Lolcow KingCobraJFS / Josh Saunders - Amateur musician, YouTube Streamer, wandmaker, and self-proclaimed "sexy goth badboy". Perpetually circling the drain.

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Sicko Hunter said:
After Josh was kicked out of Job Corp for smoking weed Clint seriously considered putting him in one but he was able to beg him and promise he would get a job and move out both of which he did so it didn't happen.
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Like any addict, he can manipulate when necessary. He was a lot more coherent back then, so it was easier for him to do it then compared to now.
 
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IsaacShraeder said:
At 9:45:

Sounds like Cobes is consooming that Boomercon cartoon the Daily Wire picked up. Very soon he'll be dropping rants about how Israel is our greatest ally, doodt.
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Fuck, the acoustics in that room are awful. I miss the old set up so much. I'll never forgive reddit faggots for getting Cobes evicted.
 
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Can someone explain the censored / bleeped comments in the Vegan Teacher video?

I really love how he still rants about this lady years later lol
 
Al Dente Alighieri said:
If you're a junkie there are consequences for being a junkie.

You smash your phone? No phone.
You get evicted? No house.
You have no job? No money, no booze, no food.
You alienate your parents with homicidal drunken rage? No family.
You look like a hollowed out Asian dog man from abusing your body for 20+ years? No pussy.

I'm sure most of you can think of more but there are a lot of natural consequences for being a piece of shit junkie and beyond a diminished intelligence and a couple of burnt bridges, Cobra suffers none of them. It makes them very, very angry that they can't be pieces of shit and do the same, a lot of these people seethe unendingly about it.
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Maybe Cobes was right, but not in a way his boglim brain could comprehend. They're jealous that he managed to live their dream lifestyle without ending up on the street with literally no one in his life. So they want to "punish" him by forcing him to end up like that. It all makes sense now.
Sicko Hunter said:
I really do think people need routines and need schedules in their day to day life to stay mentally healthy. Something to get up for and some goal to work towards. There is a reason why people retire and then just lose all purpose and die. With Cobes like you said I don't think he's even intelligent enough to be bothered by it.
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I disagree. It happens rarely, but sometimes he has rare moments of clarity where he realizes how absolutely shit and hopeless his life has become. This usually comes out during his nuclear meltdowns, like when he just said "I'm a fucking loser!". Or that one meltdown over doordash where he passed out but woke up and just screamed in agony for a few seconds. The camera caught the delusions melting away, even if it was just for a short moment.

It's like what happens when a Chaos space marine gets cut off from the Warp in 40k. Sometimes he realizes what a disgusting abomination he's become and screams in agony.
Sicko Hunter said:
I don't think it crosses his mind he's wasted the best years of his life getting drunk alone in a dingy studio apartment. He's not really capable of comprehending that.
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Josh's early to late 20's weren't that bad, at least by current Cobraverse standards. Sure most of his friends were degenerate weirdos, but he hung out with people regularly, went outside a bunch and even got laid to women who were slightly more tolerable than Jessica. It all fell apart after the first eviction. After that he lost the spark. His cobra demon powers started to fade and that's how we ended up with shutin Cobra who just watches ragebait all day alone.
Sicko Hunter said:
I spent ages 18-20 basically completely dropped out of society. I wasn't a raging drunk or anything like Cobes but I was a full on NEET and it was some of the most depressing years of my life. You have no reason to get up, nothing to look forward to, no future. I would never go back. It's so bleak. Like you've already died.
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I spent the entire first half of my 20's either on the fringes of society as a shutin working shit jobs/going to school and not really trying in life and that was also the low point in my life. But the really low points were my bouts of NEETdom. Even with money, the constant worry of said money running out and your friends moving on and abandoning you weighs down on you. Not even booze, weed and video games can make that existential dread go away after awhile.
 
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Umaibae said:
Can someone explain the censored / bleeped comments in the Vegan Teacher video?

I really love how he still rants about this lady years later lol
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The censored part was essentially like:
“The baby loves the taste of the rib because of the barbecue sauce. It would still have the same reaction if it were a penis.” Then she just tells people to “internalize” it and “think about it deeply.” It’s definitely sicko behavior. This video gives the uncensored part:
 
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JambledUpWords said:
The censored part was essentially like:
“The baby loves the taste of the rib because of the barbecue sauce. It would still have the same reaction if it were a penis.” Then she just tells people to “internalize” it and “think about it deeply.” It’s definitely sicko behavior. This video gives the uncensored part:
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Cobes went easy on her if anything, this fucking freak deserves a terrible fate.
 
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Slim Boglim said:
That’s crazy man you’re 100% right. I can’t believe nobody’s thought of that yet why doesn’t Clint put him in a group home? Is it because he’s a bad father? 🤔
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Lets talk about group homes for another 10 pages fuck yea

Screenshot 2024-06-12 184529.png
 
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Slim Boglim said:
That’s crazy man you’re 100% right. I can’t believe nobody’s thought of that yet why doesn’t Clint put him in a group home? Is it because he’s a bad father? 🤔
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It'd be hard to get Cobra on board since I don't think group homes let you bring in outside food, such as a large stuffed crust pizza from Papa John's with extra cheese, extra bacon, onions, jalapenos and anchovies.
 
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anliteralidiot said:
What if, instead of a group home, we had a nursing home for old lolcows? And instead of letting anyone join, you pick specific people, like Cobes, and take care of them while they continue to be funny online?
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Nursing home, but Cobes is the head chef at said nursing home
 
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The main obstacles are
1. Cobes would never voluntarily go into into a group home and you can’t be forced into one without some legal precedent. He went so far as to threaten suicide if he was ever forced into one

2. The group home would have to be willing to accept him

3. Cobes wouldn’t actually kill himself (fuck suicide) but he would probably sabotage any efforts to help him and behave terribly with the express purpose of getting kicked out by making it not worth the effort to put up with him

4. On the off chance he did get accepted in one and was willing to go they would be very quickly inundated with weenery and a-log harassment and he’d be asked to leave in the hopes it’d put a stop to it

5. KFC took away the double down. I’m not mad at KFC and I still fuck with them but it sucks that they took it away. Now, I’m still gonna eat at KFC but they took away the double down and it’s kind of bullshit just sayin’. Usually when I go to KFC I get 6 extra crispy drumsticks. Large gravy. But this time I was gonna get a double down but they took it away. It is what it is I’m not mad to be quite honest I’m just saying it sucks that they took away the double down. They added it on the menu for a limited time and then they were like “oh hey…” kinda thing and took it away before I could order it again-
 
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JambledUpWords said:
Nursing home, but Cobes is the head chef at said nursing home
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I can see him chilling with old folks, since they're at the same mental capacity (though that may be unfair to the old people) making them food hacks that wake up their dead tastes buds and ease their BMs

Edit: I'm now imagining him and an alzheimer guy rebooting each other's loop because they forgot they just said that
 
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