Culinary Atrocities - Crimes against food

avocado on toast is apparently a thing among trendy city types, which just goes to show there's one born every minute

Sounds more like something trendy than an abomination. If you make this yourself it's probably pretty cheap. My guess is they charge a lot for something that is probably a dime worth of food, though.

I've had a thing like this that's just half-assed caprese salad on toast for years, i.e. sliced tomato and mozzarella on toast with some balsamic and herbs.
 
I am surprised no one has posted this classic.

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What is that? It looks like a much nicer* version of the exact same hamburger DoubleSwee cooked.

*"Nicer" meaning presentation. They are both raw hamburger meat.
 
if the liquid doesn't contain some kind of preservative, that could be bacterial contamination; like many unmodified saccharides, glucomannan is excellent bug food
It's lyme and some weird preservative. It is so pungent and raunchy it would be hard to tell if it were spoiled... . The desperation of people for low calorie pasta astounds me when there are zucchini noodles and spaghetti squash.

avocado on toast is apparently a thing among trendy city types, which just goes to show there's one born every minute

they're probably the same folk who drink soy lattes and get excited about the Nintendo Switch
A hippy told me the same recipe like 15 years ago. It's good with salt and pepper, wheat toast only though. I think it's for people who don't want to eat butter or margarine.
 
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It's lyme and some weird preservative. It is so pungent and raunchy it would be hard to tell if it were spoiled... . The desperation of people for low calorie pasta astounds me when there are zucchini noodles and spaghetti squash.
Isn't this the stuff anorexics use? Because it's indigestible you don't actually get any nutrition from it. There might be a calorie or two from zucchini noodles.
 
Isn't this the stuff anorexics use? Because it's indigestible you don't actually get any nutrition from it. There might be a calorie or two from zucchini noodles.

It's advertised fairly often on pro-ana sites. I'm sure some normal dieters use it, too, but if they do, they're putting actual food on it.
 
Isn't this the stuff anorexics use? Because it's indigestible you don't actually get any nutrition from it. There might be a calorie or two from zucchini noodles.
On the boards I read...no. you can just take pills of fiber if you want to fill up on it. You only try miracle noodles if you are desperate for pasta, the exact opposite of anorexia. For them eating food causes intense anxiety symptoms.
 
It's advertised fairly often on pro-ana sites. I'm sure some normal dieters use it, too, but if they do, they're putting actual food on it.
It's used as an ingredient in some traditional Chinese and Japanese foods, especially soups and hot-pot type dishes where it's mixed in with other ingredients like noodles, vegetables, and meat in a flavorful broth. It absorbs the flavor of the broth and has a chewy texture. It's also called konnyaku or konjac. It's been eaten for a few hundred years in east Asia, and it's only recently that ana skellies have latched onto it as a replacement for real food.

It would taste fucking terrible with pasta sauce on it, that's not what it's for.
 
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It's lyme and some weird preservative. It is so pungent and raunchy it would be hard to tell if it were spoiled... . The desperation of people for low calorie pasta astounds me when there are zucchini noodles and spaghetti squash.

now that makes sense

pickling lime (calcium hydroxide) is a very strong alkali, and over time it breaks down proteins into their constituent amino acids; under strongly alkaline conditions, amino acids then get broken down further into carboxylic acids and volatile amines, and volatile amines have characteristically fishy smells
 
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