CWC jokes

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What did Chris say when the trolls dug up Patti?

NOOOOOOOOOOO! PATTAAAAY! PATTAAAAAY!
 
How does Chris put in a light bulb?

He holds the bulb in the socket and expects the world to revolve around him.

What's the only kind of change Chris isn't resistant to?

Pennies rolling across the floor.
 
What do laxatives and jerkops have in common with Chris?

They make him shit real fast.

Aw, looks like Chris is going for a meltdown...

... a tuna meltdown down his fucking throat! (- courtesy of Yucko the Clown)[/SPOILER}
 
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Why does Chris miss social cues?

He has autism.

Why is Chris depressed so often?

He is very lonely.
 
What did kids yell to Chris when he dressed up as a grey Sonichu?

TOTORO!

What is Chris' favorite movie?

Barb-wire.

Looks like Chris can jog a lot every day...

... to the next McDonalds restaurant!
 
This is outdated, stupid, and :julay: but I want to come up with something…

The phone at 14 Branchland Court had rung up to 10 times, any non-troll individual with business to discuss with the Chandlers knew that they needed to wait for that many rings so somebody would answer. Apparently, the Chandlers had some sort of code.

Chris: Hmmm, hello?

Woman: Hi, Mr. Chandler? My name is Patty Crane, I am an officer of the Greene County Loan department.

Chris: Hmmm, yeah.

Patty: Mr. Chandler, I was calling because we wanted to inform you that your loan is soon to default. Are you fully aware of what this means? I advise you sort out some sort of income-based plan to-

Chris: Hmmm, Patty. Do you have a boyfriend?

Patty: Uh, Mr. Chandler?

Chris: Hmmm, you have a very pretty voice…

Patty: Uh, Mr. Chandler, this is highly inappropriate. I was calling to inform you of a dangerous financial situation.

Chris: PAAATTTTAAAAAAYYYY!!! PAAAATTTTTTAAAAAYYYYY!!!!
 
Feel free to improve this to make it better

What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little troll? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in PVCC, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on The GAMe PLACe, and I get over $300 in my :tugboat:. I am trained in CADD and I’m the top autistic in Ruckersville, Virginia. You are nothing to me but just another troll. I will zap you to the extreme with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to my ps3? Think again, troll. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of electric hedgehogs across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that zaps the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, troll. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my megatron pistol. Not only am I extensively trained in fanta drinking, but I have access to all the money of my tugboat and I will use it to its full extent to buy sex toys and use them to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.
 
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What is Chris's favorite Beatles song?

None would immediately come to mind.
 
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