Lolcow KingCobraJFS / Josh Saunders - Amateur musician, YouTube Streamer, wandmaker, and self-proclaimed "sexy goth badboy". Perpetually circling the drain.

[Glowie]

On tenth of Christmas my internet gave to me ten cans of vomit

 

[Baroque]

That was a good fall, he really went down.

 

[Consider Lizärds]

Stream archive doods TMDWU

"Chillin" on Archive.org, just in case.

 

[Captain Ahab]

If that’s him before Christmas, then next Valentine’s Day is gonna be apocalyptic.

 

[Phalanges Mycologist]

If that’s him before Christmas, then next Valentine’s Day is gonna be apocalyptic.

Oddly Christmas seems to have more of an effect on him (and a lot of other Alcoholics) than Valentines day, this is a time of year where friends and family come together to have fun but if your like Josh that doesn't happen you might get a card or a call etc but when nobody wants to spend time with you, come around to your place or be invited around to there place it hurts especially when it's close family more than being single on a Halmark Holiday.

If you look at Josh's history the more he's became isolated from friends at first an then family each year Christmas or around Christmas has always been a low point for him, he wasn't invited to the main event last year just something after and got so fucking drunk he got arrested, no "Friends" want to see him at his place or invite him around to there's - he's isolated and he knows it and the one time of the year people are supposed to be happy he's not he's sitting in a pokey little flat, stewing in cheep booze and his own juices and get's more drunk than normal.

 

[G.Rapefruit]

View attachment 5554658

Puff was on that stuff…he was running his mouth about the whole operation. He was jeopardizing everything we worked for. I did that shit for you Avon…cause you couldn’t.

The killer was brought in from out of town. Stringer-Saunders ordered the hit so Cobe-von would have plausible deniability. Puff had been loose lipped about the mead operation and it was only a matter of time. It looked like a suicide…puff put the belt around his neck hooked it the doorknob and just…sat down.

 

[Bogliacci]

What still amazes me is how early it all went down it ended like 7 or 8 Casper time????

 

[Agamemnon Busmalis]

I can't believe I missed a legendary moment in cobraverse history. Fuck my of age, alive, consenting, and non related wife for forcing me to go to dinner with her parents.

I'M SICK OF IT!

You should have drunk an entire fifth of Pinnacle cake vodka with A&W cream soda an hour before the dinner.

 

[bathtubcosby]

It started out as just another boring low energy e-begging stream

Then that four pack of sam Adam's got delivered and our boy lit up like a Christmas tree. True alcoholic behavior. One drink turns into a complete shit show.

 

[Orkeosaurus]

Something tells me this wouldn't have gone down the same way if Homeboy Ian still lived there. He'd either get a pop in the mouth Warlord style or bum enough of that whiskey this wouldn't have been such a shitshow.

 

[Cheeseknife]

View attachment 5553861

You know who also loved to drink Steel Reserve?

Lowtax.

 

[Phalanges Mycologist]

Then that four pack of sam Adam's got delivered and our boy lit up like a Christmas tree. True alcoholic behavior. One drink turns into a complete shit show.

Christmas before I got sober - I was starting to enter my really dark phase of drinking - I was a day or so before Christmas in a shop an found these off brand Lequure chocolates that had 15% alcohol in them and was happier than a pig in shit, and I had money I really did have money back then but this was "Booze that I could keep hidden" so bought 20 box's and took a few with me to family events where I felt I couldnt drink or drink as much as I wanted and thought it was smart - it wasnt an everyone knew what I was upto but left me alone and at that miserable point in my life that's what I wanted.

I can see josh doing something like that, but not doing it and saying fuck it an downing booze before a even an getting disinvited the second his ride shows up.

 

[Po's Cootah]

This would be an excellent anti-alcohol PSA.

 

[The Blue Morpho]

We got to see a real, genuine Josh hot-mic sperg-out. What an incredible treat. Confirms what many already knew to be true, he still rages but just keeps it off camera. The way he started flailing around before falling asleep again was cartoonish. And that hard fall is almost made funnier by the stupid angle, although I would have loved to get a better view of it.

There is no neghole pozzing that will make this situation better since this goober tells everyone who tries to help to fuck off. I don’t know a single person who’s had more people, in such a long period of time, try to genuinely help him even in the smallest of ways more than Cobra. He’s had every opportunity extended to him in multiple ways and he’s either fucked it up completely all on his own or he’s flat out ignored it because he thinks he’s above it. There’s no reason to have some kind of weird hate for the guy, he’s a video on your screen whatever harm he causes is entirely to himself and what few entities exist in his immediate life but you can’t feel bad for him, he put himself here and it’s the way he wants it and likes it. If he didn’t like it he could, at minimum, make one phone call and his dad would bail him out immediately. He’s just a dude rolling around in his own shit, getting mad whenever a kernel of corn strikes his eye.

Pretty much where I'm at, this is how he chooses to exist and nobody who has the power to do anything about it is willing to. I'm even at the point now where I don't think sending him alcohol is a big deal, probably safer than his botulism pruno and definitely better than duster.

and redditfags wanted to take this from us because Josh says slurs has brain dead opinions on israel (no shit he doesn't know how to take care of himself let alone geo-politics)

What is Josh's retard take on Israel? All I remember was him saying fuck Hamas which isn't retarded but would trigger reddit NPCs.

That last glass getting spilled saved his life. I'm convinced of that. He would've drank an entire bottle of Jack in under 3 hours. He'd be getting his stomach pumped in the ER. And the ungrateful little shitstain just yells and screams

Dude's an alcoholic, his tolerance is such that I don't think he'd have died. He might have slept through the knocking, though, and the night might have gone very differently had he not spilled all that hooch. Might have been far less hilarious.

If you look at Josh's history the more he's became isolated from friends at first an then family each year Christmas or around Christmas has always been a low point for him, he wasn't invited to the main event last year just something after and got so fucking drunk he got arrested, no "Friends" want to see him at his place or invite him around to there's - he's isolated and he knows it and the one time of the year people are supposed to be happy he's not he's sitting in a pokey little flat, stewing in cheep booze and his own juices and get's more drunk than normal.

I think you're right, I think Christmas is going to be a disaster this year. HOPEFULLY faggots don't strike his channel any more and deny us this milk.

 

[Blue Miaplacidus]

welp he said faggot too many times, incoming reddit flaggotry.

 

['Ole Dente]

It’s funny, this could’ve been avoided entirely if he actually cut back on his drinking but he can’t do it. This boy needs group sessions until he smartens the fuck up, permanent group sessions. Here’s what you do Clint, you say “Son it’s time for AA, okay? I know you don’t wanna go, man! I know, but you’ve got a problem and you need to get better. The cops just got a hold of me and said it was a condition of your release from jail that they forgot to add to the docket. So you gotta go or it’s back to jail, the judge is being nice enough to let us off with a warning.”

You’re a dad mr nipps it’s time to start lying and making up shit to cajole your toddler into improving their own life like the rest of us

edit: fresh meat throwing dumb at me like they have opinions that matter, get a little more mileage reddit bums and we’ll see

 

[Lake Cresva Diver]

This would be an excellent anti-alcohol PSA.

jorb is excellent anti-everything he does psa.

 

[Spunt]

It’s funny, this could’ve been avoided entirely if he actually cut back on his drinking but he can’t do it. This boy needs group sessions until he smartens the fuck up, permanent group sessions. Here’s what you do Clint, you say “Son it’s time for AA, okay? I know you don’t wanna go, man! I know, but you’ve got a problem and you need to get better. The cops just got a hold of me and said it was a condition of your release from jail that they forgot to add to the docket. So you gotta go or it’s back to jail, the judge is being nice enough to let us off with a warning.”

You’re a dad mr nipps it’s time to start lying and making up shit to cajole your toddler into improving their own life like the rest of us

That's 4 entire complete sentences. That's about 4 more than Cobes can understand. And after not understanding any of that, he'll respond with "Get fucked trole, I do what I want!"

Everyone needs to stop acting as if Cobes is capable of logical thought. He always struggled with it, and that was before he bathed his smooth-ass thinkin' meats with a triple threat of booze, kratom and duster. Fuck, I don't know what doing all three of those at the same time will do to you. Maybe it will give you superpowers, if you count the ability to teleport to the ER as a superpower.

I think we're nearing the end of the saga now. There's a good chance that by next year he'll be in a box, or will have done so much damage to his brain that he does actually end up in a home, because one big seizure or stroke could incapacitate him completely. I don't think this story will have a happy ending, but it is what it is, toobz.

 

['Ole Dente]

That's 4 entire complete sentences. That's about 4 more than Cobes can understand. And after not understanding any of that, he'll respond with "Get fucked trole, I do what I want!"

I’ve heard him speak with his father plenty of times he’s entirely capable of taking in multiple sentences and understanding what they mean. He’s not that retarded.

 

[Spunt]

I’ve heard him speak with his father plenty of times he’s entirely capable of taking in multiple sentences and understanding what they mean. He’s not that retarded.

How recently, though? He's started having absence seizures. He's now in the terminal alcoholic cycle of day-drinking. Have you ever met an alcoholic at this stage? Either way, you're going to learn how hopeless it is from this stage, and most alcoholics don't triple-down their brain damage with kratom and duster.

He didn't listen when he got fired. He didn't listen when his girlfriend dumped him. He didn't listen when he got evicted. He didn't listen when Clint pulled out of his birthday dinner. He didn't listen when he went to jail. He didn't listen when his teeth turned into loose gravel. He didn't listen when all his friends bailed. And he had his shit together way better when those things happened. What makes you think he'd listen now?