, are not what they used to be
Also, the Great Crystal in FFXII can eat shit. Hope you like going through an absolute maze of virtually identical rooms! Also, if you get wrecked by the superboss at the end, I think you have to go all the way back through again.
- Joined
- Aug 24, 2020
Been playing Plutonia Experiment.
Archiviles and Revenants are the bane of my existence now.
Archiviles and Revenants are the bane of my existence now.
BScCollateral
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- May 28, 2018
I haven't played the games, but I'm struck at how common this opinion is.
IIRC, the Mighty Jingles' playthrough of AC: Odyssey cut out everything in the modern era.