I remember everybody was talking about how he was just lying and didn’t really do it. Well; what do you have to say now?
I have a running list of general shit that I think will happen in Josh’s life. Josh has a boring life, by and large, but occasionally something ridiculous can occur and it gets even more ridiculous by how Josh handles the situation.
1. Josh will get hair implants and learn online that most of that hair comes from his ass. He will have an obsession with calling himself a “Doodyhead” for 5 months until the trolls start calling him KingDoodyHeadIBS, which feeds into his fart fetish and we get another half year of fart videos to own the trolls. This fizzles out quickly.
2. Josh goes to England and makes some of the best outside videos we’ve seen in a decade by continuously approaching people with his holographic snake sunglasses and impersonating Ozzy.
3. Josh shits his pants and the trolls spend the next 3 months sending him Depends.
4. Josh actually gets his license to drive after Clint pesters him for a year and basically spoon feeds him the opportunity. He buys him a relatively new Honda Accord. Josh spray paints it green, documenting the whole process, and duct tapes his broken cane Snake head to the hood. He tried to pass it off as a “Pimp My Car” knock off by calling it something completely bland like “Cobra’s Cars” and it’s actually just not that great.
5. Josh actually lights the trailer on fire doing sick bong rips and his dad bans smoking in the trailer.
Those are some pretty ridiculous predictions because Cobra is, hands down, the most boring cow on this site but I would’ve never predicted Warlord Campbell trooning out. The suicide counter starts now, I don’t wanna say “Man, when Alex dies that’s gunna be a great stream” because that’s a little fucked up but that’s basically what I’m saying, homie.
