Kevin Gibes / Kathryn Gibes / TransSalamander / RageTreb / The Green Salamander - "Am hole:" The epitomized Twitter MtF you thought was just a myth! Donate to his Transformers toy fund today!

[glass_houses]

I hope Penis’s grandparents call the producers of Hoarders after KevKev fills up the entire house with all that plastic shit.

“Apparently he had created one clear walkway that went from the bedroom to the kitchen. Everywhere else was overflowing with children’s toys as far as the eye could see.”

Oh, trust me, Penny will bury them like a dying alpaca the minute they start complaining. The man's a raging narcissist, narcs flip their shit whenever they hear the world 'no'.

 

[AMHOLIO]

Transformers, including an exchange with Brianna Wu

@Jaimas corral your cow, he keeps getting into all these other troon cow's fields. Tired of John Wu's pasty horseface ass coming into my goddamn threads.

preordering a total of EIGHT Transformers.

I must be old and unappreciative of the mecha genre because I really am having a hard time figuring out the difference between Optimus recolor #26 and #28. Seeing shows like Evangelion & Gurren Lagan I can distinguish most bots from the other easily, while transformers I can barely tell toys apart. This might have to due with the nature of reusing toy molds for manufacturing however, as there are transformers series that have more unique looking bots, but holy shit, most of his collection feels like the same robots copied and pasted 50 times, not including actual bot variations and special editions for popular characters.
I guess it is unfair to compare it to 1 season shows, so I'll go with another. Battletechs, another merchandise driven mecha, has enough differences between most of it's bots that I can tell what's what beyond recolors, and a lot have more part thought put into them so you can tell what they do at first glance. I'll give a shoutout to all the cool transformed forms of transformers, there's much more variation there.

What I'm trying to say is why collect so many visually indistinct things? I understand collecting a bunch of figures of one character, but 20 slightly different bots with only a few paint colors and pieces adjusted is pure visual slop.

I don’t know, I just remember events, time all blends together for me

If it helps I'm sure it does for Kevin too. Most of his life is scheduled around preorders, shipping, and trips he takes. He just stews in his own gravy for the rest of the year, which is a lot of stew time.

Oh, trust me, Penny will bury them like a dying alpaca the minute they start complaining. The man's a raging narcissist, narcs flip their shit whenever they hear the world 'no'.

I think Alpaca Autopsy Expert means when the troons move on or die. Phil's getting up there and his health keeps faltering, I could believe his folks might last just a bit longer than him.

 

[FinnSven]

Do MEN in their 20s normally go and see cartoon films at a movie theater if they don’t have children?

I am 100% certain the only time I went to see an age inappropriate film like this in my twenties was because a girlfriend wanted to see it.

I must be old and unappreciative of the mecha genre because I really am having a hard time figuring out the difference between Optimus recolor #26 and #28. Seeing shows like Evangelion & Gurren Lagan I can distinguish most bots from the other easily, while transformers I can barely tell toys apart. This might have to due with the nature of reusing toy molds for manufacturing however, as there are transformers series that have more unique looking bots, but holy shit, most of his collection feels like the same robots copied and pasted 50 times, not including actual bot variations and special editions for popular characters.
I guess it is unfair to compare it to 1 season shows, so I'll go with another. Battletechs, another merchandise driven mecha, has enough differences between most of it's bots that I can tell what's what beyond recolors, and a lot have more part thought put into them so you can tell what they do at first glance. I'll give a shoutout to all the cool transformed forms of transformers, there's much more variation there.

With all due respect, I am sure I would learn the difference between the various toys had I have an appropriately aged child who demanded said toys for Xmas and birthdays etc.

Otherwise, I don’t expect other humans to be particularly interested or clear on the various differences between toys, characters and other childish things.

 

[AMHOLIO]

With all due respect, I am sure I would learn the difference between the various toys had I have an appropriately aged child who demanded said toys for Xmas and birthdays etc.

I now know what Pokemon is like for those not into it.

 

[Soup Sammiches]

Do MEN in their 20s normally go and see cartoon films at a movie theater if they don’t have children?

I am 100% certain the only time I went to see an age inappropriate film like this in my twenties was because a girlfriend wanted to see it.



With all due respect, I am sure I would learn the difference between the various toys had I have an appropriately aged child who demanded said toys for Xmas and birthdays etc.

Otherwise, I don’t expect other humans to be particularly interested or clear on the various differences between toys, characters and other childish things.

I went to see Cool World in my 20's. It's technically a cartoon movie although I went because Kim Basinger.

 

[FinnSven]

I went to see Cool World in my 20's. It's technically a cartoon movie although I went because Kim Basinger.

I don’t simply mean animated films.
Plenty of animation is clearly not for kids.

However, gubbins like ratatouille is plainly primarily aimed at children. I know some of these films have subtle adult jokes inserted in to keep any parents watching from falling asleep, but that is not a reason to go see them.

 

[Soup Sammiches]

I don’t simply mean animated films.
Plenty of animation is clearly not for kids.

However, gubbins like ratatouille is plainly primarily aimed at children. I know some of these films have subtle adult jokes inserted in to keep any parents watching from falling asleep, but that is not a reason to go see them.

I hear you, that was my only basis for comparison and I agree adults should only be taking their kids to an actual kids cartoon.

 

[s0mbra]

I love how kevie just admits on full display laser hair removal isnt permanent.

Remember that every time a tranny says they get hair removal on their dick and balls before getting the dickflip.

 

[The Lawgiver]

I've noticed every time a new female character gets introduced to transformers he goes "OH EM GEE TRANS TRANSFORMER OH MY GOOOD!" That new transformer is clearly just a female robot in spiked armor based on the guys from the junk planet that was in the original transformers movie. I'm surprised the same claim wasn't made about Nemesis, that purple spaceship one, who's clearly a reference to the greek goddess of the same name.
By the way Nemesis is fucking $200.

I must be old and unappreciative of the mecha genre because I really am having a hard time figuring out the difference between Optimus recolor #26 and #28. Seeing shows like Evangelion & Gurren Lagan I can distinguish most bots from the other easily, while transformers I can barely tell toys apart. This might have to due with the nature of reusing toy molds for manufacturing however, as there are transformers series that have more unique looking bots, but holy shit, most of his collection feels like the same robots copied and pasted 50 times, not including actual bot variations and special editions for popular characters.
I guess it is unfair to compare it to 1 season shows, so I'll go with another. Battletechs, another merchandise driven mecha, has enough differences between most of it's bots that I can tell what's what beyond recolors, and a lot have more part thought put into them so you can tell what they do at first glance. I'll give a shoutout to all the cool transformed forms of transformers, there's much more variation there.

It's probably because he keeps buying every variant of the main cast. There are very VERY blatant differences between the different iterations of Transformers over the years, with clear differences in character designs save for the remolded ones.
Ironically there was a Gurren lagann reference transformers figure in the form of rumble from Transformers prime, though it's more blatant in the Japanese release. There was also the official EVA 01 optimus prime they made a few years ago, but that was more just a licensed recolor rather than a straight up reference.

 

[Jaimas]

You can't corral Wu. Wu simply is.

 

[Niggerphobe]

gi joe and transformers but cobra is just keffals liz and a few other infamous troons and the

 

[Humbert Humbert]

I'm gonna be real with you guys, I haven't read the shit posted here since that update earlier this week.

The fact Wu is in nearly every cow's tweets in the troonosphere is an accomplishment. It's like a seal of unquality on a trans profile.

Kevin is too, it's impressive quite honestly.

Could you imagine Kevin even thinking about dropping a kid off at school? Kevin would have heart palpitations being so near his trauma, he'd make Penny do it.

I actually laughed out loud at this, but don't worry, Kevin doesn't drive so it would be Penny doing the driving. Kevin is safe from his trauma.

My only worry is if he finds a young ftm he tries to make the moves on.

Well... We know how that ended last time he tried to do that a convention...

Kevie sure has been buying a lot of toys lately (or moreso than usual)!
Anyone have that tweet were he admitted to buying shit to cope or when he's upset?

September 2021 was wild, truly. I still think about and laugh at this post to this day.

Although to address the first statement, I think he's been buying at this rate ever since I started the updates, but I could certainly be wrong. It does seem like it comes in waves, sometimes he'll buy a ton of shit for a few days and then he'll buy less/not at all (or at least, posts about it less) for a few days.

What if the secret was that the teacher found your child was using KiwiFarms at school?

They wouldn't even keep it a secret, they'd probably try to have CPS called or expel the kid. I, on the other hand, would be angry with my child for not telling me, so we can shitpost together. Little Humbert needs to learn how to deliver content to his favorite threads, if he so wishes. Unless his KF usage was largely limited to the A&N board, in which case I would consider disowning him.

This man truly spends more money weekly on toys than I do on living, and I actually have a fucking job. It's baffling. I can't comprehend how he doesn't feel guilty for being so terminally wasteful

I was thinking about that, and honestly I'm not autistic enough to calculate how much money he spends on toys in each update. Writing them now is time consuming/autistic enough, and I've looked up some of the shit he buys and I get varying prices depending on where it's sold, so it would be more difficult to definitively say how much he spent on some things.

By the way Nemesis is fucking $200.

What the actual fuck lmao, why would anybody actually buy this shit and why would he buy it on top of several other transformers too???? Where the fuck is he getting this money from? He hardly begposts, at least on his main twitter (well, he payment info is linked in his pinned tweet, but that's about it). Something is not adding up here.

I love how kevie just admits on full display laser hair removal isnt permanent.

This is so disappointing to learn, and even more disappointing to learn from Kiwi Farms, of all places.

I now know what Pokemon is like for those not into it.

That's this entire damn thread for me. I have to look up a lot of references that he makes so I don't look like an absolute fool if I decide to describe what he says sometimes.

Oh, and since you guys were debating his height and I now know, I decided to run some analysis:


Yes, this is confirming what we already knew, and yes, I know that BMI isn't always accurate, but it's kind of funny.

 

[The Lawgiver]

Reply stuff is broken even for the hover select variant for some reason but @Humbert Humbert A surprising amount of people pay insane prices for transformers, especially in current year somehow . The ones that pay a lot generally go for one specific line though unless it's like a youtube reviewer in which case they're always buying and sometimes selling things on top of getting free shit from third party companies or sponsored hobby stores sometimes to review as a promo deal. They also usually have a little glass display case or specialized shelf display for their collection in like one room of their house. Kevin specifically has paid a LOT more than $200 on single transformers, as we have already seen. On top of feeding scalpers, he's got several $500+ ones, that big orange one, unicron was a one time $500 preorder from a few years ago people memed about because of how bullshit of a price it was. People still managed to get some, and now the only way to get it due to it being a one time only run are resellers that bought them to scalp them for over $1000 on ebay. there's been 2 other transformers like that in the last few years but they were much cheaper than unicron. Still $200 but fuck at least it's not half of a thousand. Most people treat their pricier figures with a bit more care, but there's infamous images of kevin throwing the expensive import ones around in a dirty ass bin.

 

[AirdropShitposts]

This man truly spends more money weekly on toys than I do on living, and I actually have a fucking job. It's baffling. I can't comprehend how he doesn't feel guilty for being so terminally wasteful

Maybe he's a communist because he wants someone to stop him from spending on luxuries rather than redistributing capital to socially necessary labor like basic amenities for the animals, dentistry for someone who can't chew, general upkeep of the commune, propane, knobs for the stove, etc.

 

[Humbert Humbert]

The site was having issues with images when I tried to post this last night. It's not very interesting, we have bits of his revision surgery talk but it's mostly him buying shit and talking about nerd culture shit. Oh, and yesterday I posted a bunch of photos and throwbacks to earlier events in the Tranch thread, if you're interested in some older Kevin photos.

On 4/8, he celebrated it being a month until his revision surgery. [A]

Still has a can of the Mario energy drink [A]

Some shit with Star Wars [A]

Opened a toy (there will be a lot of this in this update). [A]

MtG, first one he compares a couple alien races and says they're almost the same, and then he continues working on that deck of cards he was talking about in the last update I posted. I don't understand anything he's saying, except for the "I'm gay for Elesh Norn" part. [1], [2]

---

On Easter Sunday, 4/9, he didn't wish anybody a happy Easter (maybe in replies but I didn't check), opting to connue posting hsi toys. Here he organized his toy accessories, I guess he's just keeping all of them in the same container as the TMNT accessories (he posted about that the other day, iirc. But looking back at my updates, I think I might've missed it, either while writing the updates or in my look back at them, idk) [A]

Shifting back over to his MtG, he got a deck box for one of his decks of cards. [A]

Another look at the hoard unloading in the house, he's put all of his dinosaurs on one of the shelves. [A]

And then he opened more toys. [1], [2], [3]

More MtG, something about some dinosaur and lesbians or some shit idk [A]

---

Then on 4/10, he woke up excited for the revision surgery. [A]

Opening more shit, including a deck box for the Elesh Norn deck [1], [2], [3], [4]

Added spike things on the ends of his nose piercing [A]

I don’t know and don’t really care what this means [A]

More sexualization/inserting LGBT shit into MtG (somehow) [A]

Kevin publicly responds to somebody who called him a "degenerate" in the replies of his revision surgery tweet that morning. [A]

Before and after transition pics [A]

Continuing to unpack toys, he posted this when I was starting to collect the tweets for the update. [A]

And when I had finished collecting everything, I saw he posted this during that time. I'll collect the rest of the shit he posted after this point in the next update though (as I always do). [A]


Idk, I'm kinda starting to feel a little burnt out with the Kevin updates, as you can tell by my habit of not doing them for days and then making a post with all of the days I missed. He isn't really saying that much retarded shit, it's 95% him buying shit and discussing nerd culture (which I do not understand whatsoever). I don't think I'm going to stop doing the updates though, because at this point I'm on a roll, I documented most days of 2023 and this is actually the 56th "daily" update I've posted (yes I went through and am now keeping track)!

That being said, thread readers: do you prefer for me to not resize the images at all, or just insert the thumbnails and leave it be? I usually mobile post and resizing them is annoying, but I don't want to piss the people reading on desktop off when the screenshot is giant. I'm aware of how long these posts usually are, and I'm trying to see if people care about that if they're reading the posts and not just scrolling past.

Spoiler: Pics

I wrote the update on PC so I kinda had fun resizing the images, though im sure nobody looks at them lmao

 

[FinnSven]

Thank you for your efforts @Humbert Humbert

 

[scallion]

a little burnt out with the Kevin updates

Kevin is really only interesting when he's canoodling his horrific wounds (life-affirming surgeries), especially now that the Tranch is dead.
Also inserting thumbnails is fine, and you can post them side-by-side without a paragraph break to make them a bit more condensed. Just don't drop in full sized phone screenshots.

 

[KiwiFuzz]

Apparently the blue canary is a They Might Be Giants reference. I had to google.

https://tmbgshop.com/collections/accessories/products/blue-canary-night-light

Thanks for your updates, Humbert.

It's appreciated, except MY GOD the amount of money he must spend on plastic shit is demoralizing.

Powerlevel but I am a low-grade book hoarder and a bit of a completionist on some things, but I cannot fathom spending so much money every single day on things that are just going on the shelf never to be touched again until someone throws them in a landfill. Seems like genuine mental illness.

 

[Oxyjen]

Apparently the blue canary is a They Might Be Giants reference. I had to google.

I did not have to Google!
This reference means that Kevin is quite old.

 

[FinnSven]

Apparently the blue canary is a They Might Be Giants reference. I had to google.

https://tmbgshop.com/collections/accessories/products/blue-canary-night-light

Thanks for your updates, Humbert.

It's appreciated, except MY GOD the amount of money he must spend on plastic shit is demoralizing.

Powerlevel but I am a low-grade book hoarder and a bit of a completionist on some things, but I cannot fathom spending so much money every single day on things that are just going on the shelf never to be touched again until someone throws them in a landfill. Seems like genuine mental illness.

There is nothing wrong with book hoarding.

It means you have a literal library which can be passed on or enjoyed by children.

You may even have the opportunity to brighten someone’s memory if they find a book they have been looking for in your collection which is otherwise out of print.

Kevvie is the kind of fucker who would probably insist on being buried with his hoard so no one else could get it.

The archeological dig which finds that is going to have a lot of wild theories and speculation about our era.