Artcow Half-dude / Ian Knau - Car Fucker

  • 🐕 I am attempting to get the site runnning as fast as possible. If you are experiencing slow page load times, please report it.
Half-dude said:
You guys are incredibly offended at the idea that cars are getting fucked. Can any of you actually explain why though? I'm genuinely curious because it doesn't make much sense. Why does the fact that there are cars out there owned by mechs that are getting dick/pussy? My first guess, no offense, is jealously... honestly. I mean, hypothetically if any of you here are having relationship dry spells or are still virgins. I suppose I can see why the fact that even cars are getting laid can be kind of infuriating. lol.. sorry. ehem. The other group of you seem strangely concerned, you worry that these cars aren't getting the consent they're owed when they're being fucked, you worry that they're being raped by evil ol' Half-dude who obviously just likes having the power to do whatever he wants to them even though I've repeatedly said that that's not the case and that I care a great deal about a car's happiness, feelings, and sexual satisfaction, and in fact care about them more then you guys do and that you're basically being kind of hypocritical for even making the argument. Not only because you know you don't genuinely care about your car's happiness, feelings, or sexual satisfaction or even acknowledge them AS a conscious being. But also because you shouldn't even care weather or not the car is consenting to sex if you REALLY believe that cars aren't conscious beings!
Click to expand...

I'm not offended dude, I just don't understand the appeal but I'm also weirdly curious because why wouldn't I be? It's a deviation from the norm and that's extremely interesting. You're not hurting anybody and as long as you're not fucking other people's cars and leaving jizz in strangers' tailpipes, then I don't see the problem.

While I find all the sperging about how totally wrong you are about cars having souls to be just as stupid as the idea that cars have souls, since you're obviously not going to change your mind over some rando berating you over it on the internet, I do find the concept interesting insomuch as it's a common thread in those with objectophilia, since objects are passive and therefore their "feelings" are projected onto them by the person who desires them. Also interesting is that objectophilia is apparently more common in women, and psychologists suggest it might be a way of having total control over a relationship in a way that they cannot have with humans. Do you think there's any truth to this, or does your belief in animism make this not even an issue for you?
 
Half-dude said:
You guys are incredibly offended at the idea that cars are getting fucked.
Click to expand...
Half-Dude, just between you and me, when I said that you fuck cars because they can't say no, the only point I was implying was how exceptional it is that you make up imaginary friends to have sex with you. Look, if you wanna use your car as some kind of enormous metal fleshlight, well, who am I to stop you? It really had nothing to do with me being upset that you're "raping" your imaginary friends; that doesn't even make sense, since they're not really real.

I have to admit, though, it's kind of fucking hilarious when you come back with "aww why now you suddenly care for them". Naw, dude... I still don't care about them; the remark is about you.
 
Half-dude said:
Then the MOST you can really claim is that I'm someone who's built up a delusion of romance with what's basically a gigantic motorized sex toy.
Click to expand...

Right. That’s exactly what it is. Aside from it being that you made it into a sex toy.

Also, what do you think of this car?

68AD6DC5-E8EB-49B9-9662-44743BD9E345.jpeg
 
  • Feels
Reactions: Varg Did Nothing Wrong
Meowthkip said:
I'm not offended dude, I just don't understand the appeal but I'm also weirdly curious because why wouldn't I be? It's a deviation from the norm and that's extremely interesting. You're not hurting anybody and as long as you're not fucking other people's cars and leaving jizz in strangers' tailpipes, then I don't see the problem.

While I find all the sperging about how totally wrong you are about cars having souls to be just as stupid as the idea that cars have souls, since you're obviously not going to change your mind over some rando berating you over it on the internet, I do find the concept interesting insomuch as it's a common thread in those with objectophilia, since objects are passive and therefore their "feelings" are projected onto them by the person who desires them. Also interesting is that objectophilia is apparently more common in women, and psychologists suggest it might be a way of having total control over a relationship in a way that they cannot have with humans. Do you think there's any truth to this, or does your belief in animism make this not even an issue for you?
Click to expand...

If it makes you feel better I have the exact same confusion you have but in the opposite way. I don't see how you guys can look at those big milky hips on a car, those sexy curvaceous faces and phallic tailpipes and not be turned on. The frustration is just as bad on my end, to me it's like seeing a bunch of Pamela Andersons in her prime clones all owned by people and they all fucking go their whole lives virgins.. and the only thing people use them for is to mow their grass. It's like a fucking waste of opportunity! You've seen my diagrams comparing car body areas to body areas on a person right? You still can't see it?

That definition of Objectiphilia is the psycho-bable definition, that or you got it from that StrangeLove documentary. If you asked any Objectiphile they'd probably be offended at the very idea. I honestly don't see where the psychological society gets off on making that definition, because they've never even made any kinds of extensive studies or research into it, and the only one who has, Amy Marsh, stands behind it being an orientation not a fetish. I remember reading an article about mechiphiles where it basically says no scientific research has even been put into it because it's assumed to not be worth the effort.... fuckers.

Also yes, one word 'animism' almost all OS people believe in animism, after all people's believes ARE shaped by their experiences.

gREEEEEEEEEr said:
Half-Dude, just between you and me, when I said that you fuck cars because they can't say no, the only point I was implying was how exceptional it is that you make up imaginary friends to have sex with you. Look, if you wanna use your car as some kind of enormous metal fleshlight, well, who am I to stop you? It really had nothing to do with me being upset that you're "raping" your imaginary friends; that doesn't even make sense, since they're not really real.

I have to admit, though, it's kind of fucking hilarious when you come back with "aww why now you suddenly care for them". Naw, dude... I still don't care about them; the remark is about you.
Click to expand...

That... does not make any sense to me. There's got to be a more direct way of you saying that. You could have just said "fuck you you're fucking imaginary friends" but you decided to do this convoluted 'if cars are alive have they consented? You're raping them' angle.. honestly feels like you're answer above is a cop out.. I don't really think that's what you were trying to say.

Spider Jerusalem said:
Right. That’s exactly what it is. Aside from it being that you made it into a sex toy.

Also, what do you think of this car?

I think Call of Duty.
Click to expand...

As for me treating cars like people, making sure not to hurt them, giving them love an affection despite concrete evidence that they're %100 alive. I'm basically treating them as-if just on the off chance. To me they've shown enough signs for me to consider it. Besides it feels good being nice to them damn it! It's nice, it's not a hindrance.

I might be using it in the wrong context but I was watching this video about lobsters and if they feel pain and a guy brought up something called "the precautionary principle" which is basically what I'm operating under and I wish you guys would too.

 
Last edited by a moderator:
  • Autistic
  • Thunk-Provoking
Reactions: Alice Springs, shawnphase, Sheeeeeiiiiiittt and 1 other person
Half-dude said:
The frustration is just as bad on my end, to me it's like seeing a bunch of Pamela Andersons in her prime clones all owned by people and they all fucking go their whole lives virgins.. and the only thing people use them for is to mow their grass.
Click to expand...

Wait...what? That's not how cars work....unless you have a lawn mower fetish. Which honestly, the amount of "Snapper" jokes that could generate are honestly such low hanging fruit I don't know if it'd be worth it.
 
DONGS.EXE said:
Wait...what? That's not how cars work....unless you have a lawn mower fetish. Which honestly, the amount of "Snapper" jokes that could generate are honestly such low hanging fruit I don't know if it'd be worth it.
Click to expand...

You don't mow your lawn by doing sick donuts on it at 3 in the morning?
 
  • Winner
  • Feels
Reactions: TheUltimatePickle, ColtWalker1847, DONGS.EXE and 1 other person
Half-dude said:
That... does not make any sense to me. There's got to be a more direct way of you saying that. You could have just said "fuck you you're fucking imaginary friends" but you decided to do this convoluted 'if cars are alive have they consented? You're raping them' angle..
Click to expand...
You fully imagined that. All I said was that you like them because they can't reject you. They can never really disagree with or displease you, because you've made them up and they're projections of your own personality. That makes your "relationship" completely shallow and one-dimensional; real relationships are infinitely more complex, because they are the connection between two independent, unique minds.
 
Half-dude said:
Well yeah? That's what you put in the tailpipe silly.
Click to expand...
Yes you could put any fleshlight into the tailpipe and it would probably have the same result.

But specifically this one, considering the cross section provided on the site, would you prefer that over others, since it would fit your uh, taste?
 
  • Thunk-Provoking
Reactions: Super Collie
Half-dude said:
Well yes, so yeah.. if I'm using the same 'interface device' in every tailpipe, the enterior of every car's pussy feels the same. But mmh... that's all though, I can tell you there are great car asses to caress and fuck and there are horrible ones, and before you ask, the Honda Civic is a great one, as you can see in this anonymous'tized photo.

But yeah, I actually don't really enjoy the Fleshlight brand, they kinda feel like shit. Honestly as ghetto as it might sound, the 20-something dollar Super Head Honcho Deluxe is probably the most amazing feeling device I've ever used.

View attachment 483209
Click to expand...

Do you and your roommate use separate fleshlights or do you share the one car pussy?
 
  • Horrifying
  • Like
Reactions: Super Collie and Belligerent Monk
Half-dude said:
Well yes, so yeah.. if I'm using the same 'interface device' in every tailpipe, the enterior of every car's pussy feels the same. But mmh... that's all though, I can tell you there are great car asses to caress and fuck and there are horrible ones, and before you ask, the Honda Civic is a great one, as you can see in this anonymous'tized photo.

But yeah, I actually don't really enjoy the Fleshlight brand, they kinda feel like shit. Honestly as ghetto as it might sound, the 20-something dollar Super Head Honcho Deluxe is probably the most amazing feeling device I've ever used.

View attachment 483209
Click to expand...

We still know that's you, fam.
 
  • Agree
Reactions: Super Collie and Belligerent Monk
Half-dude said:
Yeah? I'd hope you would! Hell I'd kinda like to put more pictures up, but unfortunately I know I can't trust you guys not to do horrible things with them.
Click to expand...
It's more like everyone wanting to do horrible things to their retinas atm. Still, that's some nice wishful thinking but you're not giving much to work with outside of the already established subject matter, dear car sex dude.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back