How are you doing? - Kiwi Farms Wellness Check

Everything's still shut down over here.
Won't be forever, maybe look into future stuff you wanna do, give yourself something to look forward to. or just message people you know, get some socialization dopamine
 
I've read every book I own. Ive seen everything worth watching on netflix. Im caught up on all my podcasts. I've been in isolation since early February. Now my state is lifting quarantine orders, but its too fucking hot and humid now, so im indoors anyway. Hello depression.

Im trying to buy a new car, but this sales person is the worst. I have to call him for status updates everyday. Usually once you are in a salespersons crm, they dont fuck off for a solid year. He is the worst.

I think I need a pet. Or a hobby.
 
Had to unsubscribe to a few YT channels today that I really liked because they felt the need to share their virtue signaling politics. Like, you're an ASMR channel, just tap on things and make clicking sounds and STFU

And there goes another one for me tonight.
A very small and fledgling channel that was never popular to begin with just came out of nowhere after not even uploading in 2 years or more "I SUPPORT BLACK LIVES MATTER"

Well, that made it quick and painless.
 
Currently thinking of making a list of companies to torrent from/never buy from again... Also feeling bored, lately. Haven't played many games, been careful on what developer/publisher I send my money to. Hell, even companies who normally never tweet about political nonsense have suprised me with shit like TPC sending 100k to NAACP. What the fuck.

Other than that... I have been doing fine, I guess. Not quite the greatest, could be worse though.
 
This week is poised to be stressful one but the way I deal with stress is to mentally check out of it so I'm feeling pretty aight.

I'm starting classes again tomorrow. I just want to be done with my degree already and doing a summer semester is going to be a lot in a little bit of time. I'm also having a surgery. It's not my first, but another in a series to fix a minor genetic mutation thing (wish I could have gotten the cool X-men kind but alas). It's been put off for months due to covid so it's about dang time.
 
Work today passed out a questionaire concerning racial sensitivity, and if a week-long course is necessary. The two immediate pros are, it would be paid time and lunch is provided. The results will be tallied by next weekend, but second shift co-workers are conflicted on how to vote. Most think our shift is fine; we have a lot of Hispanics and blacks, leaving me as one of three white girls.

The conflict is whether to dignify this nonsense or not, just so we can get easy money and free food. So, for the most part, I'm pretty happy others are not blinded by idiocy... unlike first shift, which has all the virtuous white women.
 
This week is poised to be stressful one but the way I deal with stress is to mentally check out of it so I'm feeling pretty aight.

I'm starting classes again tomorrow. I just want to be done with my degree already and doing a summer semester is going to be a lot in a little bit of time. I'm also having a surgery. It's not my first, but another in a series to fix a minor genetic mutation thing (wish I could have gotten the cool X-men kind but alas). It's been put off for months due to covid so it's about dang time.
Good luck with classes right now. Last summer I took five and got all A's, but I'm in danger of failing the single class I'm taking right now because it's impossible to focus or care what with the world burning and all.
 
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Just got away from my bf's fundie parents and have been chilling listening to podcasts. Also recently moved into a new apartment which is a pretty nice spot. Other than that I'm doing poorly and will be developing a new neurosis within the coming month.
 
Good luck with classes right now. Last summer I took five and got all A's, but I'm in danger of failing the single class I'm taking right now because it's impossible to focus or care what with the world burning and all.
Thanks. I'm so glad my university made a pass/fail option available because my depression was fucked from the switch to online classes and being forced to stay home with toxic family 24/7. I legit had the shittiest professor I've ever had this past semester. I'm starting to get better I think.
 
Thanks. I'm so glad my university made a pass/fail option available because my depression was fucked from the switch to online classes and being forced to stay home with toxic family 24/7. I legit had the shittiest professor I've ever had this past semester. I'm starting to get better I think.
I was going to use it for a couple of my CS electives I got B's in, but my parents goaded me into keeping the grades. Think I'll petition the university to change them back to pass/fail because it ruined my 4.0 CS major GPA.
 
By all accounts things are going alright and the world burning down doesn't bother me all that much either, but I am extremely lonely and haven't met anyone or really interacted with anyone IRL in the last three years. I was all ready to meet new people but then Corona hit and now everyone is in a 'tism typhoon with BLM and riots. Being an outsider used to never bother me much, but I feel it now more than ever.
 
I wouldn't say I am bummed out, but the fact that both my IRL life took a nosedive, ran into a wall and blew up while the Internet is filled with annoying stuff I can't even comment on is a hard one.

I can't say anything suprised me with the corona and black plauge, but meh. It's the same dull background noise. While I never expected the average guy to do anything, you could literally send B-52s and bomb them and they will still be passive. Wow, I am not even black pilled anymore, I just can't care.
 
Well, on the one hand, I will be home by the end of the month with almost 100 percent probability.

On the other, I'm so sick and tired of my current life, that I'm completely emotionally drained and have episodes of anger bursts again. I just hope, that after some rest and good sleep I'll be fine again, because that's embarrassing.

And there goes another one for me tonight.
A very small and fledgling channel that was never popular to begin with just came out of nowhere after not even uploading in 2 years or more "I SUPPORT BLACK LIVES MATTER"

Well, that made it quick and painless.

Happened to me yesterday too with one music creator. Not just one short message, but an entire picture (with black background, of course), full of triggers, impotent rage and accusations. Also, he deleted mash ups from his channels, because they had more views, than his original music. What a crybaby.
 
And there goes another one for me tonight.
A very small and fledgling channel that was never popular to begin with just came out of nowhere after not even uploading in 2 years or more "I SUPPORT BLACK LIVES MATTER"

Well, that made it quick and painless.

Happened to me again this morning. You can't name a video "relaxing whispers" then start talking about white guilt and the importance of the black literature you'll be reading during your social media break. I remember on The Dick Show a while back (I don't remember how long ago but I stopped listening to it around the end of last year) a woman called in and talked about the drama in the online knitting community because of Trump Derangement Syndrome and that's what this reminds me of. The video already had 500 dislikes so again, I'm comforted knowing I'm not the only person upset by this
 
Currently reside in SEA where the only new covid-19 case come from arrival passenger from foreign country.
I still can’t believe I feel safer in third world region like SEA of all place.
What a strange time we live in.
 
Happened to me again this morning. You can't name a video "relaxing whispers" then start talking about white guilt and the importance of the black literature you'll be reading during your social media break. I remember on The Dick Show a while back (I don't remember how long ago but I stopped listening to it around the end of last year) a woman called in and talked about the drama in the online knitting community because of Trump Derangement Syndrome and that's what this reminds me of. The video already had 500 dislikes so again, I'm comforted knowing I'm not the only person upset by this
What the fuck? Who the hell lectures people about white guild on an ASMR video?
 
Happened to me again this morning. You can't name a video "relaxing whispers" then start talking about white guilt and the importance of the black literature you'll be reading during your social media break. I remember on The Dick Show a while back (I don't remember how long ago but I stopped listening to it around the end of last year) a woman called in and talked about the drama in the online knitting community because of Trump Derangement Syndrome and that's what this reminds me of. The video already had 500 dislikes so again, I'm comforted knowing I'm not the only person upset by this

The funniest (or saddest) bit of what happened with me was some of the few comments were as superficial as it gets: "Want to be my friend?" Someone asked.

Wow, because those are the friends you want. Who will instantly throw you to the wolves if you disagree at all with ANY of their points, and who will instantly forget about you when this stops being relevant (Protip: It will).

And golly gee, what a way to start a friendship "So you like BLM? Me too!"
"Yeah, I guess."
"Cool!"
"Yeah."
"Okay"
"Yeah"

The pinnacle of friendship!1
 
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By all accounts things are going alright and the world burning down doesn't bother me all that much either, but I am extremely lonely and haven't met anyone or really interacted with anyone IRL in the last three years. I was all ready to meet new people but then Corona hit and now everyone is in a 'tism typhoon with BLM and riots. Being an outsider used to never bother me much, but I feel it now more than ever.

Trust me, you never know when you'll wind up meeting someone and things will turn around. Just keep moving forward and don't give up.
 
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