- Joined
- Mar 11, 2015
Oh, you wanted to move quickly? Sorry, but you have to roll for that too. And you fail. You trip and land face down in a puddle of two people's piss.
FATAL 2: The Fataling
- Thread starter Splendid
- Start date
- Joined
- Dec 28, 2014
I get pissed that this obvious fed snitch is running away and throw my now flaming flask of oil at him.
Then I pull out Thumper and smash the nearest person over the head. You can roll for that. Remember, it's a two-handed maul with ridiculous damage.
If I'm still alive after that, I try to ram an unlubed dildo up the ass of the nearest living person.
- Joined
- Dec 28, 2014
And considering my shroom-powered Paranoia that you just told me about, I act in accordance with it and my character's action on every round from now on is just to smash the nearest living person over the head with Thumper unless I say otherwise.
While demanding a pony. If someone buys me a pony I will stop.
- Joined
- Jun 18, 2014
Vlricus takes the john's money and sends body bumper away with him. He also climbs onto the nearest chair to avoid the piss puddle that is deeper to him than the others. He watches the commotion with interest.
- Joined
- Dec 12, 2015
- Joined
- Dec 12, 2015
Stupid-shit will wait outside the pub until one or more of these idiots kills the other idiot(s) while drunk.
- Joined
- Dec 28, 2014
I changed my mind. My first act before trying to murder everyone in sight is to chuck a burning flask of oil at whatever will set the whole place on fire first. Then I try to murder everyone in sight.
- Joined
- Feb 3, 2013
- Joined
- Dec 28, 2014
I chuck the oil at whatever is not immersed in piss. Preferably, at a person or a bugbear or whatever. Because fuck bugbears.
Also I really want to rape a bugbear.
So there's that.
- Joined
- Jun 18, 2014
You should start the raping before the fire starts. Those charred corpses in the caves learned that the hard way.
- Joined
- Mar 11, 2015
Ok
Ok
Ok
You toss the bottle on the countertop where it explodes and bursts into flames. Now the whole town is pissed at you guys. Again.
Ok
Alright, now Bugbears are gathering around everyone.
@ActualKiwi is attacked by a Bugbear that does 4 LP to his right arm.
@AnOminous is attacked by the bartender, who does 2 LP to his face. Also, I forgot to mention that the game doesn't mention when the effects of alcohol wear off either, so you're going to be vomiting drunk for the rest of your life.
@Caddchef kills a Bugbear child that attacks him by smashing his skull open.
@Burned Man's attacker misses him, but Burned Man overextends his counterattack and falls off of his chair down onto the urine.
- Joined
- Jun 18, 2014
Great now I'm soaked in piss and my ho is MIA, I'm not making a very good pimp.
Was this a port town or at least a town with a dock? I'm thinking now might be a good time to fight our way to a dock and hijack a ship.
- Joined
- Mar 11, 2015
Yeah, it's a port town. The rulebook heavily intimates that all Bugbear towns are port towns.
We don't know for sure. The world setting book, Nevaria, is like 15 pages long and was never finished. The same is true of all of the other supplement books, such as the monster manual.
But yeah, this one is definitely a port town.
- Joined
- Dec 12, 2015
I like how you're thinking.
@Splendid Meat Sticks I couldn't quite work it out- if I'm dual wielding do I just add the respective delivery penalties together and use that? Also does it increase my attacks per round, or is it still whatever I'd get with one weapon? Trying to decide on how to attack this bloody bugbear.
EDIT: my delivery penalty works out (for the original weapon, the hammer) at -9.5, because of my outrageous strength (would normally be a positive number). For the battleaxe it's 39.
So ok, if it's just additive- I could wield both of them together with only a combined DP of 29.5. Easy.
Both have identical damage roll formulas (like I used in the first fight) so all I need to know is your answer to the attacks-per-round thing SMS and then I'll beat several kinds of shit out of this bugbear.
Also, did the attack from the bugbear take into account my new armour? I've tabled it up on the spreadsheet, not sure if it updated properly though.
DR for my right arm is (in the format of B/H/P/S) Upper:36/31/30/30 , Lower: 41/37/37/37. So where in my arm did the bugbear hit? That'll change the result a bit.
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- Joined
- Dec 28, 2014
My character's dementia causes him to forget why everyone's attacking us, but I'm all for the hijacking a boat idea. If I have to, I bash the bartender over the head with Thumper and hightail it out of here.
- Joined
- Feb 3, 2013
"Well this is just great" Thinks Lazy-Carcass, "All i wanted was a quiet drink with friends and maybe one of FATAL's legendarily bad sexual encounters with an NPC but here i am fighting for my life against bugbear children with a stoned troll with dementia, a dwarf soaked in my own piss and a fellow ogre-bro with whom i have no problems".
Well now he's a child murderer i don't see a peaceful solution to this, looks like Lazy-Carcass going to own a boat after all, or die trying.
Thanks Obama.
Lazy-Carcass leaves the bar killing anyone who gets in his way and follows the others to the docks.
Well now he's a child murderer i don't see a peaceful solution to this, looks like Lazy-Carcass going to own a boat after all, or die trying.
Thanks Obama.
Lazy-Carcass leaves the bar killing anyone who gets in his way and follows the others to the docks.
- Joined
- Mar 11, 2015
As far as I can tell, as long as you hold each one in one hand, they count as two weapons, each with a seperate delivery penalty, but as usual, the rules are so fucked up that I can't tell. And I think that they count as one handed weapons in terms of attacks per round, but you don't get to attack once with each weapon for each attack you get in a round. Instead, you can just attack as though you're holding a one handed weapon, and you get to choose your weapon. This means that you can actually become more agile and capable of attacking more often in FATAL by picking up a piece of scrap wood and wielding it like a club if you're strong enough!
Ok, he's dead and you passed your check to run. You are now at an unguarded merchant vessel. Its a sailboat, so it will suffer from being undermanned much less than a rowboat.
You make it to the dock safely and get aboard the boat too.
And don't feel obligated to post today. Happy Valentine's Day!