Off-Topic Losing people to transgenderism support thread - Support group for trans widows and other people who lost loved ones to troonism

[xX_rAcE_wAr_420_Xx]

An update to my situation… My roommate last night off handedly said she is trans and that her boyfriend is queer for dating her. She has no clue I this oppositely to her in every way imaginable and it peeves me. Everyone in my city thinks like her and it makes dating a hellish ordeal. She wears dresses and short skirts, has feminine stupid flower tattoos and thinks she is trans and a real dood. It drives me nuts.

For some reason this reminds me of the thread a while back about guys hooking up with ftms in various states of transition, in many cases because the women in question are fairly promiscuous. And one of the discussions there is whether it's ethical, for various reasons but primarily the almost-devil's-advocate position of "well it's very gender affirming for a gay man to have a ton of hookups with strangers".

I wonder what your roommate would think of people who take that position in real life. If she theoretically was on Grindr and matched with a Kiwi Farmer who called her a heckin' valid d00d to her face, but told his friends he did it for easy pussy, is that guy queer or not? Not to assume she's that type, of course, but it's like the lesbians who poon out and tell their partners that ackshully they're straight women now for dating a real dude, at what point is it true or just a total joke?

 

[Cronchyapple]

For some reason this reminds me of the thread a while back about guys hooking up with ftms in various states of transition, in many cases because the women in question are fairly promiscuous. And one of the discussions there is whether it's ethical, for various reasons but primarily the almost-devil's-advocate position of "well it's very gender affirming for a gay man to have a ton of hookups with strangers".

I wonder what your roommate would think of people who take that position in real life. If she theoretically was on Grindr and matched with a Kiwi Farmer who called her a heckin' valid d00d to her face, but told his friends he did it for easy pussy, is that guy queer or not? Not to assume she's that type, of course, but it's like the lesbians who poon out and tell their partners that ackshully they're straight women now for dating a real dude, at what point is it true or just a total joke?

The funny thing is her boyfriend is just a normal dude bro that actually had to explain to his mentally ill girlfriend that he isn’t “queer” bc he is dating her and she immediately had to explain for 30 minutes on the phone why he is queer. I have a feeling he knows she is mentally ill and trying to “fix” her. However that works… I wouldn't be surprised if her thoughts on being a real dood is just parroting whatever other people are saying. She believes she is non-binary because she wears “masculine” clothing like… pants… and a men’s t shirt. Wow. So masculine. She gets a new tattoo like every other month and it’s always a flower or a star of some kind and plasters her water bottle with vagina and dick stickers. I shit you not. Even thinking about her saying she is queer/gay makes my blood boil. I’ve had a shit experience trying to meet other gay people in my area. These LARPers are everywhere.

 

[Fapcop]

ok so i just started this new job landscaping, right. I look like a butch lesbian, i.e. i look trans. I detransitioned after 3 years identifying as NB and 3 months on testosterone. That was when I was 20; I am 23 now. All that bullshit is in my past getting buried under more worthwhile bullshit.

So at my new job there is this short guy. He is ridiculously nice. He doesn't talk like men do, even though he dresses like one. His shoes are clearly a size too big. Otherwise we pretty much dress the same. And his hands are the size of my hands: tiny. But I didn't want to assume anything because short guys exist.

The fourth day of work he pulls me aside by myself, asks my pronouns, says he's trans, been stealth for 10 years, and that NOBODY KNOWS. except, now me. He read me wrong because I'm not trans, I'm just a dyke.

I assured him—her—that I'm cool and I won't tell. But now it's sort of eating me alive. We spend 40 hours a week together. The lie is so enormous, it permeates everything. She was telling our coworkers about how her fiance needs to get her IUD out before they try for a baby. Bitch, you don't even have balls!! The nerve!

i mean if it's hard for me, it's gotta be so hard for her. This woman is one of the kindest, most hardworking people I've ever met. She seems happy.
But she's a liar, in unimaginably deep. She seems happy now. But it feels like a house of cards. a 10 year lie, goddamn the loneliness. she's so afraid of what's real, and she's built her life around a myth that can explode at any moment. all while wrecking her body. that makes me sad.

You’d do well to explain to her that she isn’t nearly as stealth as she thinks she is.

If you can tell, you can bet that others have noticed. Lil Pooner isn’t stealth. The only reason her “manhood” is intact, is because people have a wide tolerance for weird shit that doesn’t affect them.

It’s the kind of thing you discuss with buddies at work in private. Not something you call her out for in public. People don’t go “YOURE LYING!” When lil pooner goes off on one of her stories about the wife’s IUD. They look at each other with a discrete smirk or raised eyebrow.

Anyways, since she trusts you, I think you should explain to her that she likely isn’t as stealth as she thinks she is. Those kinds of lies have a way of being undone in a really painful way.

 

[Aunt Carol]

Anyways, since she trusts you, I think you should explain to her that she likely isn’t as stealth as she thinks she is. Those kinds of lies have a way of being undone in a really painful way.

And this is a workplace. She just needs to be reminded there's normal small talk plus not mentioning that she's trans, which is fine in a situation where you're all doing a job, and she's a good worker.

Dropping "hints" that she's planning to blow fat natural loads in her GF: laying it on too thick. That's what the nerds call "lampshading." Dial it down, li'l pooner.

 

[Fapcop]

Dropping "hints" that she's planning to blow fat natural loads in her GF

Number of men I know, who’ve had a masculine, detailed discussion about the wife’s IUD… AT WORK: Zero.

I’ll bet you that one in itself make a few go: “Gee, that’s weird… What an oddly womanly thing to talk about?!”

Anyways, since she trusts you, I think you should explain to her that she likely isn’t as stealth as she thinks she is. Those kinds of lies have a way of being undone in a really painful way.

I’m just going to be gay and quote myself.

But when word reaches lil’ pooner that she is in fact NOT effectively stealth anymore. You can bet your KF account that she’s not going to have a moment of introspection and realize she’s been living a lie.

What she will do, is to come to the conclusion that you have “outed her”, blame you for all of her misfortunes, and go full Karen on you, involving HR, etc.

So you may want to you know… Come out in front?

 

[Tetopettenson]

learned the hard way that you can have your crush on someone die really fast if they suddenly start transitioning. also learned the hard way that you wont stop caring about them

 

[FedPostalService]

She was telling our coworkers about how her fiance needs to get her IUD out before they try for a baby. Bitch, you don't even have balls!! The nerve!

Christ, that’s not a conversation that men would have with other men at work. That’s the sort of over sharing that women do.

How do troons and pooners always fail their LARP?

 

[Cronchyapple]

learned the hard way that you can have your crush on someone die really fast if they suddenly start transitioning. also learned the hard way that you wont stop caring about them

So sorry to hear this and… so relatable. I remember meeting a girl and months later on T she has a fucked up 12 year old boy voice and amish neck beard… yeeeesh.

 

[Fapcop]

Christ, that’s not a conversation that men would have with other men at work. That’s the sort of over sharing that women do.

IKR?! That one also made me chuckle. Bet you the lil’ dood outs herself on a daily basis.

How do troons and pooners always fail their LARP?

We’re not dealing with smart, well socialized people.

Also, they spend a good deal of their time in places where nobody questions anything, and where wearing “masc clothes” like tshirt and jeans means that you’re “questioning” for sure.

 

[FedPostalService]

IKR?! That one also made me chuckle. Bet you the lil’ dood outs herself on a daily basis.

We’re not dealing with smart, well socialized people.

Also, they spend a good deal of their time in places where nobody questions anything, and where wearing “masc clothes” like tshirt and jeans means that you’re “questioning” for sure.

If Judith Butler was in Minecraft I’d string her up from the nearest tree because her notion of gender being performative has destroyed countless lives.

 

[Shao Khan]

I work with a pooner and she is just odd

just stay away. pooners are a mix between a faggot and a women in the worst aspect of both of them. i worked with one of them and she presented as one of the boys until work started getting hard and the chimpout was fucking insane

 

[Tetopettenson]

So sorry to hear this and… so relatable. I remember meeting a girl and months later on T she has a fucked up 12 year old boy voice and amish neck beard… yeeeesh.

i have too much love in my heart for women to see them convinced that they arent beautiful as they are. the girl i had a crush on is starting t soon and im so worried for her. her voice is so beautiful and i get so so sad whenever i think about her losing that on t

 

[Lock Jaw]

Number of men I know, who’ve had a masculine, detailed discussion about the wife’s IUD… AT WORK: Zero.

I’ll bet you that one in itself make a few go: “Gee, that’s weird… What an oddly womanly thing to talk about?!”


I’m just going to be gay and quote myself.

But when word reaches lil’ pooner that she is in fact NOT effectively stealth anymore. You can bet your KF account that she’s not going to have a moment of introspection and realize she’s been living a lie.

What she will do, is to come to the conclusion that you have “outed her”, blame you for all of her misfortunes, and go full Karen on you, involving HR, etc.

So you may want to you know… Come out in front?

"lil pooner" is actually pretty convincing for a "short guy". It took me 3 whole days to catch on and I was in transworld for years! She chooses her clothes well to hide her body. Tho the bass pro baseball hat is definitely a little much (wince).

Most of my coworkers are straight and don't know the signs. All but one of them are women so the oversharing doesn't seem out of place, just... weirdly in place, which is harder to pick up on. If she were a real woman she'd be on the outskirts like the one man in our group.
They wouldn't even care if they knew she was trans. The only person who cares is her.

but yeah as you said, there's simply no way I could break her trust by telling everyone and keep my job at the same time. Unfortunately, I like my job and I like her. I just don't like that she's playing dress up 24/7 and that now it's my responsibility to be an actor in this stupid play.

 

[Lock Jaw]

update: my trans coworker told me yesterday that at four years old she "just knew" she was "missing fucking parts" . classic GD right? Today she told me that at 4 years old her dad locked her in the basement, told her she was going to "meet the devil" and made her watch violent porn down there with her. Case closed.

This is so fucking sad. she's never getting out of this. I like her so much I want to hug her tight. She's starving for connection. It's unfair that she put me in the situation of keeping her secret—of being the only one at work who knows— but I am happy that I can help her feel less alone. Because despite how we look now, as adults, a long time ago we were two little boyish girls indistinguishable from each other. so fucking sad. so so fucking sad.

 

[Idiot Sandwich the 3rd]

Update on my friend.
Just saw a picture of him in a goth style dress in his profile
Hes looking like a cheap prostitute.

Also hes sharing a lot of posts (mainly made by pooners) romanizing unhealthy fetishes like rape, breeding, non-con and more.

Its so over kiwibros

 

[FedPostalService]

Update on my friend.
Just saw a picture of him in a goth style dress in his profile
Hes looking like a cheap prostitute.

Also hes sharing a lot of posts (mainly made by pooners) romanizing unhealthy fetishes like rape, breeding, non-con and more.

Its so over kiwibros

I know you don’t need me to tell you this but he doesn’t sound safe for you to be around. Be safe, kiwi sis.

 

[Fapcop]

update: my trans coworker told me yesterday that at four years old she "just knew" she was "missing fucking parts" . classic GD right? Today she told me that at 4 years old her dad locked her in the basement, told her she was going to "meet the devil" and made her watch violent porn down there with her. Case closed.

This is so fucking sad. she's never getting out of this. I like her so much I want to hug her tight. She's starving for connection. It's unfair that she put me in the situation of keeping her secret—of being the only one at work who knows— but I am happy that I can help her feel less alone. Because despite how we look now, as adults, a long time ago we were two little boyish girls indistinguishable from each other. so fucking sad. so so fucking sad.

It’s sad, and not an easy situation to be in. But you’re not doing her any favors by encouraging her delusions.

How would she react if you told her how you feel, and that a woman can’t be a man, rotdog or not?

I think we both know the answer to that. You can’t base a relationship, let alone a friendship around carefully censoring yourself and playing along.

 

[Idiot Sandwich the 3rd]

I know you don’t need me to tell you this but he doesn’t sound safe for you to be around. Be safe, kiwi sis.

Thankfully he's currently an online friend. As well that I have distanced myself from him, I only observe what he posts out of morbid observation, but I dont interact with him anymore

 

[⋖ cørdion ⋗]

You’d do well to explain to her that she isn’t nearly as stealth as she thinks she is.

I remember one of those breadtube trannies talking about a friend who "totally stealthily passed at all times" but they actually wanted not to, so that they could yknow. Brag, boast and be brave about it. They clearly didn't "just" want to be a woman, as per evident with how troons went from being called "she" and sucking cock to wanting everyone to know they're a TRANSwoman.

 

[FedPostalService]

I remember one of those breadtube trannies talking about a friend who "totally stealthily passed at all times" but they actually wanted not to, so that they could yknow. Brag, boast and be brave about it. They clearly didn't "just" want to be a woman, as per evident with how troons went from being called "she" and sucking cock to wanting everyone to know they're a TRANSwoman.

The thing always is EVERYONE knows. Especially the women around this “stealthy” friend. He’s out the sucking dick as there a good chunk of men who are absolute degenerates who would blow there load in the mouth of anyone as long as it is easy.