Artcow Half-dude / Ian Knau - Car Fucker

[Alice Springs]

So, Mr. Knau, I have to ask.

What's your take on tanks and APCs? Too butchy?

BMP butts have one heck of a double-D though.

 

[Half-dude]

Found a leggy car:
View attachment 494287

That is AWESOME dude lol.

 

[Uncle Warren]

Ya know the more I read this thread the more I start to notice that Ian's not here because he draws carfucking, I mean we all seen planetits right? It's more the fact that he keeps responding with the most frothing hatred towards everything that questions his weird fetish, as if it's our fault we don't understand why anyone would put their dick in a tailpipe.

 

[TenMilesWide]

Ya know the more I read this thread the more I start to notice that Ian's not here because he draws carfucking, I mean we all seen planetits right? It's more the fact that he keeps responding with the most frothing hatred towards everything that questions his weird fetish, as if it's our fault we don't understand why anyone would put their dick in a tailpipe.

nah he's here because he's a cool kid and this is the cool kids' club

 

[Echs Why Zed]

Hey @Half-dude, what you think of cars with whistle tips? Do cars making loud, high-pitched noises from the exhaust pipe turn you on?

Spoiler: Whistles go WOOOOOOOOOO

 

[jenffer a jay]

 

[Hideous K]

I have no words
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/24730148/#cid:122616782

Lol I always do love the accompanying dialogue in material like this lol not just you. You mentioned cringe, that's honestly the only cringy thing i find is the dialogue lol. <3

I do love car transformation, I've seen a couple and it's great. Lol just look at those subtle horrified expressions on their faces as they wait on the lot, screaming but no one notices.. I have a lot of pent up anger or frustration towards humanity for how so many people neglect their cars and treat them like trash. So it just tickles me in a sadistic way seeing two humans who'll now see what it's like.

I really should do a car transformation myself.

I actually had a 'movie' idea as silly as that sounds once. It's basically an idea where this slimey guy owns a used car lot and treats cars like crap. At the beginning act of the film it's shown that his lot is going out of business, and because he doesn't give a crap he plans to have the handful of cars on his lot taken to a scrap-yard. Well as it turns out one of the cars on his lot, a classic car, who hates humans with a passion and who also happens to know Occult magic, curses the guy. As the guy drives home that night his volkswagon breaks down, he kicks it and then walks off into the woods to find help. That's when he transforms into a car lol. When he comes back to his vw he, now being a car, can see she's alive and actually crying because he kicked her and she feels like crap. Ect Ect Ect.. basically the typical character arc story, the guy learns what it's like to be a car and learns to respect them so at the end when he's turned back to human he's the nicest guy to cars in the world lol. Anyway.. there's a little more to it then that but I don't wanna make a giant comment here.

 

[Half-dude]

View attachment 501758

Why did you turn a piece of shit into a car?

 

[Will you be my fwiend?]

This thread is officially dead as fuck, but I wanted to give people a chance to marvel at Semi-man's newest creation. I am waiting for the comic of this he is promising~
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/28251649/

Spoiler: Literal Nightmare

Your average sadistic guy or self-absorbed bug-phobic girl is walking through the park one day, smashing any insects that they lay their eyes on. The guy just for fun, or the girl because the bugs had the nerve to look gross to her.

However on this day, karma struck when mother nature decided to randomly shrink the fucker to the size of a mite, his or her teeny little self plopping down right on the wing of a giant hawk moth (now a gigantic hawk moth) who just so happened to have been grooming herself at the moment.

The moth's gigantic fat furry abdomen towered over his/her head as the realization of what just happened sinks in. The moth runs her paws through her fur, her claws squishing deeply into her doughy belly. After a moment, a quick glance over and the moth sees this little critter suddenly sitting on her wing and it causes her to yelp in surprise and fear.

The little boy/girl tries desperately to plead to the gigantic moth but ironically the human is so tiny their voice is reduced to unintelligible squeaking, useless sound even the moth was fortunate enough to know English.

Welcome to the bottom of the food chain little bug killer. </3

At least it isn't a car this time.

 

[CIA Nigger]

The first thing I noticed on his page was him REEEING about Patreon requiring him to hide his adult content.

https://archive.fo/kYn7i

 

[Will you be my fwiend?]

The first thing I noticed on his page was him REEEING about Patreon requiring him to hide his adult content.
View attachment 515264
https://archive.fo/kYn7i

Pornz
I love it when grown men still feel the need to spell things like they're 13 and lolsorandom. I've seen plenty of Patreons with publicly viewable NSFW, I'm guessing the flag reviewers just don't like thinking about their '87 Corolla raping them.

 

[Half-dude]

This thread is officially dead as fuck, but I wanted to give people a chance to marvel at Semi-man's newest creation. I am waiting for the comic of this he is promising~

Hey thanks for watching me on FA buddy. : 3 Yeah I love making things sexy that no one ever wanted to see sexy, part of the reason I draw porn of bugs.. with their tiny little bug-vaginas and boobs lol. I don't have a comic of that, but did you guys see my comic for Misty the Mosquito?

Page One: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/26436883/
Page Two: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/26466929/
Page Three: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/26488522/
Page Four: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/26508331/

Btw my Patreon is back up, and patrons can see the work in progress on the comic for the moth you mentioned. The bitch from Patreon did a second check of my account and said "well you fixed the offending problems so your patreon is back up" even though I didn't fix shit. So just as I thought, the reason they did it was bs.

 

[LofaSofa]

 

[Will you be my fwiend?]

Watch out for pot holes my friends. You never know when the mechiphiles will be there watching your car's ass bounce and enjoy it like twerking. <3

So, are all cars female, or are you just Bimechisexual?

 

[Meowthkip]

Is this vore?

 

[Will you be my fwiend?]

Is this vore?

I think it is, Other Barry, I think it is.

 

[Half-dude]

So, are all cars female, or are you just Bimechisexual?

Yeah I'm Bimechisexual. You'd think some of my art would give it away dumbass.

I think it is, Other Barry, I think it is.

 

[Tabtar]

Half-dude, you shouldn't go out of your way to look crazy to people . save yourself!

 

[ghuun]

Hey Half-Dude, can you rate my mom and i’s cars’ asses? I’m really curious.

My mom actually has a new car BC that mazda’s Engine broke down the other day so the car pictured is now dead, RIP

Her new car is a Toyota RAV4 2017 though

 

[Null]

Request to have a title changed
From: Yesa ludwig <leanorith@gmail.com>
To: legal@kiwifarms.net

So I’d like to have a title changed, specifically “Half-dude / Ian Knau- Car Fucker”. You may immediately dismiss this, however your own guidelines conflict with the title. In the "Forum Guidelines", one of your "rules" is "Topics titles should contain aliases", in which it states "Keep thread titles as brief as possible and use all their different usernames." I think this warrants a change, to Half-dude / Car Fucker as currently the title conflicts with your own rules, as it states their actual name, not username.


On Wed, Dec 5, 2018 at 2:23 PM Null <null@kiwifarms.net> wrote:
Nice try, but "Car Fucker" is in the sub-title, not the main title.


On 12/5/2018 9:25 PM, Yesa ludwig wrote:
Yes but Ian Knau is in the main title, and thus does not follow the alias rule you have


On Wed, Dec 5, 2018 at 2:27 PM Null <null@kiwifarms.net> wrote:
oh you're trying to be even more petty than I initially figured, you
want your name out of the title. lol. your real name is also an alias by
definition. rule lawyering my own fucking website.


On 12/5/2018 9:29 PM, Yesa ludwig wrote:
But is your real name your username? you know the thing you stated to post as the title in your own rules.


On Wed, Dec 5, 2018 at 3:48 PM Null <null@kiwifarms.net> wrote:
kill yourself


On 12/5/2018 11:14 PM, Yesa ludwig wrote:
Alright alright calm down I realize your ego is sensitive. I’m not trying to expose your ineptitude, just requesting a change to have a post be more fitting of your guidelines. Is there something wrong with that?


On Wed, Dec 5, 2018 at 4:17 PM Null <null@kiwifarms.net> wrote:
You're really winning yourself favors by acting like a smug
condescending faggot.


On 12/5/2018 11:19 PM, Yesa ludwig wrote:
So your not going to change a post to fit the rules you created?


On Wed, Dec 5, 2018 at 4:22 PM Null <null@kiwifarms.net> wrote:
The thread obliges the rules, you're being a smug autistic little shit about pedantic garbage no one except you cares about.

I now own ianknau.com and it forwards to the thread.