Let's Sperg Darkest Dungeon Let's Sperg: Part 2 - A Quest of Autism and Lovecraftian Horror

[Jaimas]

Ambivalenz came razor-close to death this go-round. Blight and bleed are major killers, and if she wasn't off death's door by the time her turn rolled around, there's a high chance that could have killed her entirely.

Solz to the rescue.

 

[Solzhenitsyn]

Ohana means family. Family means no-one gets left behind.

 

[AnOminous]

This team has proven to be one of my strongest, and Ambi technically fits the role better than @c-no, who has been moved to Jaimas' team. Key to this is the team's uncanny resilience: Solz and Boldy are staggeringly hard to catch and their ability to deal good damage at the same time is second to none.

And I'm chopped liver, apparently. *sobs*

 

[Jaimas]

And I'm chopped liver, apparently. *sobs*

Actually, you're currently at 4 bosses killed (More than any other character) and your team is arguably by second-strongest after Boldy's. Also it's up next.

 

[Jaimas]

A new delivery of fresh recruits enables some additional team potential - but at the cost of forcing a bit more level-building. Still, we need all the help we can get. Our team gathers @Optimus Prime, @Feline Darkmage, @NotAKitty, and @vertexwindi and add them to the existing teams; by sending them out on short excursions with our existing teams, we can get them up in level right quickly. It is risky, however, as the teams do have to fight while protecting their new redshirts. Still, it is more than possible, and as seen from Optimus, the result is a pretty good payoff:

Our veterans quickly reorganize to accommodate the newcomers and tighten their tactics up, with Lolwut, Burned Man, and Jaimas' teams seeing some shake-up.

 

[Optimus Prime]

"Adventurer Abomination"

Yeah that sounds about right.

 

[Jaimas]

Vertex's original avatar turned out not to be a keeper, due to a complete lack of perks and the fact that I already have two Arbalests. I fired her and we are currently holding out for a Graverobber, which is something our teams desperately need a second of.

Weeks 75-78 featured some of the most resource-intensive bullshit I've dealt with and our trio of new recruits battered in both mind and body but alive. Having survived their first brush with death and darkness, they're gradually improving to "alive," though I admit that none of them would have survived if it weren't for Varg tanking for NotAKitty and Lolwut murdering everything in his path.

 

[Feline Darkmage]

"Seeker Vestal"
What am I seeking?

 

[Jaimas]

"Seeker Vestal"
What am I seeking?

It's the rank.
0 = Seeker
1 = Apprentice
2 = Adventurer
3 = Seasoned
4 = Veteran
5 = Master
6 = Champion

Sadly, I have terrible news for this run.

Today I encountered.... Something. I don't know if it was a bug, glitch, programming error, or simply some gigantic clusterfuck of Murphy's Law striking, but it completely has destroyed this run.

I was doing the Mark Boyd (Siren) Mission on champion, and what I found was a brutal fight to get there followed by a nasty boss fight. We were more than halfway through the fight, but I doubted our chances because we kept getting hammered. I took a short break, made dinner, booted the game back up and prepared to resume, figuring that even if I lost someone in the fight, I could at the very least retreat and cut losses. I had already killed a minion so there wasn't any problems, or so I thought.

Enter the issue.

The save loads, and despite it ostensibly being Meowthkip's turn when I took a break, the boss proceeds to take both turns at once, followed by every other member of the boss's team getting a chance to wail on the already-battered team, who is allowed to take no turns. When the team finally is able to react, they're stunned because of the combination of the boss, a minion jellyfish, and one of my own party members. The entire team is butchered, completely unable to do anything because of some bizarre fuck-up, and I am not sure what fucking happened. When I get back to town, it lists everyone involved as dead, and treats the entire mission as all hands lost. Also it says that Wallace was lost week one.

So because of what may very well have been a coding fuck-up (not the first one I've seen in this game when it comes to loading saves, mind you), not only have I lost @Wallace, @AnOminous, @A Random, and @Meowthkip, but I've lost all equipment they happened to have and all the money spent on their expedition. That included the rare trinket Random had, and the Ancestral Meowthkip had. At least I get the Trophy trinkets back.

Again, I don't know if this was due to a coding problem, or just the game deciding it was going to fuck me with malice aforethought for my sin of closing it out, but what happened happened. Either way, lesson learned: Under no circumstances quit game during a battle if you can help it, or the game may just decide "fuck you, your shit gets wrecked today."

We basically can't finance another outing without mass-selling-off equipment, we're out four characters that I'd spent conservatively a hundred thousand gold and about 12 hours on, and I'm finding myself reminded of why this game remains so fucking divisive.

I intend to recover from this absolute fucking horse-shit. I will re-create this old team from scratch (with improvements) and though it won't have the same shiny trinkets, I can be damned sure it will be both tougher and more pissed off than the last one. I will shit Autism and this game will drown in it. Prepare for the storm, maggot.

 

[A Random]

MOTHER FUCKER I WANT MY REVENGE ON THAT FUCKING BOYD

 

[Jaimas]

MOTHER FUCKER I WANT MY REVENGE ON THAT FUCKING BOYD

It is coming.

So far, of the new recruits, Meowthkip II and Wallace II have arrived. Meowth has undergone a class change, and Wallace has more training ahead. You'll see as time allows.

Active teams so far:

Spoiler: Details

Team Cash Grind: @Ravelord, @CasualSeppuku, @Cynical, @Ambivalenz
Predominantly for cash-grinds in the ruins. Low on attack power with Ravelord being the main heavy hitter, Seppuku still manages to bring the thunder when required. In exchange the team has phenomenal defense and utility and generally is capable of surviving anything.

Team Discovery Channel: @Jaimas, @Ol'_Slag, @Shuu Iwamine, @c-no
Strongest team as far as overall damage output goes except for the one below. When you need massive firepower, this team gets the call. Behold bleed stacks that can do 24+ a round.

Team Fuck the World: @Feline Darkmage, @BOLDYSPICY!, @Solzhenitsyn, @Cosmos Strongest offensive team by far. Crushes opponents with a blend of marks and heavy damage that rips even the toughest enemies to shreds, as Darkmage heals the party up.

Team Face-Punch: @Techpriest, @NotAKitty, @Randall Fragg, @Varg Did Nothing Wrong
Alex swapped to the team below, resulting in both teams becoming far stronger. NotAKitty adds much-needed damage to the squad, while still offering healing and stun services. One thing the team really didn't need was combat drugs when it already has Varg and Randall on it. Christ.

Team Juggernaut: @Burned Man, @alex_theman, @Ruin, @RJ MacReady
Unstoppable. This team is all about attrition fights, which it always wins. Ruin is a front-line Vestal and that can and should scare the shit out of any enemy stupid enough to get close, because her Hand of Light debuff can turn even the strongest monster into a joke while Burned Man and RJ tear it to shreds. Alex provides all the best drugs and stuns (and touching romantic interludes with our favorite plagued warrior).

Team Smashfucker: @Optimus Prime, @lolwut, @KidKitty
The loss of Team AWMA was a harsh blow for Team Smashfucker, as they lost some of their closest buddies. By pairing three of our best debuffers and murderers together, the result is surprisingly heavy damagestacking on rows 2-3. The team is in dire need of an occultist for a healer, however, and needs to stop borrowing fucking Techpriest. Once they get that, I expect little will be able to stand in their way.

More details on the new teams as they come together.

 

[Jan_Hus]

Can I be a character?

 

[Jaimas]

Can I be a character?

We needed another Occultist for Team Smashfucker. You're hired.

 

[alex_theman]

Just use a save editor.

 

[Wallace]

Darkest Dungeon is like being in an abusive relationship. You know they’re going to hurt you, and yet you just keep going back, thinking that it’ll be different this time.

 

[Jaimas]

Darkest Dungeon is like being in an abusive relationship. You know they’re going to hurt you, and yet you just keep going back, thinking that it’ll be different this time.

Only in this case it's discovering a programming fuck-up.

Just use a save editor.

No way. I've played this one straight from the start and I'm not about to undo all that now.

 

[Burned Man]

Only in this case it's discovering a programming fuck-up.

There should have been an Ancestor line when you got back into the fight. Something to chastise you and explain the slaughter like, "Leaving in the middle of a battle is cowardice and cowardice spreads like wildfire."
Also rip to a flawless victory we'll just have to settle for major decisive victory instead.

 

[Meowthkip]

It's the rank.
0 = Seeker
1 = Apprentice
2 = Adventurer
3 = Seasoned
4 = Veteran
5 = Master
6 = Champion

Sadly, I have terrible news for this run.

Today I encountered.... Something. I don't know if it was a bug, glitch, programming error, or simply some gigantic clusterfuck of Murphy's Law striking, but it completely has destroyed this run.

I was doing the Mark Boyd (Siren) Mission on champion, and what I found was a brutal fight to get there followed by a nasty boss fight. We were more than halfway through the fight, but I doubted our chances because we kept getting hammered. I took a short break, made dinner, booted the game back up and prepared to resume, figuring that even if I lost someone in the fight, I could at the very least retreat and cut losses. I had already killed a minion so there wasn't any problems, or so I thought.

Enter the issue.

The save loads, and despite it ostensibly being Meowthkip's turn when I took a break, the boss proceeds to take both turns at once, followed by every other member of the boss's team getting a chance to wail on the already-battered team, who is allowed to take no turns. When the team finally is able to react, they're stunned because of the combination of the boss, a minion jellyfish, and one of my own party members. The entire team is butchered, completely unable to do anything because of some bizarre fuck-up, and I am not sure what fucking happened. When I get back to town, it lists everyone involved as dead, and treats the entire mission as all hands lost. Also it says that Wallace was lost week one.

So because of what may very well have been a coding fuck-up (not the first one I've seen in this game when it comes to loading saves, mind you), not only have I lost @Wallace, @AnOminous, @A Random, and @Meowthkip, but I've lost all equipment they happened to have and all the money spent on their expedition. That included the rare trinket Random had, and the Ancestral Meowthkip had. At least I get the Trophy trinkets back.

Again, I don't know if this was due to a coding problem, or just the game deciding it was going to fuck me with malice aforethought for my sin of closing it out, but what happened happened. Either way, lesson learned: Under no circumstances quit game during a battle if you can help it, or the game may just decide "fuck you, your shit gets wrecked today."

We basically can't finance another outing without mass-selling-off equipment, we're out four characters that I'd spent conservatively a hundred thousand gold and about 12 hours on, and I'm finding myself reminded of why this game remains so fucking divisive.

I intend to recover from this absolute fucking horse-shit. I will re-create this old team from scratch (with improvements) and though it won't have the same shiny trinkets, I can be damned sure it will be both tougher and more pissed off than the last one. I will shit Autism and this game will drown in it. Prepare for the storm, maggot.

I can't believe I'm fucking dead.

 

[Jaimas]

I can't believe I'm fucking dead.

You got better.

It took some time, but the new and improved gang's back together:

Team AWMA rides again. @AnOminous, @Meowthkip, @A Random, and @Wallace are on a long journey of self-mastery. They will get stronger; they will recover, and they will introduce their opposition to the ground. This time, with uniforms and significantly boosted gear and tactical options. What happened last time will never be allowed to repeat. But let's get right the fuck into it and discuss how much better this team is than its predecessor, despite a lack of perks:

Right out the gate, this team has more flexibility: Bleed, Blight, Marking, Stuns, Tanking, Heals. The only thing this team desperately needs is a Commander's Seal for AnOminous, and I get the feeling one will show itself eventually. Wallace is particularly utilitarian; he lacks Lolwut's damage but he makes up for it with a variety of tactical options. Blinding enemies with POCKET SAND is just the start.

Meowthkip 1.0 was an Antiquarian: A versatile hero whose main job is support and financial assistance. Antiquarians are weak in a fight but can make everyone else a lot more dangerous. Meowthkip 2.0 is a Grave Robber. Focused on ranged damage, she can do good damage, hit multiple foes, and she has Shadow Fade if she somehow winds up in the front rows to do good damage and make her return to the back where she belongs. The damage improvement over her previous setup is almost 150%; the kill ratio of the squad has fucking skyrocketed. More on that in a moment.

AnOminous is basically the same, but has swapped out Morale Boost for Holy Lance. Holy Lance is a back-row attack that's only useful if he gets pushed to the back line; it allows him to move up one square and hit any enemy square at the same time with a fairly-solid attack that gains a damage bonus against Unholy critters, just like his Smite attack. He also has Zealous Persecution, because sometimes you wanna whip out a damaging shitpost. This blend makes AnOminous more focused on offense when a smattering of heals when required; he's lost stress healing but with this team, enemies don't survive long enough to do heavy stress.

Random is basically the same as ever, with a strong focus on ranged damage. Her moves, too, have been changed up though: I ripped out Bolas Shot in favor of Blindfire, which gives her a bit more utility; she can take a potshot that will boost her speed and hits a random enemy space (targetting standing enemies first). If an enemy's not marked yet, she needs to target the front rank, or if she needs the buff, this skill helps a lot. She also has the Medic's Greaves, to boost her healing power.

Our team managed to bring back a shitload of treasure this run. Almost enough to pay for an entire squad's upgrades.

The most devastating advantage of this team, however, is its combination strike. What's that? A boss or tough enemy is in the way?

Wallace can lead off by marking it and ripping its PROT off.

Meowthkip's daggers get bonus damage and criticals from Marks.

So do Random's Arrows.

So does Wallace's Axe Strike.

Normally, AnOminous wouldn't gain any damage bonus against marks, but with Brigand Vvulf's Trophy Trinket, he does. Because of this, we now have a dedicated marking party without actually having one that also happens to have secondary effects.

When the situation calls for it, the team also has every status effect. Meowthkip has these nasty little throwing darts that have a very high Blight Chance and equally-terrifying Blight Damage (Capping at 5/round - second only to the Plague Doctor!), but only targets one enemy. Similarly, Wallace has a strong Bleed but it only can hit the back two ranks. We also have a two stuns (Shadow Fade and Flashbang).

So this team has:

Two low-mid-tier healers (AnOminous and Random)
Two characters with Stuns (Wallace and Meowthkip)
Three characters with multitarget attacks (AnOminous, Random, and Meowthkip)
Two characters with Status Effects (Wallace and Meowthkip)
Four members who benefit from Marks

This encounter is normally pretty dangerous, but it's cake for this party. Mark the Swinetaur, and the team kills it in a round and a half of sustained attacks.

Now for the best part: This team just pulled off a Veteran Dungeon at level 2 average.

 

[Solzhenitsyn]

What is dead may never die, but rises again, harder and stronger!

Glad to see the game's bullshit didn't drag you down.