Lolcow KingCobraJFS / Josh Saunders - Amateur musician, YouTube Streamer, wandmaker, and self-proclaimed "sexy goth badboy". Perpetually circling the drain.

[SP:OP]

Just don't "get involved". We're having an awfully bad A-Logging issue as of late and I just know some over enthusiastic faggots are going to fling wrenches into the whole thing right as some legendary shit happens.

Yeah like one of his mods driving 20 hours to buy him a burrito and dropping off money lol. They can’t help themselves and will come up with 1000 different excuses as to why it was okay when they did it, or just lie and pretend they were just “passing through Casper and happened to run into josh by chance”

 

[kisskiss mukbang]

i've been updating myself on this fella weekly for a fair while now (kate winslet's fault) and he really has gone downhill fast, hasn't he?
i agree with what someone said upthread about him being essentially harmless, which is a rare thing to be said of a true lolcow. knowing he has a gun the only person at risk is him, or maybe if someone literally runs in the room while he is blasting off a few room destroying shots.

what's the likelihood of him actually getting help *if* he chooses to ask for it? are there resources available for him to get treatment for the alcohol thing (i'm ignoring the rest as it's the alcohol that's threatening his life right now)

 

[beeingurself]

All he had to do was drink in moderation, make his shitty sticks, collect money from weens and he'd be perfectly okay for someone on SSI.

I think I've posted this before in here (or maybe I did in his subreddit), but...yeah.

All considered if he had a decent head on his shoulders he could have a somewhat spartan, but otherwise comfy life. Selling painted sticks and merch (which the fans/trolls would even help him design, if he fucking asked) would pay for basic expenses, him having SSI would help and donations would give him some extra cash to save and/or buy some new toys.
Maybe he could even find some small part-time job somewhere trolls wouldn't find him.
The problem is he doesn't have a brain, at least not one that functions at least at 50%.
Despite being always broke he mindlessly spends $50-$60 on fast food and God knows how much on booze.
He is unable to keep his accounts (bank and paypal) with a positive balance, every single cent that he has just has to vanish immediately, lest the money start to accumulate dust or something. And then he doesn't keep track of how much he spends and ends up overdrafting, also he never accounts for possible chargebacks on paypal which trolls commonly do.

It frustrates me because I've been a miserable fuck with no luck and a feeling of having no future, I know how nice it would have felt if someone had given me a hand at the time.
But Josh has people trying to help him over and over again and he simply isn't able (literally, his brain just can't do it) to take advantage of the chances he has. He doesn't even aknowledge that people try to help him.

TL;DR: if Cobes wasn't a complete shitshow of a person, he would lead a simple but decent life. But he's a complete retard with very little or nothing in the way of redeeming qualities.

 

[Dick Pooman]

I'm now pretty sure it was the hat

I've updated the featured post to reflect this new information. That hat really has been a curse.

 

[Clint's Burden]

Is it a guarantee that he will get his store back if he ships out the Wands? What if they just want a refund, or do they have to accept the wands no matter how late they’re sent out? Also, can they just continue to say they never got them?

Maybe. Depends on whether the customer wants to resolve it that way, Josh seems to think that’s the case but I’m fairly sure it’s because he doesn’t want to pay a fuckload of money. I can’t blame him, whipping up a couple of coloured shit-sticks seems easier than shelling out $200+ dollars. Maybe if he didn’t price them at ridiculous amounts, this shit wouldn’t happen. Like he said, “Nobody is going to feel bad for me because…like….I do this to myself.”

Depends. You have to sign off on FedEx packages and show photo ID when you pick them up, so there’s proof you received it. If you wanted, I suppose you could say someone intercepted the package on delivery or home drop off, you never got it and you’d prefer cash instead. Maybe you could do this once or twice but not infinitely, small package carriers have contingencies for things like this.

 

[beeingurself]

what's the likelihood of him actually getting help *if* he chooses to ask for it?

Despite all his faults, Clint would help him however possible.
Problem is that Josh has a lot more mental problems than he gives himself credit for, one of which is how contrarian and violent he is.
You tell him "dress like a normal person" he throws a violent tantrum and dresses like a hobo.
You tell him he has to moderate his drinking (and not drink on camera) and get off youtube for some time (since it's clearly affecting him mentally) and 2 days later he's doing a livestream passing out on his chair.
So him choosing to ask for help is a big "if", nearly impossible given his attitude towards the problem.

 

[Q_Anon1001]

Oh jesus, I haven't watched any Cobra content in quite a while so his appearance really shocked me. Wtf happened to his hair? And is that his magic wand that sticks out of his breast pocket, with the green end on it?

He has tricherteria, a compulsive disorder that makes him pick at his hair compulsively. Don't worry he got it treated and he's going to grow a full set of hair

 

[DuckSucker]

View attachment 2567096
Ok here's a cut of Josh tripping on his gothic throne worn out prospector hat. Probably the funniest yet saddest thing I have ever seen.

Dude just hold the cigarette by the part where it broke until the cherry gets close then break it off and light it again this is like 101 shit usually it breaks by the filter anyway

 

[Dick Pooman]

Josh's stream from this morning. He said that someone called in a wellness check last night and police and an EMT showed up at his house. Josh says that he's going to take a few days off from streaming. Usually, when he says he's taking a break it's because someone scolded him for making an ass of himself and he's usually back streaming after one day.

Spoiler: Archive: chillin (9/25/2021)

 

[PuffyGroundCloud]

Just don't "get involved". We're having an awfully bad A-Logging issue as of late and I just know some over enthusiastic faggots are going to fling wrenches into the whole thing right as some legendary shit happens.

After Chris and Chantal fiasco, it’s not worth it to ween

 

[Clint's Burden]

what's the likelihood of him actually getting help *if* he chooses to ask for it? are there resources available for him to get treatment for the alcohol thing (i'm ignoring the rest as it's the alcohol that's threatening his life right now)

He would never ask for help to begin with, but assuming a literal miracle occurred and he did, the next question you’d want to ask is “Would he accept the kind of help he needs?” He just wouldn’t, it would require work and a level of willpower he’s not capable of understanding. He would have to suffer responsibility in the present to provide him some freedom for the future and he just can’t do that.

As an example, look at his lifestyle. Anything that provides immediate gratification is the only thing he chases. Booze, energy drinks, weed, his smokes, porn, the list goes on and on. Nothing he pursues requires some dedication or time.
When it comes to his art, which you’d think would require dedication and time, he cuts as many corners as humanly possible. He doesn’t invest time into learning new things, using new software, buying new microphones, hell he’s been sent new microphones and instead of taking the time to set them up properly he just discards them shortly after unless it plugs and plays. Instead of making things, he will just steal things and place his shit on top of it. Every album cover, tons of songs, every piece of merch, it’s all like that. Whenever he does any of this, it’s not a passion dedicated to art that drives him to finish things quickly. It’s a passion for getting a paycheck quickly, which will get him hammered quickly.

He cannot help himself and nobody can help him. His frame of reference for what “help” is is a passion for hedonistic pursuits and attempting to cut corners anywhere he can. They have their place and time but not for Josh, every day is their place and time.

 

[chimpSculpture]

For all his faults, Clint would help him however possible.

I don't see how anyone thinks a Clintervention would actually help. Maybe in the short-term Cobes would do the bare minimum and not make a complete fool of himself and his family. But what are people expecting his father to do? Ground him?

Cobes obviously doesn't act his age but just because he acts like a toddler it doesn't mean his dad should treat him like one. The only reason his father pays his rent is because otherwise, Cobes would have to live with him. Shitting up the place. Twenty or so years of that must've been enough!

 

[Q_Anon1001]

A couple of spare points for the new comers.

1. A subset of KingCobrasJSF subreddit believes he should be placed in a home and have discussed this at length. Cobes has been told this and he spergs out saying that if this ever happens, he's going to have to be dragged out of his apartment and he will just raise hell in the group home.

2. He lives in the second story of a low income housing apartment. Last night's little music fest and temper tantrum that resulted on him falling and shaking the floor was most likely heard by his neighbors who in the past have knocked at his door to complain of his behavior at least twice that we know of. Last night could have been the final straw and they called the police. Since cobes has been swatted before, the cops most likely sent the paramedics. Not everything is a zoomer troll trying to tap the glass.

 

[beeingurself]

I don't see how anyone thinks a Clintervention would actually help.

Well, in the scenario of Josh accepting the help he needs (in a parallel universe, where Josh isn't Josh), it wouldn't be a matter of Clint phoning him and arguing.
It would be more of a matter of Alcoholics Anonymous, medication for his mental problems and perhaps a group home.
Which let's be honest, Josh couldn't manage to do by himself, Clint would have to help even if just financially.
I'm just saying I don't doubt Clint would help Josh if Josh somehow was willing to get the help he needs (which he isn't and won't ever be, because solving the kind of problems he has isn't done overnight).

 

[General Tug Boat]

I haven't heard from Kobra in such a long time, but I will have to say that is an legendary clip. Though I am going to have to say that he does look like shit. Booze is a bad mix for a guy like Kobra, hopefully he can get some sense, and slow down a bit. Though watching that clip made my day.

 

[Bland Crumbs]

Kind of looked like his mouth was a little bloody there. I remember watching someone stream about him and he seemed kind of strange this is just pathetic.

He does not live with his mom right?

 

[mars]

Kind of looked like his mouth was a little bloody there. I remember watching someone stream about him and he seemed kind of strange this is just pathetic.

He does not live with his mom right?

He lives alone in a shitty apartment that's mostly payed for by SSI. Which makes this outburst even more outrageous considering he has neighbors.

 

[ShiningBrightly]

View attachment 2567096
Ok here's a cut of Josh tripping on his gothic throne worn out prospector hat. Probably the funniest yet saddest thing I have ever seen.

this is the funniest fuckin shit i ever seen

 

[Fools Idol]

It's not the first time he trips on some shit he has off-camera on the floor. Dunno if it's a rug, his shoes or whatever, but when he's drunk sometimes he trips on it. Or maybe it's just his balance going off due to him being drunk.

Depending on how plastered his was it could've been thin air.

 

[9/11 Airlines]

View attachment 2567096
Ok here's a cut of Josh tripping on his gothic throne worn out prospector hat. Probably the funniest yet saddest thing I have ever seen.

At first I was like "Really? Some dude falling down gets featured?" Then I heard "FFUUUUUUUCCCCKKKK" and have been rolling ever since. That is some grade A farm fresh milk right there.