Chris' thought process

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One thing about Chris's thought processes that will never stop amazing me is how he prioritizes negative events in his life.

Megan owes Chris an anime thing and asked him not to grope her. He remembers that stupid DVD down to probably the ASIN, and Megan is a callous bitch who should never have been born.

BlueSpike held Chris's beloved videogames hostage until he painfully sodomized himself in front of like ten people with the only thing he considered sacred and good in life, in a chat so vile I will never be able to listen to it. He later found out that this performance was for a 13-year-old boy with whom he had also been having lengthy phone sex.

When he made this discovery, the only thing he could come up with was that BlueSpike was "a brat", and he seems to have actually forgotten that any of this happened or at least considered it no more noteworthy than any other trolling he's been subjected to. But MUH SAILR MOON!!

Just. fuckin. I don't know. Chris.
 
deeman said:
If i close my eyes really heard and tell myself i´m not gay, then i´m not gay!
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Oh god. Somebody shoop a Sorting Hat on Chris, and make this his "Please not Slytherin, please not Slytherin" plea.

Chris: "I'm not gay, I'm not gay.."
SH: "DON'T WANNA BE A GAY, EH? YOU'D DO WELL BEING GAY!"
 
Rapeclock.jpg
 
Pinhead said:
Oh god. Somebody shoop a Sorting Hat on Chris, and make this his "Please not Slytherin, please not Slytherin" plea.

Chris: "I'm not gay, I'm not gay.."
SH: "DON'T WANNA BE A GAY, EH? YOU'D DO WELL BEING GAY!"
Click to expand...
This is fantastic.
 
Why does he think Cole should have invited them to his wedding? I get that Chris is stupid. I get that Cole is a pissant. Considering that, Barb would be responsable for an almost comedic amount of abuse if even an echo of Cole says about her is true. Contrary to what some people might think; this isn't something one usually lies about(barring Chris, maybe).

Edit: I know it sounds a-loggy and might belong in the random questions thread. I'm just trying to understand the thought process.
 
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jharwel1 said:
Why does he think Cole should have invited them to his wedding? I get that Chris is stupid. I get that Cole is a pissant. Considering that, Barb would be responsable for an almost comedic amount of abuse if even an echo of Cole says about her is true. Contrary to what some people might think; this isn't something one usually lies about(barring Chris, maybe).

Edit: I know it sounds a-loggy and might belong in the random questions thread. I'm just trying to understand the thought process.
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Well, normally it's really rude not to invite your own mother to your wedding, but inviting Barb sounds like a recipe for disaster. He probably knows more about Barb than we do (and that's saying a lot).
 
Chris to Megan: "Be grateful that I didn't rape you."
 
"This is a comic for the whole family. Better have a plot about Rosechu doing pornography and crushing a troll to death with her pussy."
and of course
"This is a comic for the whole family. Better have a scene where my enemies are brutally and gorily executed."
 
"People will watch a 4hr DVD about my life."

And yet, and yet - he was actually correct about this one...
 
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