How is the kiwi above you in bed?

I almost thought you're a praying mantis, sorry.
Can't even try to lay with you, sorry.
 
He basically destroys pussies, ruining them and salting the earth afterward. You can't even pee correctly afterward, the whole bladder empties itself at once in a massive splashdown like the pig blood in Carrie.
 
  • Horrifying
Reactions: Mesh Gear Fox and Dude Vaccines
Has the most horrifying sex face that strangely made me cum so hard it launched me into a three year coma. Not to mention, the fucker shattered my pelvis and rendered me unable to feel anything below my lower lumbar. 666/10 will fuck again.

Really wish he would stop calling me Dick Cheney though...
 
  • Feels
Reactions: Mesh Gear Fox and Long Tongue Silver
Insists on wearing Timberlands during sex and has an autistic meltdown if his ballsack is touched in any way (He calls it his "below the bone-zone"). Surprisingly generous and adventurous lover, is known to scream "Burger King 2 for a dollar!" when reaching climax.
 
  • Informative
  • Like
Reactions: gabardineDelinquent and Mesh Gear Fox
Played Type O Negative while topping me, made sure to put some lube in me, went in slow and then so fast I'm still fucking numb and gave me the blanket when we cuddled after taking our post sex shower. 1000/10. literally the best top ((other than me))
 
  • Like
  • Feels
  • Winner
Reactions: Mesh Gear Fox, Firewater and C.U.N.T.
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back