Lolcow KingCobraJFS / Josh Saunders - Amateur musician, YouTube Streamer, wandmaker, and self-proclaimed "sexy goth badboy". Perpetually circling the drain.

[ADHD]

Those comments are enough to send her into a 15 minute long brain loop rage. Her skin is thinner than most actual lolcows and that's saying something.

I've been watching her for the last year, and she absolutely is a lolcow in her own right.

I honestly don’t know what it would take for him to break up with her. If the screaming fits don’t do it only reasons I can think of are are
1) a much nicer and more attractive girl comes along. He does not love NAL she is only a status symbol to the trolls and pussy to him.
2) NAL becomes too controlling and tries to run his shit. Josh does not like being mommy’d.

I don't know if you followed Chantal when she was involved with Nader, but long story short: Multiple claims of abuse and even filing false police charges for the purpose of wanting the police to remove the new woman from Nader's home wasn't enough for him to stop letting her come around for sex. And this is a man who had no trouble getting laid (because he was willing to fuck anything but that's not the point). Josh is able to mostly ignore Jessica's tantrums while she's home and only has to put up with her actual physical presence for a set amount of time when she visits. This might go on for a while.

 

[Incel Death Note]

The room shakes with a deafening explosion and a flash of green light.
Then nothing.
The glittered fog clears.
A dark scorchmark on the ground where Jessica was standing. Fleshy grey chunks and yellow liquid drip from the wall behind.
"I warned her. Didn't I warn her? I warned here not to be cute. I didn't want to ever use my powers like this, dood."
Pain is written all over Josh's face. Or is it pity? A beta male would have broken down crying, but only a single gothic tear escapes from Josh's eye. The apartment is silent save for a soft "..lucky there's a man who, positively can do, all the things that make us..." from the living room. Josh solemnly puts his wand back in his shirt pocket like it's a eulogy paper. His arms rest at his sides, fingers still tense, the survivor of a code duello on a lonesome western steppe. He sighs and reaches for his Potion Time glass.
"It is what it is, toobz."

 

[Ravier Xavenblood]

The room shakes with a deafening explosion and a flash of green light.
Then nothing.
The glittered fog clears.
A dark scorchmark on the ground where Jessica was standing. Fleshy grey chunks and yellow liquid drip from the wall behind.
"I warned her. Didn't I warn her? I warned here not to be cute. I didn't want to ever use my powers like this, dood."
Pain is written all over Josh's face. Or is it pity? A beta male would have broken down crying, but only a single gothic tear escapes from Josh's eye. The apartment is silent save for a soft "..lucky there's a man who, positively can do, all the things that make us..." from the living room. Josh solemnly puts his wand back in his shirt pocket like it's a eulogy paper. His arms rest at his sides, fingers still tense, the survivor of a code duello on a lonesome western steppe. He sighs and reaches for his Potion Time glass.
"It is what it is, toobz."
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After a few sips from his celebratory drink combo of Jack Daniels and Gfuel, he hears a knock at the door.
"IF IT'S PAID FOR, LEAVE IT AT THE DOOR. IF NOT, FUCK OFF! I'M SO SICK OF THESE TROLES, DOODT!"

 

[AnOminous]

She is an actual lolcow. The definition of one.

She's like a lolcow but without the actual being funny part. She's like an anti-cow. She even stops Josh from doing funny things with her unfunny chimping.

 

[Mister Baranavichy]

I've been watching her for the last year, and she absolutely is a lolcow in her own right.

Whatever she is, when all is sayed and done I've grown to enjoy this mini collab bettwen a cow of the main general and one from the beauty parlor, it was like a spinoff from the regular broadcast that brought two groups of viewers together to watch the travesty.

Although "was" is still a powerful word as I'm still on the fence if the boy will grow a spine, or if she'll pregnancy bait.

 

[Bixby Snyder]

How fucked is Josh’s life that Jessica is a fucking ‘status symbol’?

 

[Down From The Champions]

I think Jessica lives to fight with everyone and everything. Scanning every comment she receives on stream then only reacting to the trolls, badmouthing people in Walmart or the Airport. Just before her and Joshs first big fight you could actually she her look delighted that he gave her a reason to go nuts.

 

[Agamemnon Busmalis]

Whatever she is, when all is sayed and done I've grown to enjoy this mini collab bettwen a cow of the main general and one from the beauty parlor, it was like a spinoff from the regular broadcast that brought two groups of viewers together to watch the travesty.

It's kind of like a Lilith episode of Frasier.

Except with none of the humor, intelligence, or sick Niles/Martin iceburns that Lilith episodes had.

 

[ASeabear8952]

Whatever she is, when all is sayed and done I've grown to enjoy this mini collab bettwen a cow of the main general and one from the beauty parlor, it was like a spinoff from the regular broadcast that brought two groups of viewers together to watch the travesty.

Cobra’s magic brings people together. TMDWTFIU.

 

[Your Landlord]

Looks like the boy just uploaded five videos back-to-back. That has to mean she's gone, right?

 

[R00k]

Cobes just uploaded two videos. One of him and Jessica trying a dank food hack, and one of him and Jessica playing with a oujia board at the cemetery.

Sippin on genetic absinthe at the cemetery TWU.

 

[Hennimore]

Imagine going to the cemetery to pay respects to your parents and seeing two retards dressed like children and one bald asshole with a mustache playing with a board game amongst the tomb stones.

Takes all kinds.

 

[Catboy Ranch Dressing]

Homecuck Aaron coming in the closet nicely, toobz!

Getting sick of this faggot, too. I'd take Warlord or Samurai Scotty (RIP) over Methica and Aaron any day. At least Jessica's (seemingly) gone, hopefully the Aaron appearances stop when there's no bog breeding sessions to watch.

 

[Mr. Manchester]

I have sad news.

Cobra just uploaded a sick food hack with the hag in it.

and the first comment:

It is what it is toobz...

 

[Slim Boglim]

“My birthday sucked but I’m not gonna get into it for certain reasons till a more appropriate time. Circumstances are what they are. I don’t blame anybody except my YouTube trolls”

“Cake fell on the floor and made a huge mess. The mess got cleaned up but I didn’t get to really enjoy it and that’s like the least worst thing that happened on my birthday”

“I for one have never once complained about living here nor have I left a negative review and on top of that I’ve never complained about my neighbors no matter how loud they got…. I don’t want to get into it but the next 2-3 months are going to be interesting to say the least”

Okay so many of you all talked shit when I said he probably got an eviction notice on his birthday. Now what? You still gonna tell me that’s not what’s going on? Like come the fuck on what else could he be talking about? Like, yeah, I don’t know for sure but you don’t have to be Batman to use a little deductive reasoning to figure out what he’s taking about here guys

 

[Incel Death Note]

On his birthday cake: "When I took it out it got dropped on the floor and made a huge mess. That was like the least worst thing to happen on my birthday."
Is it just me or is that worded strangely? It "got dropped"? Did Jessica smash it on the floor and he doesn't want to tell his youtube troles?

 

[Catboy Ranch Dressing]

Cobra just uploaded a sick food hack with the hag in it.

He uploaded a batch of 5 videos, 2 of which we know for sure were filmed on his birthday. These are probably videos he's had saved and forgot to upload until now. But he did manually approve her comment, so he's seemingly still on good terms with the hag.

 

[Hennimore]

Okay so many of you all talked shit when I said he probably got an eviction notice on his birthday. Now what? You still gonna tell me that’s not what’s going on? Like come the fuck on what else could he be talking about? Like, yeah, I don’t know for sure but you don’t have to be Batman to use a little deductive reasoning to figure out what he’s taking about here guys

Hey man, I'm with you. At the very least he definitely got a stern talking to or was told he is on thin ice with the apartment complex. If he doesn't get kicked out I wonder if this is going to effect him inviting Jessica over again in the future. Josh is dumb but he obviously made the decision to not stream when she is around because of how risky is it for his channel so surely he would have to connect the dots and realize that having her over again could put his living situation at risk.

 

[biggacracka]

“My birthday sucked but I’m not gonna get into it for certain reasons till a more appropriate time. Circumstances are what they are. I don’t blame anybody except my YouTube trolls”

“Cake fell on the floor and made a huge mess. The mess got cleaned up but I didn’t get to really enjoy it and that’s like the least worst thing that happened on my birthday”

“I for one have never once complained about living here nor have I left a negative review and on top of that I’ve never complained about my neighbors no matter how loud they got…. I don’t want to get into it but the next 2-3 months are going to be interesting to say the least”

Okay so many of you all talked shit when I said he probably got an eviction notice on his birthday. Now what? You still gonna tell me that’s not what’s going on? Like come the fuck on what else could he be talking about? Like, yeah, I don’t know for sure but you don’t have to be Batman to use a little deductive reasoning to figure out what he’s taking about here guys

I agree but maybe not a full blown eviction notice, at least I think he got told the next strike is eviction, what with the "next 2-3 months". To me it sounds like Clint spoke to the landlord and arranged a deal, like "if my BOY can behave for the next few months, please let him stay" or something like that, but clearly the roof over his head is in jeopardy.
If even the boglim can understand as much, I can't understand how people disagree with you.

 

[Incel Death Note]

Jessica the camgirl tradwife