Goyslop confessional thread. - The first step of recovery is to admit you have a problem.

[Gan Ying]

After not drinking soda for something like 14 years straight, I had a relatively brief but intense addiction to Diet Pepsi last year. Like 4 months of drinking 5 a day, then dropped down to 1 a day for a few months after that. I eat a lot of convenience store food as well because it's really good in this country for how cheap it tends to be.

 

[Baguette Child]

I like Little Caesar's crazy bread.

It's godawful for me in every way. I know this. But I can't help it. I get one almost every night on the way in to work. It's literally like crack for me. I can't survive my 16 hour overnight hospital shift without a bag.


I don't consume a lot of other goyshit foods or sodas but this one particular item somehow has a grasp on my soul. I fear it shall be my undoing. I need help but my husband is a fellow crazybread addict and thus no help on that front.

 

[Xarpho's Return]

I've always heard the word "goyslop" and thought it was just a funny meme that only meant to refer to food from joints like mcdonalds and burger king, but from reading the thread it seems even things like sugar and white bread are supposed to be included in this term, Would like to see if someone can make a whole criterion list identifying what exactly makes a food item goyslop. Is it just supposed to be an antithesis to a healthy diet? or does it have to have something specific to be goyslop?

I dunno, I thought goyslop was processed foodstuffs or fast food, so Big Macs and Twinkies would fall into that. But then you have something like Coca-Cola. It's highly commercialized and company is globohomo, but it's been around for over a hundred years and I don't see why Coca-Cola would be goyslop but some other similar soft drink isn't.

 

[JambledUpWords]

If anyone has any suggestions to deal with this, I'll try them.

If you’re craving soda, I suggest this brand:

Low sugar, and roughly 25 calories per can. It’s not as sweet as regular soda, but if you need something fizzy and sweet, it’s a good compromise

If you want something that’s cold and chocolatey, I suggest this:

You should obviously be mindful of how many calories are in it (90 per serving). Also, it has some fiber and fat in it to keep satiated

If you really need ice cream, I suggest this:

Due to the nature of being a bar, you’ll be more aware of how much you’re eating at once. The issue with pint ice cream is that it typically has 2.5 servings per container, so you can end up easily getting 900 calories of ice cream out of a single pint without thinking about it

Obviously, sometimes you just need the real deal, and that isn’t bad, but going for lower calorie and lower sugar treats for a while instead can help you savor the times you do get the very sugary treats.

 

[JoseRaulChupacabra]

I like Whoppers and BigMacs. Fries as well, a fuck ton of it. I thought about getting one for lunch today, but decided against it and went to the Korean store instead to buy some fish cake.

 

[Dread First]

my husband is a fellow crazybread addict and thus no help on that front

Not sure if you tried this or if it's infeasible in your specific situation, but have you considered a "project" with your husband where you guys recreate the crazy bread from scratch?

It's not the same thing, I'm sure your work schedules are different, and I don't know how invested either of you would be in such an endeavour.

Having said that: it would be a shared activity that ultimately culminates in a home-cooked snack item. At best: you save some money in the long term over a night or two's worth of junk food. At worst? You have a funny story to tell your coworkers while on your break.

Pickling and fermenting foods does broadly align with male interest. If you guys wanna make a sourdough starter and use that for the bread, more power to ya!

 

[Tablet County]

Not sure if you tried this or if it's infeasible in your specific situation, but have you considered a "project" with your husband where you guys recreate the crazy bread from scratch?

It's not the same thing, I'm sure your work schedules are different, and I don't know how invested either of you would be in such an endeavour.

Having said that: it would be a shared activity that ultimately culminates in a home-cooked snack item. At best: you save some money in the long term over a night or two's worth of junk food. At worst? You have a funny story to tell your coworkers while on your break.

Pickling and fermenting foods does broadly align with male interest. If you guys wanna make a sourdough starter and use that for the bread, more power to ya!

For a second I thought this was a @Fields Of Rye post.

Thread tax: as much hatred I hold in my heart for the term "goyslop", I've gotta say some Subway sandwiches aren't half bad.

 

[Dread First]

Thread tax: as much hatred I hold in my heart for the term "goyslop", I've gotta say some Subway sandwiches aren't half bad.

It really depends on the quality of your local Subway. It's easy to forget that few, if any, corporately-owned Subway stores exist. Almost all of them are franchised.

The Subway near my job is super fucking cheap with everything, even if you pay extra. Hardly any meat, barely any vegetables, lukewarm, and undersauced to the point of being unappetising. I've been to others where the opposite is true.

Tax: halal fast food joints are my late night weakness. $8.99 for a quarter pounder with fries and a canned drink? I'll take it!

 

[wtfNeedSignUp]

I ordered the Dominos Volcano pizza and liked it enough to order it again a week later. Having a good sauce can really redeem a mediocre pizza.

I've always heard the word "goyslop" and thought it was just a funny meme that only meant to refer to food from joints like mcdonalds and burger king, but from reading the thread it seems even things like sugar and white bread are supposed to be included in this term, Would like to see if someone can make a whole criterion list identifying what exactly makes a food item goyslop. Is it just supposed to be an antithesis to a healthy diet? or does it have to have something specific to be goyslop?

Like every internet slang it's been overused to irrelevancy. The criterion should be low effort, low quality, highly processed foods for relatively low price. It's not on the level that it would actually ruin your health, or even make you fat but you could be paying a bit more or make it yourself for way better results.

 

[The Feline Solution]

I'm in the process of eating a Cup Noodles cup as we speak. I am on the jump and have no time for cooking a real lunch. I have been eating like shit the past month and am gaining like a motherfucker. Don't look at me, i'm hideous.

Tax: halal fast food joints are my late night weakness. $8.99 for a quarter pounder with fries and a canned drink? I'll take it!

The muslim places turned to shit around here, haven't had a Döner in more than five years because of the skyrocketing prices, it's at 7€ now, i refuse paying that. More of a Shawarma guy anyways but same applies regarding prices. It's ridiculous.

 

[エボラちゃん]

Can OP update with pic rel:

I always buy a specific brand for frozen pizza for emergency laziness, they're pretty good on their own but I like to enhance them with extra cheese and tabasco...

 

[Jaded Optimist]

Every once and awhile I crave kraft singles/cheese whiz. My mom never bought that shit, but it reminds me of playmates at my low income friends houses.

 

[Baguette Child]

have you considered a "project" with your husband where you guys recreate the crazy bread from scratch?

That actually sounds pretty fun. We might try that this weekend, thanks for the idea!

 

[Tablet County]

I ordered the Dominos Volcano pizza and liked it enough to order it again a week later. Having a good sauce can really redeem a mediocre pizza.

Honestly I'd never had Dominos until like a year ago and I liked it. It wasn't great or anything, but the crust has this chewy quality to it that's sort of pleasant, like it's made from pretzel dough rather than pizza dough.

 

[Str8Bustah]

I really like Steak Pasties, Pork Pies and Sosij Rolls but I don't really know if they can be classed as goyslop.

 

[wtfNeedSignUp]

Honestly I'd never had Dominos until like a year ago and I liked it. It wasn't great or anything, but the crust has this chewy quality to it that's sort of pleasant, like it's made from pretzel dough rather than pizza dough.

My best Dominos experience was ordering it with coworkers while in France, due to absolutely fantastic local cheese stacked on it. Just having local ingredients in your goyslop can make it actually delicious.

I may as well make a confessional on how I prefer goyslop corpo pizzas over local pizzas with more artisanal style. Both the pricing and taste of the latter is worse. I had really good non-slop pizzas in Italy but those were cheaper and not stuck in their own ass about the toppings and style. It doesn't help that if I want to spend a good amount of money on something I'd rather have something with less carbs.

 

[The Feline Solution]

I had really good non-slop pizzas in Italy but those were cheaper and not stuck in their own ass about the toppings and style

I had some of the best, full-on slop pizzas in Italy/Sardinia. Pizza con Wurstel, which is pizza topped with sliced vienna sausages and Pizza con Patatine, pizza topped with thick, home-made fries. Baked in a Naples-style stone oven. Shit is absolutely delicious after a hard day of boozing on the beach.

 

[W00K #17]

I made a breakfast sandwich with government cheese and a precooked sausage patty on a bagel this morning. The egg was fresh though.

 

[Mike Matei's Penis]

I enjoyed some of the MCU movies.

 

[wtfNeedSignUp]

I had some of the best, full-on slop pizzas in Italy/Sardinia. Pizza con Wurstel, which is pizza topped with sliced vienna sausages and Pizza con Patatine, pizza topped with thick, home-made fries. Baked in a Naples-style stone oven. Shit is absolutely delicious after a hard day of boozing on the beach.

For me pizza on a snowy mountain after half a day of skiing. The colder the temperature outside, the tastier the pizza gets.